I started a new job Monday. It's a temporary position in a company I want to work in, but it's a step below what I did before (I got laid off, so it was that or make no money). When I first discussed the job with the recruiter, she basically framed it as "this is below your level, but I think you can bring a lot to the team and it will be a good foot in the door for some of the positions that will should be posted in the next few months that are more in line with your experience/interests/goals". Great.
Today was my third day and I thought everything was going fine. The people are nice, and I've been trying to sell myself in the "getting to know you" conversations - everyone asks what you did before, what you want to do, what you hope to get out of the role, etc. I have basically said I want to work at the company, I took this role to learn about the company and get a foot in the door, and I have XYZ experience, would love to contribute beyond the administrative stuff my role entails, and I'd like to eventually become an HR business partner and hope that this role will help me get there.
I haven't been obnoxious about it IMO - I've said it once to each person who asked - and once to someone who didn't ask - we had a group phone call with the department head yesterday and he told us all about his direction for the department, so I followed up with an email today giving him a general background about what I've done in the past and volunteering to contribute to other projects as much as time allows - I haven't met him and don't know if he's even seen my resume, so I thought I should let him know what I'm interested in so when he is making decisions about the upcoming positions he's aware that I'm qualified to do certain things. There have been a handful of times when someone has said "have you done this before?" or "have you seen this before" and I've said yes.
ANYWAY, the recruiter who hired me called me into her office at the end of the day today and asked me how things were going and what I thought of the job so far. She was very nice about it and made it clear this was not HER opinion, but she said that other(s?) had told her that they thought I was bored and thought this position was "beneath me".
Guys, this really hurt my feelings. I actually cried at my desk after assuring her that that wasn't the case, I was excited to start contributing, etc. I have always felt like relationship building and being warm and kind to people was one of my best strengths - the idea that someone sees me as stuck up about something is very upsetting. Further, I have no idea what would give them that idea. She said someone thought I looked bored or something along those lines - well, the days have been long and maybe that's just my face. IDK. I don't feel like I've been any less enthusiastic and actually feel I've tried to show enthusiasm. We haven't done any actual work until this afternoon, and when the person training the three new people asked "would someone like to take this first task", I was the first to volunteer! Clearly I'm not refusing to do work that is "beneath me". I am sorry if I don't look enthralled while learning to schedule meetings in Outlook - something I've done a million times and don't need training on - and I've taken notes, asked questions, and not felt like anything we've done was a waste of time or like it was beneath me. I can't help it if I have bitchy resting face?
I guess I don't know where to go from here. I feel like maybe I need to tone down my enthusiasm for moving past this temp job and into a regular role, but truth is this IS a step back, I AM overqualified, and I'm not being paid enough to pay my bills in the long run and don't have benefits. I thought it was prudent to make it known (when asked) that I have goals beyond a temporary position, but apparently that's a misstep. And like I said, it's not like I've said "I don't want to do this job right now" or brought up a new position constantly, just when people ask!
Any advice? I don't know what my specific question is. I feel like this temp job is one long interview or audition and I'm already failing at it, which makes me question my ability to "play the game" of having a successful career. I feel like my career so far has largely been a failure anyway and I was really hoping this was going to be the start of turning things around in a good direction. I feel very deflated and honestly my feelings are hurt.
Just back down on that kind of talk for a little. Show that the position is beneath you by doing great work, not saying it. Have these types of conversations in 6 months once you have proved yourself.
Maybe instead of focusing your conversation(s) in what you hope to do in the future to focus on what you can contribute now in your current role.
I can see if my new employee came in with "I can't wait to get promoted..future talk future talk" Type convos I would get annoyed since they don't know the company, job, processes, etc (I'm assuming you don't know yet either).
Oh Bucky I am so sorry. You have really had a tough row to hoe in the past two years.
Did you ever get that other interview?
Thanks.
I did go to the other interview. I actually thought the job sounded a lot better than I originally anticipated - but they said it would be 4-6 weeks before a decision was made because I was their first interview. I told them I was definitely interested but who knows what will happen with that. It's a small organization (basically a long term care facility) and sounds like it might actually be a really good opportunity to do some things I may never get a chance to do in a larger organization. So that's cool.
Aw, I'm sorry Bucky. I agree it may have been a little too much too soon, but just back off a bit, do good work, and be enthusiastic about your current role
I'm so sorry that happened, Bucky. Once I got feedback from a supervisor that I didn't look like I was paying attention, but I must be because I always replied on topic, so I needed to work on how I came across. I had been getting headaches and was waiting for my glasses to come in. I wasn't looking because everything was blurry and it hurt to focus! Which he knew! But he didnt put two and two together. When I replied "could it be because I've been getting those headaches and I can't see very well?" He was like "Um. Well. Yes. It could be that. Ok." I tell this story to illustrate that feedback can sometimes be helpful, but it can also be really subjective and weird.
I probably would have done the same thing you're doing, but now that you know how it's coming across, just switch gears and lead with your actions. Remember, your first priority is getting promoted but their first priority is seeing if you are a good fit for the current job. Try not to get too far ahead of yourself, kwim?
And don't let those bitches get you down! Fuck them.
Well that's obnoxious! I feel like your responses were perfectly acceptable, but my opinion doesn't count in this situation. I'm sorry you cried on day 3- that sucks.
I would just keep working hard and let your work speak for itself. And keep your feelers out there for other, permanent, positions.
I think I'm reading the tone a little different than everyone else?
I don't think Bucky was necessarily coming across as feeling overly qualified - I think it was possible that a single individual feels she is overqualified or is intimidated by her and complained/whined to the recruiter. This might end up being a molehill, but the recruiter by passing it along, especially at this stage of the game, is making it into a mountain.
IDK if I am explaining this well?
Bucky - keep doing the same great job of learning the company and meeting people and to the extent that you can, try not to let this get to you. (Easier said than done, I know.) GL with the other interview BTW.
Yeah, I'm kind of wondering if it was a person who was intimidated by your eagerness? Certainly, back off a bit, blah, blah, but try to let this roll off your back as much as you can, Bucky. From what you've written, I think you're managing things superbly.
LOL - ok this is what I was trying to say. There could just be one asshole here that is trying to make you feel like shit and this might have absolutely zero to do with you.
I do think talking about becoming an HRBP on day 2 of an admin role is a bit ambitious, and may have been what turned some people. There is "leaning in" but there is also paying your dues. I can see why people would be skeptical of an admin taking about becoming on HRBP so early- even if this role is below your previous one.
I don't think there is anything wrong with that ambition- I've had ambition to become director ASAP since day 1 at my company -- but I didn't share that with anyone until I actually applied for the position. I just made my intentions clear in my actions and how I respond.
Don't fret too much over this. We all make mistakes and I agree this is probably a molehill. Move on, adjust accordingly, and that will show your strength.
Oh Bucky I am so sorry. You have really had a tough row to hoe in the past two years.
Did you ever get that other interview?
This is interesting to me because I was just saying in the other thread that I think @buckybells has been on a great streak! Divorce sucks, of course, but she's in a better relationship because of it. When she wanted out of her house, a buyer showed up before she even listed it. She traveled and had a great time. She lost her job, but she got a package and now has a job plus perhaps another on the way. I don't think it could happen to anyone more deserving, so wrt this, I say don't sweat it. Don't mention it, forget it and try to move past it. Once they get to know you, they will see it was merely enthusiasm and they will let it go. And if it ends up being a temp job, oh well, so swell.
I guess my perspective at this point is like this: I have been so, so fortunate that cards have fallen into place the way they have in the last couple of years. I am the happiest I have ever been in a relationship, and all these tough things have been pretty easy in comparison to others. I feel like I can't complain because everything has been best case scenario.
That said, tonight I feel a bit of change fatigue. There is comfort in understanding your place in the world and knowing you are surrounded by people who know the real you and have been a part of your life long enough that you can trust they have your back. I have a fantastic family, a lot of great friends (most of whom, unfortunately, were coworkers at my last job), and now I have a great Bf who absolutely is there for me, and I am so lucky in that. But I've lost a lot of my history and the people who have shared it in the last couple of years, and that's getting old. Tonight (after writing this) I got super sad because I really, really wish I could have turned to one of my many coworker friends and dissected this conversation, my behaviors at work, etc and then had a bitch session about whoever said whatever. I know that in time I'll have those kinds of relationships with new coworkers, but damn I am sick of having to constantly work at building the future and moving forward and letting it go and accepting that people move in and out of your life.
I think a big emotional part of what I described in my OP is that now I feel like it's going to take a lot longer to build trust with anyone there. It's a relatively small group I work with (about 7 people) and now I feel like I have to watch my back.
Post by lasagnasshole on Aug 27, 2014 21:11:00 GMT -5
@buckybells, don't fret too much about watching your back. Just do good work. Remember that you are thinking about you more than they Re thinking about you. If you are doing good work, this will be a distant memory in a few weeks.
Go pick up The Confidence Code. There's a lot of good information in that book about women tending to dwell on the negative, assuming everyone is thinking about us, etc. I promise you this is a minor setback that is hardly the end of the work.
Chin up, lady. Tomorrow is a new day. Go in, kick some ass, and come home to a glass of wine.
LOL - ok this is what I was trying to say. There could just be one asshole here that is trying to make you feel like shit and this might have absolutely zero to do with you.
(Sorry the quoting was weird so I just C&P'ed.)
Agreed.
I think most of us would be lying if we said that we've never been threatened by a new coworker. I think the others have good points, but I also think it's entirely possible that the problem isn't you, it's some insecurity of others.
I also think it's really hard to know when to sell yourself and when to keep your head down, and in another office, what you did could have been perfect.
Now that you know the environment a little better, I'd tone it down a bit, focus on your job, and in time, you'll figure out the best times to lean in.
I'm sorry. I've cried at my bosses desk before when he implied I didn't want to do my job because I said I didn't want to go to Kansas during a casual lunch conversation. I mean, I hated my job, but it had nothing to do with Kansas.
Hang in there. Just wow them with your awesomeness.
Aw, I'm sorry Bucky. I agree it may have been a little too much too soon, but just back off a bit, do good work, and be enthusiastic about your current role
I agree. It's hard to be a temp. Too much go-get-'em is a concern because you don't want someone to leave or get bored & not enough doesn't get the job done. I'd be enthusiastic about the job in front of you & let your hard work speak for itself. Good luck!
I have basically said I want to work at the company, I took this role to learn about the company and get a foot in the door, and I have XYZ experience, would love to contribute beyond the administrative stuff my role entails, and I'd like to eventually become an HR business partner and hope that this role will help me get there.
I haven't been obnoxious about it IMO - I've said it once to each person who asked - and once to someone who didn't ask
Ok, truth time - if you started this job on Monday and today was Wednesday, then yes I think you might have come on a little strong. There's nothing wrong with ambition, but you have to temper that with meeting the role you were hired into, especially so soon after you've started.
I agree with cosmos - don't beat yourself up, but know that actions speak louder than words. Do a great job most days, an acceptable job the rest, and hopefully opportunity will follow. Good luck, we are all in your corner!
This is a really tough position to be in, where you want to leverage a term job into a full time position. I totally get it because I used to be an on site recruiter.
But, here are some takeaways from reading your OP: You are overqualified The training is boring you (ex: Outlook scheduling) You aren't making enough money to pay your bills You have mentioned to multiple people your desire to do a job different from the one you were hired to do
These are all things that are going to show in your face/body language/attitude that the employer might be picking up on. If you truly feel like you are overqualified and underpaid, that's going to show in your attitude because you are a normal human person with feelings. But it sounds like you aren't fooling anyone.
My advice: don't stay in a job you're overqualified for too long hoping that it will be a stepping stone to better opportunities in the company. At some companies, it's easy to move up quickly and genuinely encouraged. In others, it could be an exercise in futility for a number of reasons beyond your control (and you may be told the same "this is a great way to get your foot in the door and move up!" line in an interview at either type of organization).
For now, cool it on talking about your experience and career goals and show nothing but enthusiasm for your current role. Do everything you can to hide any boredom or frustration. But don't stop looking for something that is a good fit for your current skills and future career goals. Good luck!
Post by countthestars on Aug 28, 2014 8:24:53 GMT -5
This might be a different perspective:
When someone new starts at my company, we (the current employees) often have a quick conversation with HR about how things are going so far and whether we think they will be a good fit. One question that often comes up is "Do you think they will stick around, or are they a flight risk / will they leave?" This gives them an opportunity to make sure they know which new employees might be looking for other jobs - it's not necessarily a bad thing, it's actually a good way to make sure we are giving each employee what they need from us as a company.
Maybe that was the context of the conversation? People want you to stay and think you'd be a great fit but are worried that you will go elsewhere because you are overqualified?
Well, I'm not saying that you shouldn't cool it a little, but I did want to point out that unfortunately, leaning in and succeeding are not the same thing as having everybody love you. I think women often err on the side of timid and don't ask for what they want. I wonder if a man would have gotten the same feedback?
Regardless, just be aware of your message and prove your worth through your work. I definitely would not say you've made a fatal/huge mistake here. Chin up!
When someone new starts at my company, we (the current employees) often have a quick conversation with HR about how things are going so far and whether we think they will be a good fit. One question that often comes up is "Do you think they will stick around, or are they a flight risk / will they leave?" This gives them an opportunity to make sure they know which new employees might be looking for other jobs - it's not necessarily a bad thing, it's actually a good way to make sure we are giving each employee what they need from us as a company.
Maybe that was the context of the conversation? People want you to stay and think you'd be a great fit but are worried that you will go elsewhere because you are overqualified?
I'm not sure if I'm explaining myself correctly.
Well... You are probably right that this was the context I think the comment about me giving the impression it was beneath me is what hurt, because I don't want to behave like a stuck up jerk and that's what I associate with people acting that way, kwim? But you are probably right and I probably overreacted by being upset. I think this new job is stressing me out more than I realized because I rarely get emotional like that!
Also to clarify... I work in recruiting so that's why the recruiter was involved! I realized my story maybe makes less sense without that detail, lol. I actually work FOR the recruiter
Well, I'm not saying that you shouldn't cool it a little, but I did want to point out that unfortunately, leaning in and succeeding are not the same thing as having everybody love you. I think women often err on the side of timid and don't ask for what they want. I wonder if a man would have gotten the same feedback?
Regardless, just be aware of your message and prove your worth through your work. I definitely would not say you've made a fatal/huge mistake here. Chin up!
Frankly, I wondered this too. I have gotten feedback from coworker friends in the past that I need to be more direct and advocate more for myself to get opportunities... So that's what I am trying. It is hard to do that and not turn people off! I think I would be less concerned with being liked if I didn't feel like I was still auditioning for an actual job. I feel like at this point impressions and likeability are critical because who is going to commit to a teammate you don't like?
And honestly, I am rarely the person people want as a bff but I am also generally well liked. I am nice and don't give people reasons to dislike me, so I have never needed a thick skin. Maybe I need to develop one if I ever want to move forward!
Thanks everyone for the feedback. I think all the relevant parties know my intentions now, so I am going to shut my mouth, smile as much as I can, and work hard to show them what I can do. I feel less emotional today and that helps. I appreciate you all!