I like the idea of having your nanny get her ready for bed. We do this on the nights we will be late. It maybe rough in the begining but maybe she will get use to that being the routine.
Post by barefootcontessa on Aug 26, 2014 8:51:30 GMT -5
IME keeping kids up to see a parent does not work well because the child gets all excited and it takes a while for them to settle back down. I would try to have quality time in the morning when she is well rested.
Can you make 8:30 her bedtime. Have the nanny get her fully ready for bed, and then spend the half an hour cuddling and reading books in bed before you tuck her in.
That way her routine STARTS at like 7:30 and she winds down, but you still get to spend that time together.
Honestly- for now, while you're trying to fix the sleep problem, I'd have the nanny put her down and one those days, you won't see her at night. it sucks, but I'd try for consistency right now and also just to see if it works!
Yup. The later DS goes to bed - the 1- harder it is to get him to chill out and go to sleep, and 2- he tends to wake up EARLIER the next day! He's the poster child for "sleep begets sleep".
So, even more so, I reiterate what I just wrote in my PP.
If she's even more tired, even more reason to get her to bed earlier. She NEEDS sleep.
I don't know what this is worth, but I'll share it anyhow- I have a friend whose DD is DSs age (5). She's always talked about how they keep DD up late (sometimes 10, if not later) because if she didn't, her DH would hardly get to see DD. They eat dinner late too - so that they can have "family dinner".
But then she was also complaining to me at the start of last year (4's preschool) that DD didn't seem to know her alphabet as well as the other kids. Now- there could be MANY reasons for this. But I absolutely wouldn't be surprised if a part of it is because her DD was always SO TIRED at school. Left on her own, she would sleep until 9. Obviously w/ work and preschool, they couldn't let her sleep in. So her sleep was REALLY stunted. Up late to see daddy, up early to go to school.
I know that mornings can be a bit hectic, but I also think that's a time to perhaps shift some of the focus to for "quality time". If nights are too hard, try for mornings! I love DS in the morning- he's much more fun BECAUSE he's well rested!
Also I think our kids are about the same age. DS USED to be the poster child for an early bedtime, but now he naps LATE into the afternoon ( 2-5) and can stay up until 8:30 1-2 nights a week.The other nights he needs to be in bed between 7:30-8:00 I still get him out of bed at 6:30am, but on the weekends I will let him sleep in until 7am.
Will she play in her bed quietly for awhile in the AM? DS loves his " cozy" time on the weekends.
Honestly- for now, while you're trying to fix the sleep problem, I'd have the nanny put her down and one those days, you won't see her at night. it sucks, but I'd try for consistency right now and also just to see if it works!
This! H and I both have varying schedules. I went through a phase where I was all, "H must see the kids! Everyday! All the time!" It didn't work. He just got an overtired kid who couldn't of cared less anyways. Instead of playtime it was an hour fight for bed.
Now she's in bed by 9. No matter what. No questions asked. She's also a lot happier on the nights H is home, because she's not so tired and confused about bedtime.
Mornings are still a challenge for us. I let her sleep until whenever depending on my work schedule. So somedays it's 6, somedays it's 8. She seems okay with that, so I don't fight the battle. It just determines whether she takes a nap that day or plays in her room.
Post by pinkdutchtulips on Aug 27, 2014 12:07:39 GMT -5
even though my kiddo is older (5) i'll be keeping an eye on this thread .... bedtime until she was about 3 was fine then came my new commute/wk schedule that had us out of the house at 6a and back at the house at 6p w/ me going to bed at 9p (after getting dinner together, cleaning up dinner, picking up crap AND getting some time in w/ dd) while trying to her down by 8:30p. throw in a separation (xh and i) and her sleep went to crap !
its a challenge getting her down by 8:30p now even if we get home by 6:30-7p
Post by dancingirl21 on Aug 27, 2014 12:50:10 GMT -5
J is much younger (13 months) but we are going through this too. He has recently decided that no way in hell is he going to take an afternoon nap. It's been 2 weeks of fighting him so we decided to give it up. He wakes up EARLY. This morning, he was up at 5:10. I gave him milk and rocked him then let him hang out in his crib until 6:30. He may have dozed a bit but mostly just chatted with himself. Because he's getting up so early, he wants his nap at 10am, which means he's done napping most days at 12:30 or 1 at the latest.
Because of all this, we have bumped up his bedtime from 7 to 6:30 and even 6:15. I get home by 5:30, feed him, play for 20 minutes and get him upstairs for bath. H is home by 6 at the very earliest so sees him maybe 3 days per week for 20 minutes at night.
It sucks, but in the end we know he needs the sleep. I guess in your situation, I'd have the nanny put her down on those late nights.
Post by quickstepstar on Aug 27, 2014 12:56:48 GMT -5
Honestly, I think she needs an even earlier bedtime (7 or 7:30) for this wake up time at this age. K is about the same age as your DD (3 in early November), and she goes to bed between 7-7:30 and gets up around 7. Does L still nap? I would have the nanny put her down for sure.