I feel judged.

[Deleted]

My husband picked up the baby from daycare, and he had on new shoes that my dcp bought. J never wears shoes. I feel like she is passive aggressively telling me he needs to wear shoes. I know she means well, but I still feel judged. Shouldn't I get to pick out his first pair of shoes? And shouldn't she fricken ask me if I have shoes first? I know I sound ungrateful. I'm just really upset about this, and don't know if that feeling is justifiable. What do you guys think? Do your babies wear shoes to daycare? They are clearly walking shoes, and he is no where near walking. Do I say something to her or let it go? I really don't know why I'm nearly in tears over this! Thanks as always ladies.

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[imimahoney]

That is weird. I would be annoyed too. Ari wears fake Uggs but only because it is damn cold here. If I lived in a warm climate I would just send him in socks.

[eav2c]

C has a pair of shoes for fun that he wears rarely. I am pretty sure it is recommended that they don't wear shoes a lot at this age. I would say something in case she has them on all the time. Maybe she was just trying to be kind but I wouldn't want them on him a lot.

[muppetinma]

I'd just say thank you and send him to DC in socks tomorrow.

[spaghetticat]

Jan 24, 2013 21:32:35 GMT -5 muppetinma said:

I'd just say thank you and send him to DC in socks tomorrow.

This sounds like a good idea. 

V has never worn shoes. 

[ruby412]

I wouldn't be offended about the fact that they're his first pair. I'd be annoyed that she overstepped. No hard soled shoes until walking is what I've heard is best. You could share that info with your DCP and tell her thanks anyway.

[EnchantedSoul]

What Muppet said.

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[mscatra]

Send the shoes back tomorrow and say he had them on when he got home, but they must have been someone else's and see what she says.

[lolaburns]

It's weird but I wouldn't be in tears over it. I put L in pre-walker boots when we go out to keep his feet warm. Maybe she thought his feet were cold.


Sent from the bottom of a Clorox bottle.

[lolaburns]

Also, maybe she got confused and put the wrong shoes on your kid and it was just a human mistake.


Sent from the bottom of a Clorox bottle.

[Deleted]

I know I'm overreacting. I'll send him in socks tomorrow. It just felt really weird.

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[mikehoncho]

I think this is weird, but Liam doesn't have any shoes. I thought they didn't really "need" shoes till they were walking. Do your babies all have shoes? Dammit!

[mamasaurus]

Jan 24, 2013 21:30:49 GMT -5 @therealmc said:

Ummmmm, WTF? Overstepping much?

Uh, yeah!

I think it is odd for a DCP to buy things for a kid. A toy for the house? Ok, you run a daycare. Diapers? Yeah, any kid there might need spares from time to time.  I can even see getting a birthday gift for a kid. Shoes, though? Something seems off about that.

[mumegs]

Macy has never worn shoes, the pedi told us not to put them on her until she starts walking.

[mscatra]

Jan 24, 2013 21:40:20 GMT -5 mikehoncho said:

I think this is weird, but Liam doesn't have any shoes. I thought they didn't really "need" shoes till they were walking. Do your babies all have shoes? Dammit!

Maggie only has shoes for out of the house because they help keep her from taking her socks off in the middle of winter.  And provide more warmth.

*eta - and not anything with a hard sole.

[tuck]

Sadie has a ton of soft soled shoes, but I don't put them on her very often, and usually only to keep her socks on. It's not like I'm putting her down on the floor when we're out, anyway.

[katie]

She has worn some soft soled boots in pictures but that's it. My DCP, which is a center started putting barrettes in Lillian's hair. At first I was like, ok is this a message that I need to do my childs hair?! Then I got happy that the barrettes she gave me didn't fall out and looked cute. She would put them in L's bag for me. She has a daughter who is 5 or so and she said she never wore them. I don't know, I thought this was sweet and this teacher loved Lillian.

I think it is odd that she bought shoes though. I mean, why? Send him to her with just socks on tomorrow. L goes in socks and I have sent her barefoot too ::gasp:: I am in FL and in the infant room there were other barefoot babes.

[vthokie]

I wouldn't think too much of it. A doesn't wear shoes because she isn't walking. She does have a super cute pair of pink Chucks that are soft soled. I put them on her when we go out so her socks stay on. I also just bought her some soft soled stretchy boots for DC. Apparently they had a fire drill with the fire marshall today at DC. He said all the kids need shoes, a coat, hat, and gloves that stay at school. Just in case there's a fire or emergency and they have to be outside for an extended amount of time. Makes sense. Luckily I have an extra coat for her already.

[raynes]

Owen wears shoes for warmth (and cuteness, I mean, there's elephants on them!) and that's it. They're soft soled. I can understand that you'd be upset, and I do think the dcp overstepped, but you may be over reacting a tad.

[Deleted]

Silly Daycare! Socks are just fine for 9 month old babies.

Shoes on babies are decorative only, imo. Not necessary. Agree with what everyone else said about soft-soled shoes only when they start walking. I've always heard that hard-soled shoes are needed only when they have been walking for several months. They need to feel the ground! Barefoot is best, if it's warm enough and you can stand the germ factor.

[katfco]

I agree with Lola. Maybe she put them on the wrong child? Are you sure she bought them just for your LO? You could approach it as, "I saw he came home in shoes yesterday. Since he doesn't need shoes yet, I just wanted to give these back and make sure they get to the right person." and leave it at that.

[teamhayes]

I can't see Tamb's link to see why shoes are so bad but that is awfully bold of her to put shoes on your kid. I think I would be put off by it but maybe it was an accident and she thought they were yours. K wears shoes a lot. Like almost all the time we leave the house. He doesn't wear them very much when he plays or at daycare though. It sounds bad but his outfits look better with matching shoes. Do shoes ruin their feet? I will google.

[laurack]

hmm that does sound a bit weird. I would probably assume that they had put them on the wrong child if it were me, but we send her to a center and there are up to 7 infants in the room so sometimes she comes home with the wrong socks, and once she was wearing a pair of pants that were definitely not hers! I don't care about that stuff though.

But if she specifically bought shoes for your child and put them on him on purpose without asking, to me that would be a BIT strange. Especially since when they aren't walking they don't need shoes anyway.

I don't put shoes on Matilda because she hates shoes. She seems much more comfortable when she can move freely. I do have her first pair of clarks shoes, first walkers which are so cute, but too big for her still. And she hates them. She walks barefoot, then if I put shoes on her she can't walk at all.

[melis74]

I'm hoping it was shoes on the wrong child scenario. As others have said, that happens. Mia has come home with some interesting stuff before, lol. If she did buy them specifically for your child, that would definitely be overstepping. However, maybe she is just one of those super nicey-nice people who didn't mean anything bad by it and was just trying to be sweet and buy cute little baby things.

Mia has a ton of soft soled shoes and she had sandals for summer as well. I typically only put the shoes on her when it's cold out...it's FL so that doesn't happen too often but it does happen. The sandals I put on her when socks would have looked silly with her outfit. I am an anti-barefoot person, just one of my quirks.

[melis74]

Jan 24, 2013 22:09:28 GMT -5 katie said:

She has worn some soft soled boots in pictures but that's it. My DCP, which is a center started putting barrettes in Lillian's hair. At first I was like, ok is this a message that I need to do my childs hair?! Then I got happy that the barrettes she gave me didn't fall out and looked cute. She would put them in L's bag for me. She has a daughter who is 5 or so and she said she never wore them. I don't know, I thought this was sweet and this teacher loved Lillian.

I think it is odd that she bought shoes though. I mean, why? Send him to her with just socks on tomorrow. L goes in socks and I have sent her barefoot too ::gasp:: I am in FL and in the infant room there were other barefoot babes.

GASP! LOL. I had to chuckle...being a fellow Floridian. H asks why I always put socks on M for daycare. It's just a me thing, I don't like naked feet in public I guess. One day I left the house and forgot to put her socks on her and I felt HORRIBLE....I'm a weirdo, I know it and embrace it. 

[Deleted]

Most definatly not the wrong child. He goes to an in home daycare and is the youngest. she told my husband she felt he needed more support because he is pulling up on everything. I will have to talk to her today and tell her thank you, but I dont want shoes on him yet. I may throwin something like if you have questions or concerns I hope you will please ask! Sorry about lack of punctuation, Im on my slow phone.

[The Foozzler]

Tyler has never worn shoes to daycare. He is pulling up on things and creeping along them and I still don't feel the need for shoes. Plus, he could take them off.

He has a few pairs of shoes, but he only wears them when I am dressing him up and they are part of the look. Even still, they are only on him for a short amount of time.

[dixeedeluxe]

MIL bought shoes for my kids. I was annoyed when she did it with Edie, but I gave in. Adeline is wearing those hand-me-down shoes at MIL's house and it really does help her stand.

[biblionerd]

Wow! I assumed they were on the wrong baby also until you posted what she said to your husband. I would matter of factly take them back and tell her that she is not to wear shoes and they are not necessary and can br potentially damaging to growing feet. I didn't think it was old news that babies are not supposed to wear shoe until absolutely necessary- like walking outside- and even then as soft as possible.

[katie]

Jan 25, 2013 9:51:52 GMT -5 melis74 said:

Jan 24, 2013 22:09:28 GMT -5 katie said:

She has worn some soft soled boots in pictures but that's it. My DCP, which is a center started putting barrettes in Lillian's hair. At first I was like, ok is this a message that I need to do my childs hair?! Then I got happy that the barrettes she gave me didn't fall out and looked cute. She would put them in L's bag for me. She has a daughter who is 5 or so and she said she never wore them. I don't know, I thought this was sweet and this teacher loved Lillian.

I think it is odd that she bought shoes though. I mean, why? Send him to her with just socks on tomorrow. L goes in socks and I have sent her barefoot too ::gasp:: I am in FL and in the infant room there were other barefoot babes.

GASP! LOL. I had to chuckle...being a fellow Floridian. H asks why I always put socks on M for daycare. It's just a me thing, I don't like naked feet in public I guess. One day I left the house and forgot to put her socks on her and I felt HORRIBLE....I'm a weirdo, I know it and embrace it. 

I guess because I like to go barefoot that I always had her barefoot in the house or during summer. If it's about like 85 I don't usually put socks on her. Surprisingly her DC room is not that cold, it's very comfortable.

Where are you in FL? I am in the Orlando area.