I posted a photo of DS and tagged DH's uncle in it because he gave DS the stuffed animal he was holding in the picture. My friend posted how cute "HE" was and then 2 of the uncle's friends (both women) posted how cute SHE was. I corrected them and said G was a boy. One woman's response...."I thought her name was A" I responded, "A is my name and I am his mother, I just tagged uncle in the photo" The woman never responded so I untagged uncle deleted the comments and blocked her. I find it hard to believe that you know so little about FB that you don't realize that the name associated to the FB post is not the infant's name and that the person you are talking to (reportedly with the same name, is also not an infant). Lesson Learned - no more tagging.
Bonus question: Do your ILs post photos of your DS/DD without your permission and are you okay with that? My FIL does this and my mom did it today. I don't know their friends and unsure how I feel about DS's photo reaching a larger (unknown) audience. WDYT?
I don't know her and just didn't feel like arguing with someone I don't know. I also realized I don't want random people seeing DS's photos and commenting on them. That was the only way to prevent her from seeing his photo per FB.
Post by vanillacourage on Feb 16, 2014 8:14:00 GMT -5
Someone making an innocent mistake and then not responding further when you correct them isn't an argument. I think the drama in this situation is solely on your side.
I do share your sympathy about Facebook and privacy though, it seems like they go out of their way to keep things as publicly viewable as possible.
I personally (and dh of course) like to be in control of any pictures of ds on the Internet. But there are so many pictures I wouldn't have seen if my friends didn't tag me in their pictures. So I'm basically a hypocrite.
Someone making an innocent mistake and then not responding further when you correct them isn't an argument. I think the drama in this situation is solely on your side.
I do share your sympathy about Facebook and privacy though, it seems like they go out of their way to keep things as publicly viewable as possible.
If someone told you they have the wrong gender wouldn't the first response be sorry my bad not well I thought the name was A. I fully admit PP hormones and sleep deprivation make me more annoyed than normal too lol.
Someone making an innocent mistake and then not responding further when you correct them isn't an argument. I think the drama in this situation is solely on your side.
I do share your sympathy about Facebook and privacy though, it seems like they go out of their way to keep things as publicly viewable as possible.
If someone told you they have the wrong gender wouldn't the first response be sorry my bad not well I thought the name was A. I fully admit PP hormones and sleep deprivation make me more annoyed than normal too lol.
Maybe she was just embarrassed and didn't want to draw more attention to it.
My parents and in-laws repost pictures of DS all the time, but it doesn't bother me. I am pretty easy going when it comes to this sort of thing though.
Someone making an innocent mistake and then not responding further when you correct them isn't an argument. I think the drama in this situation is solely on your side.
I do share your sympathy about Facebook and privacy though, it seems like they go out of their way to keep things as publicly viewable as possible.
If someone told you they have the wrong gender wouldn't the first response be sorry my bad not well I thought the name was A. I fully admit PP hormones and sleep deprivation make me more annoyed than normal too lol.
I think that you're taking a mistake about gender too personally. Babies really do look mostly alike to all but their closest people. They probably didn't feel the need to apologize (especially to someone who is basically a stranger). Hormones & sleep deprivation are no joke though so I get being initially irritated.
If someone told you they have the wrong gender wouldn't the first response be sorry my bad not well I thought the name was A. I fully admit PP hormones and sleep deprivation make me more annoyed than normal too lol.
I think that you're taking a mistake about gender too personally. Babies really do look mostly alike to all but their closest people. They probably didn't feel the need to apologize (especially to someone who is basically a stranger). Hormones & sleep deprivation are no joke though so I get being initially irritated.
True...I had people mistake my gender growing up - despite wearing pink frilly clothing and it always bothered me. Now, I always make sure I know the gender of a baby before using gender terms. I guess most people aren't as sensitive to this issue as I am.
My ILs don't use fb. My mom will post without asking each time, but I've told her that any she posts need to have been posted by me first (that way I know she won't post a cute, but only meant for family pictures like HJ in just a diaper but covered is kisses. She's always fully dressed in her pictures on fb.)
I would've apologized if I were the last in your scenario, but I wouldn't have blocked her. If your pictures are friends only she can't see them unless you tag the uncle or another mutual friend.
This won't be the first time someone mistakes your baby boy for a girl. I promise.
Exactly. I think HJ looks like a girl, but I've worn her in the carrier at the grocery store and had people guess wrong or ask because they were unsure. Unless she's in pink, some people just don't know so its a flat out guess. It's not personal, even if it feels that way because of the hormones.
My ILs don't use fb. My mom will post without asking each time, but I've told her that any she posts need to have been posted by me first (that way I know she won't post a cute, but only meant for family pictures like HJ in just a diaper but covered is kisses. She's always fully dressed in her pictures on fb.)
I would've apologized if I were the last in your scenario, but I wouldn't have blocked her. If your pictures are friends only she can't see them unless you tag the uncle or another mutual friend.
She was never my friend. When I clicked over block FB said this was the only way to prevent her from seeing my posts so that is why I did it.
Post by Stingyshark on Feb 16, 2014 8:51:38 GMT -5
I quit tagging MH in photos of P.. random people, that I don't know were commenting and it annoyed me. I don't know if MIL is posting pictures, I doubt it. She rarely uses FB. My mom ALWAYS asks if she can post pictures. She is a photographer, so she has a million and a half pictures.. usually she will make a private album so we can see it, and then we give her permission she will make it public.
As for blocking people.. I have no opinion on that. I block anyone & everyone that pisses me off. =)
I quit tagging MH in photos of P.. random people, that I don't know were commenting and it annoyed me. I don't know if MIL is posting pictures, I doubt it. She rarely uses FB. My mom ALWAYS asks if she can post pictures. She is a photographer, so she has a million and a half pictures.. usually she will make a private album so we can see it, and then we give her permission she will make it public.
As for blocking people.. I have no opinion on that. I block anyone & everyone that pisses me off. =)
Yea I don't know her and she's not my friend. I will never meet her so blocking her is nbd imo.
Post by shellbear09 on Feb 16, 2014 8:58:50 GMT -5
I don't get whys you were so upset. I would have ignored the comment probably. Old people are weird on fb.
Il's don't have fb but my mom does this. It would bother me sometimes but not because of privacy. I just dont comment if I don't like them. If you don't like it you could ask them not to.
My ILs don't use fb. My mom will post without asking each time, but I've told her that any she posts need to have been posted by me first (that way I know she won't post a cute, but only meant for family pictures like HJ in just a diaper but covered is kisses. She's always fully dressed in her pictures on fb.)
I would've apologized if I were the last in your scenario, but I wouldn't have blocked her. If your pictures are friends only she can't see them unless you tag the uncle or another mutual friend.
She was never my friend. When I clicked over block FB said this was the only way to prevent her from seeing my posts so that is why I did it.
No, but anytime you tag someone in your pictures it opens it up for any of their friends to see and comment on.
We share pictures with my parents and ILs on iCloud. My MIL occasionally posts those pictures on Facebook. It annoys me, but she has so few Facebook friends and I post pictures on Facebook, so it's not a hill I choose to die on.
As for other people posting pictures of your child, I think it's all or nothing. Either you don't put pictures of your child on the internet and insist others follow suit or you do put pictures of your child on the internet and accept that other people will too. I have found d no middle ground that seems to work.
I don't know her and just didn't feel like arguing with someone I don't know. I also realized I don't want random people seeing DS's photos and commenting on them. That was the only way to prevent her from seeing his photo per FB.
It sounds like you are the one who shouldn't be using FB. Your reaction was really bizarre and rude to someone who was trying to be nice to you.
Post by sporklemotion on Feb 16, 2014 14:36:03 GMT -5
I do find a lot of what happens on FB to be odd-- my DH doesn't have FB, so I am always taken aback when I see him in a picture on there. That said, the horse has kind of left the barn on this stuff. My SIL shared the hospital pic of my daughter, and I recognized maybe 1/4 of the people congratulating her. It felt weird that all of these people were discussing the birth of a child's hey don't know and may never meet, but I knew when I posted it that this might happen. Unless it becomes a meme like the ehrmagerd girl, I can't really worry too much about it.
My MIL shares every picture I post on Facebook of DD with her own feed. It drives. Me. Batty. Which is why I post very few pictures of DD on Facebook.
It's kind of too bad. Because MIL has no boundaries for things like that, I don't send her videos or photos like I send my parents. I send them to my family daily. MIL lost my trust on that stuff when she requested a pregnancy photo from me via text and then posted it on Facebook without asking me.
The block button is there so you can block those that Bother you. If her comment bothered you, you were appropriate to block her IMO. I don't think you were rude.
Post by changedname on Feb 16, 2014 14:56:53 GMT -5
I think you overreacted but chalk it up to pp hormones and move on. Old people are clueless with FB, hell, my DH would probably screw up with tags etc. I don't think she intentionally meant to insult you with the wrong sex comment.
Add me to the not understanding the big deal about what happened, and thinking the OP totally overreacted. But I also am a sharer of photos and don't really get the whole being worried or upset about people you don't know seeing your child's pictures.
Add me to the list of people confused by your reaction.
MIL isn't on FB, so it's a non-issue on that side. My mom will occasionally post/repost a picture I send her or put up. However, she's very careful not to name DD or give any identifying info, which is fine with me.
Count me in the not seeing the big deal club...I feel like if you tag someone in a picture, the possibility that someone you don't know may comment is a given and the gender mistake, while annoying, isn't necessarily blockworthy IMO. But then again, I reserve blocking for those who really piss me off and a genuine mistake doesn't usually piss me off.