I'm kind of pissed off...is this ok?

[amellis2]

For the past few months, I have been kind of sad.  It hit a peak a week or so ago, and I had to take a break from FB and the like.  I have been so sad and so very lonely.  We are just now seeing the benefits of the lower cost of living because DH got a promotion. 

The past four times that one of my "friends" has contacted me, it was to watch their kid. 

Fine.  I don't mind watching your kid occasionally. 

I do mind ONLY being contacted all the time for baby sitting.  Would I like to go walk around Target with someone?  Would I like to grab a cup of coffee?  Playground with our kids?

Nope.  Watch my kid?  Watch my kid?  Watch my kid?  They usually pay my $20, FOR THE ENTIRE DAY WITH 3 TODDLERS.  That's ok.  We're broke.  I'll take what I can get.

But you know what pisses me off the most??

"Hey, I need to __________ (go to the DMV.  Run to the store real fast.  Take a break from my kids.  You fill in the blank.)"

Crickets.  Sagebrush.  Not a damn word. 

Am I overreacting? 

[Deleted]

How are you overreacting if you aren't reacting at all and continuing to watch his/her kid since you SAH anyways? Sounds like you have a really shitty friend. Stop being a doormat and try to find some better friends, which easier said than done I know. Or take it for what it is, up your babysitting rate and make some $$ on the side.

[amellis2]

*friends. Two of them do this to me. FWIW, I have one good friend who swaps services with me and she also goes and does things with us.

I feel like a should point out that I am not just sitting around waiting for someone to invite us somewhere, we have invite these people over all the time. I know that doesn't change much about my OP, but yeah.

What should I be asking for? I was not allowed to baby sit when I was growing up, so I don't know what I should be asking for $$-wise.

[lauren9317]

You're not over reacting at all, that sucks! I wish you lived near me, we could gtg especially since we have so much in common now with the twins. Watching 2 newborns is hard so I can only imagine attending to 3 active toddlers.

[Deleted]

The one friend sounds like maybe it's a fair enough exchange? And that's good. Maybe not perfect, but good.

The other friend is using you, sadly. "I'm sorry, it's just not possible," needs to be your mantra for every unplanned, non-emergent request. Maybe you are busy cleaning out the DVR or napping, who cares. And if you want to move this person into an acquaintance zone, I'd charge $15/hour/1st kid, $25/hour/2 kids, etc.

I think you ARE making the effort, your friend is just being a bad friend.

[melis74]

People suck, it really sucks when it's someone you called a friend that acts that way. If I were you I would start charging her per hour or say you are busy. If/when she decides to actually "be your friend" again then maybe you could reevaluate. FWIW - I pay our sitter $10/hr, it's one of M's daycare teachers. Sorry you are having to deal with this, it's hard to admit a friendship isn't what it used to be.

[babybchbum]

Hugs! Wish you could come back to tampa and we could do a co-op for mommy services

[amellis2]

You have no idea how bad I want to be back in Tampa. I just do not want to move again. Maybe when the kids start school.