Hon, you need to do whatever it takes to preserve your sanity. Moving across the country and starting a new life with a new home, new jobs and new schools is more than enough stress all by itself.
You know (you really do know) that the kids will be just fine. And so will you. But if changing the logistics helps you sleep and minimizes anxiety, then just do it. Life's too short to make yourself crazy over things you really can control. Sanity needs to prevail. Let me know how I can help. Love you.
I hate being in the car for long periods of time so I don't think you are crazy. Are you having anxiety about having the kids not with you for the 4 nights, is that the main reason?
I would do it. I would have too much anxiety not being with my kids and in control of them. I would be a nervous wreck the whole drive until I was reunited with them.
And my anxiety wouldn't be being away from my kids, it would be not being with them through all the changes especially with Mia because she is so young.
Sorry that this is so stressful for you. I think that any option you do, you'll be just fine. But if you feel that it would be less stressful to fly, then do that if it's still an option. Not sure how quickly that you can get a pod. As you know, we just did a long distance move. We opted to fly rather than drive. For us, it was a bit more, but not by much of you consider gas, tolls, hotel rooms, etc. Plus, the thought of a cross country drive gave me nightmares. I know that people do it all the time, but we would have had the kids with us and not too much time before my husband had to start at his new job. The timing would have been tight. Do you have cars that you are shipping west on a truck? That cost a pretty penny, but still worth not having to Drive and put all those miles on. Good luck! I know it's so stressful, but keep thinking that it's temporary and how great it will be when you arrive.
You're not crazy. That would cause me so much anxiety, I wouldn't be able to breathe. Do what you need to do in order to preserve your sanity. There are so many changes happening so quickly for your family, that's enough to cause even the coolest cucumber to freak the hell out. If going with the kids would make you feel even the littlest bit better, do it.
I hate being in the car for long periods of time so I don't think you are crazy. Are you having anxiety about having the kids not with you for the 4 nights, is that the main reason?
Yes plus them being on a plane without us. I don't like that separation.
Not crazy at all! And given the cost is similiar, I don't see why you shouldn't.
Post by sunshineluv on Jul 24, 2014 9:24:50 GMT -5
With a big move like this, do you think if you make this change, you will find something else to be stressed or anxious about? Or do you think the anxiety is specific to this aspect?
With a big move like this, do you think if you make this change, you will find something else to be stressed or anxious about? Or do you think the anxiety is specific to this aspect?
I think it is pretty specific to being separated from my kids and the fact that we would be in a giant moving truck and them on a plane, separately. I also don't have 100% trust in my family to keep an eye on Mia and thinking about it constantly is likely to cause a nervous breakdown.
ETA: I don't really have anxiety about the move itself. I am over the moon excited for it.
In that case I think I would change your plans. Anything you can do to prevent a nervous breakdown is a smart move!
Speaking as a family who had been living out of suitcases for three weeks before the first of our stuff showed up, you can totally do four days. Pack clothes and essentials and treat it like a long weekend.
There is no way I'd put A on a plane without me at this point, no matter what logic says. I'm not usually affected by the news in regards to our travelling schedule, but this past week has just been too much.
If you discover you need things that you can't easily fly with, PM me and I'll see if we have things hanging around that you can borrow until your pod shows up.
Hon, you need to do whatever it takes to preserve your sanity. Moving across the country and starting a new life with a new home, new jobs and new schools is more than enough stress all by itself.
You know (you really do know) that the kids will be just fine. And so will you. But if changing the logistics helps you sleep and minimizes anxiety, then just do it. Life's too short to make yourself crazy over things you really can control. Sanity needs to prevail. Let me know how I can help. Love you.
I think you should fly with your kids. It's not worth the anxiety it is causing you to drive your stuff, and 4 days without should be no problem. I have anxiety flying and the thought of Ada flying without me makes me really anxious. Even though I know she would be fine, I can't stop the anxiety.
Fly, without a doubt. This is a stressful time as is, do whatever you need to in order to lessen additional stress and anxiety. Flying with kids is rough and as much as I trust my mom/in laws etc I wouldn't want to put S on a plane without me.
While super exciting, moving is one of the most stressful experiences in life. If you can do anything to ease the stress and anxiety during this process - just do it.
When we make a similar move in about 2 years, I will be flying with the kids and H will be driving.I couldn't stand being in a car for that length of time. I would go insane.
I'm with everyone else -- do what makes you the most comfortable. When we moved, I flew bc I had to start my new job and we paid for my retired FIL to fly out to then drive cross-country with DH. They had a fun adventure and I didn't have to be in the car for that long. 4 days is too long for you to be stressing about your kids, especially if you're not confident that your mom will keep a close enough eye on them.
I'm relieved for you. Driving is for the birds. Oh wait, so is flying but the driving scenario sounded sucky,
Are you taking your scooter to CO?
I keep going back and forth with this. The main reason I got it in the first place was because of my ridiculous commute to Manhattan. I will now be 15-20 minutes from work. I like the convenience of it but it is really not safe.
I think if you LOVE riding it, take it. If it was just utility I would sell it and let it be at home in NYC. Do you have 2 cars as well? Or, will E not need one for awhile?
Thanks everyone. I just bought our plane tickets so that seals the deal!!! I feel incredibly relieved.
I'm late to weigh in, but I think you made the right decision. I have anxiety issues as well, so I totally would have done the same thing. Moving is stressful enough that you don't need anxiety on top of it for sure.
I think if you LOVE riding it, take it. If it was just utility I would sell it and let it be at home in NYC. Do you have 2 cars as well? Or, will E not need one for awhile?
yea, I definitely do not love it. The only thing I love about it is the fact that it keeps me off the subways. We have a car now but will sell it here. We were planning on trading it in for a lease anyway so we will just lease a car out there. We will play it by ear to see if we will require another car. We probably will but we will wait and see.
I would leave it and ear mark the funds for something fun.
I'm so sorry this is causing you so much anxiety. It would cause me issues too. I think you should go on the flight together, although I'm sure they would be fine with your mom and niece. It's just too much angst for you on top of moving. Big hugs and I hope your H is understanding about it.