Dogs at baby playgroup

[ladygrey]

I recently started attending a local baby playgroup. At the last two gatherings (held at different homes), the hosts have let their dogs run free in the house among the babies, who range from 6-18 months old. I think it's a little rude (and possibly dangerous) to do this in a home full of unfamiliar kids who don't know these animals (and vice versa) The dogs (two labs, a husky, and a golden retriever) seemed friendly enough, but you never know when a little lick could turn into a bite or scratch. IDK, am I being too uptight and protective, or is this a valid concern?

 





  

[catbus]

Valid. The group I was part of specifically had a rule that the hist must separate animals from the group during "meetings."

[scribellesam]

I like dogs, but don't have one. I'm definitely nervous having DS around dogs I don't know, even more so if he were a baby. This situation would bother me and I wouldn't have much fun at the play date because I'd want to be right by my baby at all times.

[pacificrules]

We have a dog (choc lab) and always have her separated when we have guests with kids over. Dogs often need just as much parenting/attention as a baby when new people are around (or maybe that's just ours?); I think it's too much for the host to try to successfully manage their kid(s), dog, and guests all at once. 

[SpartanGirl]

I have a dog and always put the dog in her kennel (or somewhere else safe) when I host playgroups. My dog is the friendliest, sweetest dog, but a lot of kids and noise and grabbing (babies especially love to grab ears and tails) can make even the calmest dog nervous. I put her away as much for HER safety as for the kids - even when the kids know my dog really well.

[Birdie]

I love my dog. Loooovvvveee. But stranger dogs + stranger kids gives me anxiety. I would be anxious that a kid would pull Ozzies tail and make him yelp/bite and I would worry some random dog would nip my baby.

So while I'm a huge dog lover I'm also a believer in being polite when it comes to your dog and other people. If you invite guests into your house you need to be accommodating if they don't want your dog near them (within reason!)

On the flip side there is nothing more stress inducing than taking Oz to Petsmart and people letting their kids get all up in his face. OMG.

[turtlegirl]

I LOVE LOVE LOVE my dog and he's the biggest sweetheart ever. And we have always let him roam free with our own kids in the house. But when I hosted large "mommy and me" playdates during DS1's first 2 years I always put him outside or gated him in our master bedroom.

When we have smaller gatherings with just friends kids and they've been to our house a bunch, we know the kids well, etc we don't separate anymore.

[pugz]

Wtf these people are dumb. Pets do not belong at playgroup

[erbear]

I've never thought twice about having babies over here with my dogs (greyhounds). I always let people know I had dogs before they came over but no one seemed to care.

Also, they are the world's laziest dogs so they might get up and turn around once before lying back down in the course of a two hour play date.

[kangaroo11]

Once the kids were walking, I've allowed the dog to hang out. But we only have a couple kids over at a time.

[gibbinator]

It's a valid concern on paper. Especially as you don't know the dogs well yourself.

One of my mom friends who sometimes hosts our group has 2 large dogs (I think both are lab mixes) that roam in an among our babies and, now, toddlers. It's never really bothered me and most of us just mind our children around them. Ds is used to various dogs and cats and is very gentle, and the dogs are used to her children. They also have an escape route if they want to avoid kids.

[cricketwife]

I don't have dogs so I love having DS around dogs at my friends ' houses. He loves them and it gives him expodure tbst he wouldnt have otherwise. Ive never been in a playgroup situation where this has happened but I would think each parent would be watching their child so it would be okay. It eould sldo depend on the size if the group. But I understand that I'm in the minority here.

[meltoine]

I don't leave my dogs loose at play dates. They are sweethearts and well-trained, but its not a risk worth taking. There is no downside to putting them outside or upstairs for a couple of hours.

[winecheery]

I think the concerns are valid. It sounds like it could easily get out of hand with so many LOs running around. The dog could get spooked and go nuts, and not even try to hurt anyone, but just become really hyper or something, and that might scare the kids too and then I foresee things breaking or someone crying, at the very least.

This thread makes me wonder if I am supposed to lock/separate my cats from kids who come to our home for the first time. Being cats, they usually hide themselves or run away, but not always. Sometimes they just chill on the couch or whatever, doing their own thing. But what is cat etiquette?? (#thread hijack, sorry)

[Jalapeñomel]

I have two dogs, and if we had a play date, we'd crate them. If the mom wanted to have their baby introduced to the dogs, we'd do so in another room without other children around. Safer for baby and dogs!

[dcn]

Nope. I am not comfortable with that.

[browneyedgirl9]

I am overly nervous and cautions with DS around dogs. This would bother me.

[dragonfly08]

I had a Sheltie back when #1 was younger and we first hosted play dates. IIRC, I kept him separate in the beginning but all of my friends were comfortable around dogs, so it wasn't long before he was allowed out and about with the kids. But he was 11+ years old and all he wanted to do was curl up in a corner and observe quietly, when he wasn't taking a nap, so he really wasn't all up in any of the kids' business.

I can't do play dates now in houses with dogs that roam, but not b/c I have any concerns.  Rather, my youngest is afraid of them. She'll get hysterical.  Her friends' moms are really good about keeping the dog otherwise occupied when DD is in the house.

[ilikedonuts]

My dog is always locked up when we have playdates even ones with just one kid.

[Deleted]

Valid concern. I always separate my dog from play groups, and DS and his friends are 2yo+! I would certainly expect no dogs around infants and young toddlers.

[ladygrey]

Thanks everyone. I'm glad to hear that others feel this way too. I love dogs as much as the next person, but they really don't need to be in the same room as a bunch of unfamiliar kids.

[redheadk]

I'll be the lone dissenter and say it depends. Our playgroup is the same group of moms/toddlers each time and isn't open to randoms. When I host, I put my cocker spaniel away from the play area but it is nearly impossible to keep my shih tzu away from me for the first 30 minutes or so. Thankfully she is really calm and stays away from the kids (and tolerates kids well) so I just keep her near me off to the side for the first 30 minutes or so then she'll go in our bedroom after that. My other friends keep their pets out, too, all cats and small dogs. I think since we ALL have small pets that are friendly with kids, we are more okay with it but it's something we've discussed. As long as it's ok with the group, the host is upfront about animals being there, the host is keeping an eye on the animals, I think it's fine.

[MadamePresident]

When I have just one friend come over, I generally don't put the dog up, except for one friend whose daughter is afraid. But most of my friends also have dogs. If I had a house full of babies, I would put him in another room. Unfortunately we would then get to listen to lovely beagle howls.

[bowies]

I love my dogs but we always put them upstairs whenever any new guest is coming over - partly because one gets overstimulated quickly and the other can be an attention whore, but also because we know not everyone loves dogs. If our guests ask us to release the hounds, we do, but keep the upstairs open in case they need some alone time. I'd be even more of a hawk on this with babies in the house, even those accustomed to their own dogs. Heck, even though our dogs are total lovemuffins, we've introduced them to our own DS very slowly. I wouldn't even attempt such a thing with other people's babies.

[redpenmama]

I have been to playdates where (very small, sleeping) dogs were out. I've been to others where the dog was gated off but the kids could see it. This was the worst-case scenario for me when DD was younger because she would only want to play with/pet the dog and would cry when it went out of sight. The vast majority of the time, however, dogs are put away. We always put our dog away.

[hermione]

I go as far as scheduling play dates on days the dog goes to doggie daycare (we send him 1-2 times a week for the exercise). Tuxedo is too high strung for me to be willing to risk it.

[osulori]

I have two dogs, and when AJ's cousin comes over to play on Saturday the dogs are going down in the family room to chill on the couch. For both the babies' safety (AJ's cousin is 8 months old) and for the dogs'. I feel like the host in the OP is playing with fire with that many children and dogs running around.

[sent]

I am terrified of dogs. I tell people this up front. I would not take my baby to someone's home where the dog roams free.

[lolo]

Jul 21, 2014 17:37:53 GMT -5 scribellesam said:

I like dogs, but don't have one. I'm definitely nervous having DS around dogs I don't know, even more so if he were a baby. This situation would bother me and I wouldn't have much fun at the play date because I'd want to be right by my baby at all times.

Yup.

Honestly it would be so much effort for me that I probably wouldn't go back. 

[Birdie]

Jul 21, 2014 18:02:43 GMT -5 kangaroo11 said:

Once the kids were walking, I've allowed the dog to hang out. But we only have a couple kids over at a time.

I should modify my answer that this is true for me too. I've had friends' kids over and haven't put Oz away. But the kids were walking age where they weren't tiny babies rolling around on the ground. My dog is the sweetest, most gentle dog ever but I still worry about DS being on the ground unsupervised with Oz nearby. I just envision this scenario where they're both sitting/laying sweetly next to each other and then something catches Ozzie's attention to make him jump up and then *STOMP on baby's face*. This is the similar scene I have playing in my head for the OP.