Post by dcrunnergirl on May 14, 2012 8:57:54 GMT -5
Obviously, we went from 0 to 2, which was really hard. But, from talking to my friends, they all say that going from 0 to 1 was MUCH harder than going from 1 to 2 or 2 to 3.
Post by vanillacourage on May 14, 2012 9:04:22 GMT -5
It's been a piece of cake for us, but we've been blessed with a.) a very easy baby and b.) a pre-schooler who has juuuust the right amount of interest in the new baby. DS1 will be 4 in a few weeks and I think the age gap has worked well for us. He's out of diapers, wants to be helpful and loves to hold and feed DS2, but has enough of his own interests that he's not jealous of the new baby.
ETA a few things - 1. we kept DS1 in school for all but the couple days we were in the hospital. I think this was the right decision - it sucks money-wise, but it's been great to keep him in his routine and give me time to nap and focus on the baby during the day.
2. Ditto PP that going from 0 to 1 was much harder. This time around being up at night, getting all the baby gear to work, breastfeeding, etc is all old hat.
We have three and I can honestly say its been way easier then I ever expected. Much louder, but much easier. The hardest transition by far was none to one, it was a whole different world. Withdd2 though it was like she just fit right into our lives.
This is exactly how I felt. Zero to 1 rocked my world. 1 to 2 just made sense and DD folded into our family with such ease. It helped that she was amazing baby!
This was our experience as well. Kiddos are 2.5 years apart.
Mine are only 18 months apart so that factors into my response.
I personally thought that having two kids was exremely easy from the beginning. DD2 slept almost all of the time and only woke up a few times each night to eat. Because DD1 was so young when DD2 was born, we were still in the baby groove where diapers, bottles, and sleep deprivation weren't anything new - we were totally used to it. It took a few weeks to figure out a new routine that worked for all of us, but afterward I just incorporated DD2 into all of DD1's activities (I'm a SAHM so we have something going on outside of the home each morning) and now it's hard to remember what it was like with just one kid.
I will say, however, that it has become MUCH more challenging now that DD2 is teething and fully mobile. She is into everything and her nighttime sleep can be practically nonexistent at times. I feel like I'm constantly chasing after someone and they're usually going in two separate directions. DD1 is currently going through the terrible two's and the tantrums are outrageous. I sometimes feel like between her yelling and the baby not sleeping, I might lose my mind, LOL.
There are some really good times though now that they're starting to play together somewhat. DD1 gives her sister hugs all the time and really shows an interest in her. I know that in a few years the girls will be best friends and my job will start getting easier the more they can entertain each other.
This was exactly how it was for us. Our boys are three days shy of 16 months apart and are now 2.5 and almost 4. Things are so much easier now and we really enjoy being able to do the older things with them. They get along great for the most part and truly are each other's best friend.
Before I got pregnant with DS#2, I thought people who had 2 under 2 were insane but since we didn't have a choice with DS#2 (he was a "surprise") I couldn't imagine having done it any differently. There are no gaps in stages and DS#2 is so determined to keep up with DS#1 it is like having twins most of the time.
Honestly, the more I think about it, if we had a choice when to have the second I still don't know if we would have pulled the trigger. The thought of going back to the baby stage is scary along with deciding when the timing would work professionally and we are definitely enjoying the more mobility and independence as the boys get older.
My oldest was 6 weeks shy of 3 years old when my middle daughter was born. It wasn't awful. It wasn't as hard as going from no kids to 1 kid. There was jealousy and there were tears all around. But we had a schedule and we just slipped baby into it. With our first we couldn't find to time to eat dinner till 9 or 10 at night, but you can't do that with a 3 year old so we had to figure it out faster. We also knew what to expect and were better prepared.
We used the theory of divide and conquer. DH was generally in charge of our oldest, cooking and cleaning. I was generally in charge of everything baby (I was BFing so that just made sense, plus it gave me time to rest since I was up so much at night). Then we slowly phased to a better 50/50 split. DH actually slept in the guest room for the first 6 weeks so he was well rested to take care of everything else and could ignore me when I got bitchy cause I was tired.