My husband is making me crazy.

[cville]

I'm packing for a business trip.  During this trip I will have to have casual wear, business wear, and an outfit appropriate for a goddamned "casual" cocktail party.

So I'm like "what do you think of this for the 'casual cocktail' which I don't know what that means but I looked up the venue and it's all rustic luxe with metallic wallpaper and antler chandeliers?"  I'm wearing J Crew minnie pants in black and a flowy blue top.

He's like "I don't like capri pants in business settings." 

THEY'RE NOT CAPRI PANTS AND IT'S NOT BUSINESS-BUSINESS.  And I'm EXTRA EXTRA annoyed because it took me like eight minutes to just get the damn question out because he wasn't paying attention and needed, apparently, DETAILS on EVERY SINGLE THING I'LL BE DOING in order to answer my question.  Which he answered incorrectly.

[LLL]

Just kill him

[cville]

Point being, now I don't trust any decision I've made about any outfit and I want to cry and go shopping.

[speckledfrog]

Pull his hair!

[bania]

What you've chosen will be great. I can never take women's fashion advice from DH. He can dress himself well so I tend to ask, but I always regret it.

[ProfessorArtNerd]

But if you kill him, he won't bake for you! THINK OF THE COOKIES!

Instead, he must be punished. You should make a big purchase willy-nilly, without reading ANY reviews or doing ANY SORT OF RESEARCH WHATSOEVER. And just tell him it's pretty. Get. His. Goat.

[rupertpenny]

If kill him and whoever came up with the absolutely meaningless title of "casual cocktail." WTF.

[cville]

ALSO, motherfucker, I birthed you a son six months ago, AND NONE OF MY OTHER CASUAL RUSTIC COCKTAIL BUSINESS PANTS FUCKING FIT, OKAY?!!

[aussiecrush]

Did you throw hangers at him? You'll feel much better.

[rex]

mr cville, you should have said "great choice. i like that!"

[cville]

And another thing! He's like "it's wrinkled, will you iron it?"

Yes. Because I have a habit of running around in unironed clothing to work events. I'm so so annoyed.

[LLL]

I've stopped asking H for his opinion when it comes to things like this he's completely useless

[jane6672]

May 3, 2014 20:20:42 GMT -5 cville said:

And another thing! He's like "it's wrinkled, will you iron it?"

Yes. Because I have a habit of running around in unironed clothing to work events. I'm so so annoyed.

OMG.

I'll be getting ready for something so I'm in, say, a camisole with no bra and pj shorts, and MH will say "are you going to wear that out?"

YES, because I've suddenly transmorgified into a tween girl!!

[elleblue]

May 3, 2014 20:09:03 GMT -5 speckledfrog said:

Pull his hair!

Rip his weave* out. 


* I'm hoping that your H does not in fact have a toupee, otherwise the above comment is inappropriate.

[cville]

I stomped around being annoyed and feeling sorry for myself and I solved my problem (flowy black skirt + black ballet neck top + fun belt) for "casual cocktails" and the husband hugged me and now I'm less mad. Also, I found my missing jewelry roll when tossing things about in a fit of pique. Bonus!

[cuddlyevil]

May 3, 2014 20:09:03 GMT -5 speckledfrog said:

Pull his hair!

A friend of mine in college taught me this game called odd or even. Basically you go up to a guy wearing shorts, say "odd or even?" get their answer, then yank some hair off their legs.

It is really painful and mean. But it kind of seems appropriate tonight.

[cville]

May 3, 2014 20:58:15 GMT -5 elleblue said:

May 3, 2014 20:09:03 GMT -5 speckledfrog said:

Pull his hair!

Rip his weave* out. 


* I'm hoping that your H does not in fact have a toupee, otherwise the above comment is inappropriate.

Fear not.  He shaves his head.