Post by WinterIsComing on Jul 21, 2014 8:14:30 GMT -5
Getting ready and dreading my first day back to work from vacation. It's going to be a day spent catching up on all the emails and other crap I missed last week. Excited for this week though - I have lots of fun things planned!
Tonight I'm picking up the bed for DD's "new" room. The other pieces of decor and misc. should arrive this week. I'm getting SO EXCITED to have it complete!
I also have a dinner date tonight, so here's hoping that goes well. If not, on to the next. I'm just ready to be absolutely crazy about the right someone.
Last night I had a heartbreaking, but completely necessary talk with N. I've taken reconciliation off the table. While I wound love for that to happen, he is in a completely different place right now, and by me keeping that door open, even just a sliver, I can't move forward.
So it's shut. I'm super sad, but it had to be done. Were not talking until I feel like I can just be friends. It all kind of sucks, but in the long run will be a lot healthier in my part. I'm going to miss him though.
I generally had a wonderful weekend. My foot was literally kind of a pain but seems to slowly be getting better. When possible, I've stayed off of it though I did go on a light scenic walk yesterday that I enjoyed.
On Saturday, I went to my friend's wedding and she was really beautiful. It was pretty touching. I had a good time and I wish her the best. The BF came with and had a good time then later we went to a movie. We pretty much spent all of Saturday and Sunday together. I also enjoyed seeing a different friend on Friday night. Basically, I had a good, social weekend.
I really don't feel like being at work today, but alas I am here. I'm really focused on being healthier and there is so damn much food to cart around. I'm also really trying to up my water intake as I'm pretty sure I'm in constant state of dehydration. So I bought one of those water infuser pitchers. It seems to help. I'm now obsessed with making infused waters. yesterday was ginger and lemon, today strawberry and basil. This is how exciting my life is folks, infused water.
I really don't feel like being at work today, but alas I am here. I'm really focused on being healthier and there is so damn much food to cart around. I'm also really trying to up my water intake as I'm pretty sure I'm in constant state of dehydration. So I bought one of those water infuser pitchers. It seems to help. I'm now obsessed with making infused waters. yesterday was ginger and lemon, today strawberry and basil. This is how exciting my life is folks, infused water.
If it makes you feel better, my weekend involved the Lego movie and going to a home show.
bullygirl979 well I did go to a concert in the park, the sandcastle festival and the children's museum (with my nieces). But the inufsed water is really what has me the most excited.
bullygirl979 well I did go to a concert in the park, the sandcastle festival and the children's museum (with my nieces). But the inufsed water is really what has me the most excited.
Oh, I get it. I think the highlight of my weekend was the ridiculous pizza I made on Saturday night.
I really don't feel like being at work today, but alas I am here. I'm really focused on being healthier and there is so damn much food to cart around. I'm also really trying to up my water intake as I'm pretty sure I'm in constant state of dehydration. So I bought one of those water infuser pitchers. It seems to help. I'm now obsessed with making infused waters. yesterday was ginger and lemon, today strawberry and basil. This is how exciting my life is folks, infused water.
This sound delicious! I suck at drinking water and am probably always slightly dehydrated too - maybe this would help me. Off to google infuser pitchers...
Post by WinterIsComing on Jul 21, 2014 12:22:01 GMT -5
Thanks @pdx18!
STBXH just signed the divorce papers - looks like it's the countdown to the end. Not sure how I feel about that - a little happy, a lot sad. It's just shocking to think that 3 months ago I thought I would married forever. Things change so quickly
hugs WinterIsComing but honestly fast and furious is better than dragging out. Mine went on for eight months and it really sucked being in limbo for a while.
Last night I had a heartbreaking, but completely necessary talk with N. I've taken reconciliation off the table. While I wound love for that to happen, he is in a completely different place right now, and by me keeping that door open, even just a sliver, I can't move forward.
So it's shut. I'm super sad, but it had to be done. Were not talking until I feel like I can just be friends. It all kind of sucks, but in the long run will be a lot healthier in my part. I'm going to miss him though.
((hugs))
It's probably for the best that you step back from trying to be friends until you have moved on more. My situation is a little different since STBXH cheated, but even despite that, talking to him is still painful because it opens a wave of emotions. It's hard to turn that off when you have love the person for so long. I imagine that in your situation where the split was more amicable, that would be even harder to handle.
Hopefully some space will allow you time to heal and start to completely move on.
I went a friend's kid's 1st bday yesterday. There were "adult" goodie bags for all of us, containing (in addition to the candy the kids got too) a small bottle of liquor and condoms. LOL!!
hugs WinterIsComing but honestly fast and furious is better than dragging out. Mine went on for eight months and it really sucked being in limbo for a while.
Thanks! I know your probably right - like a bandaid, just rip it off, right? I expect the end of September and beginning of October to suck (would have been anniversary and divorce will be final) but I'm glad that I can not have to deal with it after that.
Good news: I had a date last night with the guy I met 6 years ago. He is seriously the sweetest guy. There was not one awkward silent moment. It definitely did not feel like we hadn't seen each other for 6 years. He surprised me with a picnic on the beach to watch the sunset. There was tons of making out. I have not had that much fun in a really long time!
Bad news: I went to the doctor this morning and the news is not good. The doctor reviewed my records from all my recent tests and told me he wants to have them redone, but most likely I will need some kind of surgery to correct my kidney issue. I cried all the way to work. I am trying to take this one step at a time, but it's really hard to think positively when I'm fearing the worst. Blah! Thank you for the positive vibes!
Sorry WinterIsComing It all sucks. We have similar stories. Sadly my divorce seems like it will take another 4 months. :/
In great news. I am now licensed to teach in my old state. Except I feel no where near ready to teach down there or move. I will start the process of changing it to where I am now. But it will take awhile and involves from what I read more tests and money.
If I was still where I was living with stbx and married to someone not a douche. I would of been able to find a job making $6000 more than stbx. Grrrr. I looked at jobs around there and housing today. But it makes me feel so overwhelmed. Back to the drawing board.
Bad news: I went to the doctor this morning and the news is not good. The doctor reviewed my records from all my recent tests and told me he wants to have them redone, but most likely I will need some kind of surgery to correct my kidney issue. I cried all the way to work. I am trying to take this one step at a time, but it's really hard to think positively when I'm fearing the worst. Blah! Thank you for the positive vibes!
hugs WinterIsComing but honestly fast and furious is better than dragging out. Mine went on for eight months and it really sucked being in limbo for a while.
Thanks! I know your probably right - like a bandaid, just rip it off, right? I expect the end of September and beginning of October to suck (would have been anniversary and divorce will be final) but I'm glad that I can not have to deal with it after that.
I am also expecting a crummy end of September - would have been 5 year anniversary. Stbx is being very slow with the paperwork - our waiting period is over, and we are on version two of the decree. In the end I think I am going to have to do it just to move the process along, I would sure rather have it done before the anniversary.
Sorry WinterIsComing It all sucks. We have similar stories. Sadly my divorce seems like it will take another 4 months. :/
In great news. I am now licensed to teach in my old state. Except I feel no where near ready to teach down there or move. I will start the process of changing it to where I am now. But it will take awhile and involves from what I read more tests and money.
If I was still where I was living with stbx and married to someone not a douche. I would of been able to find a job making $6000 more than stbx. Grrrr. I looked at jobs around there and housing today. But it makes me feel so overwhelmed. Back to the drawing board.
Sorry yours is taking so long Mau. The waiting part is definitely hard but I know based on our similar stories that we will both be better off once we get this all behind us. Sending lots of good housing and job vibes your way!!!
Eta: I just remembered you are dealing with his immigration issues in addition to the normal divorce stuff. ((Hugs)) From what I remember from your previous posts you are handling this all so well!
Thanks! I know your probably right - like a bandaid, just rip it off, right? I expect the end of September and beginning of October to suck (would have been anniversary and divorce will be final) but I'm glad that I can not have to deal with it after that.
I am also expecting a crummy end of September - would have been 5 year anniversary. Stbx is being very slow with the paperwork - our waiting period is over, and we are on version two of the decree. In the end I think I am going to have to do it just to move the process along, I would sure rather have it done before the anniversary.
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I think 2015 is going to be both of our years At this time next year you and I will hopefully be celebrating how far we have come.
Is there something specific that he is holding it up over? Luckily for me STBXH was to stupid to really care - I doubt he even read what he signed - so I came out ahead.
I wish it would finalize before our anniversary (September 25th) but unfortunately I don't think that will happen. I feel like I need to plan a mini-trip or something for around that day to turn a crappy time into something positive.
I am also expecting a crummy end of September - would have been 5 year anniversary. Stbx is being very slow with the paperwork - our waiting period is over, and we are on version two of the decree. In the end I think I am going to have to do it just to move the process along, I would sure rather have it done before the anniversary.
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I think 2015 is going to be both of our years At this time next year you and I will hopefully be celebrating how far we have come.
Is there something specific that he is holding it up over? Luckily for me STBXH was to stupid to really care - I doubt he even read what he signed - so I came out ahead.
I wish it would finalize before our anniversary (September 25th) but unfortunately I don't think that will happen. I feel like I need to plan a mini-trip or something for around that day to turn a crappy time into something positive.
He isn't actually fighting me on any of the terms - and I will come out ahead - he just isn't being proactive about finishing it. In our marriage I was definitely the doer...I researched things, made plans and because of that I originally wanted him to do the paperwork - a "you want it, you do it" mentality. It just isn't moving very fast which is starting to frustrate me. He is just trying to use standard templates and fill it out with our information. The lawyer I consulted told me that the way he is trying to deed the house to me won't work (hence the v2) - I think I am just going to have her write that section and I will send it to him. It bothers me that in the end I still will be supporting/helping him but I also will be helping myself get closure.
I also am thinking about trying to take a small trip around our anniversary (Sept 26th) - something not about him or us at all - but haven't made any progress figuring out what/where/who with yet.
He isn't actually fighting me on any of the terms - and I will come out ahead - he just isn't being proactive about finishing it. In our marriage I was definitely the doer...I researched things, made plans and because of that I originally wanted him to do the paperwork - a "you want it, you do it" mentality. It just isn't moving very fast which is starting to frustrate me. He is just trying to use standard templates and fill it out with our information. The lawyer I consulted told me that the way he is trying to deed the house to me won't work (hence the v2) - I think I am just going to have her write that section and I will send it to him. It bothers me that in the end I still will be supporting/helping him but I also will be helping myself get closure.
I also am thinking about trying to take a small trip around our anniversary (Sept 26th) - something not about him or us at all - but haven't made any progress figuring out what/where/who with yet.
Pretty sure we were married to the same person. I was 100% the doer in our relationship. I had an attorney draw up all the divorce papers because I knew he would never get around to it and if he did it would probably be done wrong. My attorney said that he barely even skimmed the documents that he signed yesterday. I'm still having to hand hold him a lot which is frustrating but I know it is the only way to get stuff done like him refinancing the condo he is keeping or dealing with the tenant that is currently in there. Pretty sure he is going to fail at being an adult once everything is finalized and he no longer has me to help with all of that.
My anniversary would have been September 25th. I'm debating maybe going to someplace I have always wanted to visit but have never been (NOLA, Austin, or Maine) or doing a relaxing beach weekend somewhere. Everyone I know seems to be busy that weekend so I think I might brave solo travel, eek!
He isn't actually fighting me on any of the terms - and I will come out ahead - he just isn't being proactive about finishing it. In our marriage I was definitely the doer...I researched things, made plans and because of that I originally wanted him to do the paperwork - a "you want it, you do it" mentality. It just isn't moving very fast which is starting to frustrate me. He is just trying to use standard templates and fill it out with our information. The lawyer I consulted told me that the way he is trying to deed the house to me won't work (hence the v2) - I think I am just going to have her write that section and I will send it to him. It bothers me that in the end I still will be supporting/helping him but I also will be helping myself get closure.
I also am thinking about trying to take a small trip around our anniversary (Sept 26th) - something not about him or us at all - but haven't made any progress figuring out what/where/who with yet.
Pretty sure we were married to the same person. I was 100% the doer in our relationship. I had an attorney draw up all the divorce papers because I knew he would never get around to it and if he did it would probably be done wrong. My attorney said that he barely even skimmed the documents that he signed yesterday. I'm still having to hand hold him a lot which is frustrating but I know it is the only way to get stuff done like him refinancing the condo he is keeping or dealing with the tenant that is currently in there. Pretty sure he is going to fail at being an adult once everything is finalized and he no longer has me to help with all of that.
My anniversary would have been September 25th. I'm debating maybe going to someplace I have always wanted to visit but have never been (NOLA, Austin, or Maine) or doing a relaxing beach weekend somewhere. Everyone I know seems to be busy that weekend so I think I might brave solo travel, eek!