biglaw - panicking about reviews

[alias123]

I'm having kind of a panic attack right now and need someone to tell me to breathe.

I've always been anxious about reviews coming up around the corner, and in past years its been totally unfounded anxiety.

And now that reviews will be happening in a few weeks again, I've convinced myself that somehow I'm going to get fired. I think this is partially fueled by how I am in the middle of buying a new home (still haven't sold current one), and that is making me even more nervous than usual.

Add on that partners that don't particularly like to give good feedback in general.

Does anyone else feel like this? If I get fired they will give me a decent severance package right? Got 2 kids at home and my husband is a SAHD so that adds to my anxiety about what we would do if something happened.

Hoping this anxiety is really just paranoia.

[kadams767]

I'm not BigLaw but for years, I had major anxiety surrounding reviews. Similar to you, I actually convinced myself that I was going to get fired. Obviously, I don't know your circumstances, but my fears were completely irrational and totally unfounded. I mean, I was up at night I would be so upset that I was going to get let go, but there was absolutely NOTHING to base that on other than my own neurosis. It was completely, 100% irrational and honestly, looking back, I must have sounded like a loon (I cried about my review again this year and was made partner, if it tells you anything about how wrong I was).
Do you have any (real, not fabricated in your own head) reason to think the review could be negative or you might lose your job? If not, I would try to stop thinking about it. Either way, there isn't much you can do now to change the review coming up within the next few weeks, you know?

[Deleted]

Can you make a list of all of your accomplishments/ the things you rocked in the last year? I find this to be helpful in making me more confident.

[thedutchgirl]

It is notoriously hard to be fired from BigLaw! I am sure your imagination is running away from you. Are you meeting or exceeding your hours? Are you still getting work from partners? If yes, you are fine. They lay a LOT of groundwork before firing someone. You would know if you were in any danger.

[alias123]

To answer a few questions---

-I find it so hard to list my accomplishments because I feel like the partners always put a slightly negative spin on things (not to extrapolate further).
-Yes, I'm still getting work, yes I met my hours (although they were not as high as in previous years because I was on maternity leave for the first part of the billing year this year.

Thanks for calming my nerves a bit ...

[mlt]

So many hugs!!!! I do this too at review time. It's horrible. What has helped is looking around at all the lazy losers who are a year or two ahead of me and are STILL THERE despite bad reviews, bad reputations, and bad attitudes. My firm does not fire people. They just don't. They do give "the talk" when it's time to move on. But they give you an extra year or so even after that!!! So you would have a lot of notice. I am always prepared to say "I'm already looking" if I do get "the talk." Worked for a friend of mine. He got called in and told to start thinking about his "next steps." He said he was already looking and the partner cheerfully connected my friend with a client. Now my friend has a sweet in-house gig. You will not get fired!

[h]

Sept 15, 2014 21:07:07 GMT -5 thedutchgirl said:

It is notoriously hard to be fired from BigLaw! I am sure your imagination is running away from you. Are you meeting or exceeding your hours? Are you still getting work from partners? If yes, you are fine. They lay a LOT of groundwork before firing someone. You would know if you were in any danger.

All this. I really think they would have given you some indication if you were in trouble to the point of being fired. Everyone I have known at my firm who has been fired was in a situation where the writing was very much on the wall--warnings about hours given out, being told it would be in their best interest to start exploring other options, etc. They are not going to fire a woman recently back from maternity leave without having laid the groundwork.

That said, I know how easy it is to doubt yourself, especially when you spend all your time working with partners who never give positive feedback. Big law can be a mindfuck. But I seriously doubt you are in danger of losing your job.

[WOT?*]

Sept 15, 2014 21:41:34 GMT -5 alias123 said:

To answer a few questions---

-I find it so hard to list my accomplishments because I feel like the partners always put a slightly negative spin on things (not to extrapolate further).
-Yes, I'm still getting work, yes I met my hours (although they were not as high as in previous years because I was on maternity leave for the first part of the billing year this year.

Thanks for calming my nerves a bit ...

They will account for this. Your hours should be modified to reflect the time off for maternity (which is protected) leave. It is at DH's biglaw firm and most others as far as I am aware.  If they're giving you work and haven't pulled you in, PIPed you, pulled assignments, etc. then you're fine. And don't let their negativity turn you negative. I'm sure they're not as negative as you think...but your insecurities are making you focus on the negative rather than the positive comments and positive results that have come out of these meetings in the past. It sucks that they use negative comments rather than positive reinforcement and reassurance but they're guys, they're lawyers and they're partners.  Three strikes against them right there.   You've done well in the past and you will continue to do well. Focus on that.

[cilantro]

Sept 16, 2014 12:37:41 GMT -5 @littlemoxie said:

Sept 15, 2014 21:07:07 GMT -5 thedutchgirl said:

It is notoriously hard to be fired from BigLaw! I am sure your imagination is running away from you. Are you meeting or exceeding your hours? Are you still getting work from partners? If yes, you are fine. They lay a LOT of groundwork before firing someone. You would know if you were in any danger.

WHAT?!  Tell that the hundreds laid off in 2008-2009.

ETA:  Sorry if that came out like you need to be worried.  I think those days of mass layoffs are done, and think you are in a different scenario (good hours, recent maternity leave, etc).  I was only responding to the general assertion that it is SO HARD to be fired from BigLaw.  I can't believe anyone would think that post 2009.  Especially with all of the mergers recently where they may have too many lawyers in one practice area.

Haha, yeah, GOD I would love to believe that but really don't think it's true.  Shit happens all of the time.  To OP, I just offer sympathies.  I'm also BigLaw, and am on clomid this cycle hoping to conceive my second and reviews are around the corner.  Oh, and I most certainly did not make hours. 

[RandZB]

Sept 16, 2014 12:37:41 GMT -5 @littlemoxie said:

Sept 15, 2014 21:07:07 GMT -5 thedutchgirl said:

It is notoriously hard to be fired from BigLaw! I am sure your imagination is running away from you. Are you meeting or exceeding your hours? Are you still getting work from partners? If yes, you are fine. They lay a LOT of groundwork before firing someone. You would know if you were in any danger.

WHAT?!  Tell that the hundreds laid off in 2008-2009.

ETA:  Sorry if that came out like you need to be worried.  I think those days of mass layoffs are done, and think you are in a different scenario (good hours, recent maternity leave, etc).  I was only responding to the general assertion that it is SO HARD to be fired from BigLaw.  I can't believe anyone would think that post 2009.  Especially with all of the mergers recently where they may have too many lawyers in one practice area.

My BigLaw firm just let staff members go for failing to complete a series of web-based tutorials and knowledge checks in the given amount of time. Granted, that amount of time was several weeks so if they couldn't get it done then that's on them, but when we were a boutique litigation firm you had to be a literal crackhead to get fired. As in, the last firing was a paralegal who was actually on crack. I figure as long as I get my work done and stay off crack, I should be okay.

[alias123]

Sept 16, 2014 13:03:54 GMT -5 cilantro said:

Sept 16, 2014 12:37:41 GMT -5 @littlemoxie said:

WHAT?!  Tell that the hundreds laid off in 2008-2009.

ETA:  Sorry if that came out like you need to be worried.  I think those days of mass layoffs are done, and think you are in a different scenario (good hours, recent maternity leave, etc).  I was only responding to the general assertion that it is SO HARD to be fired from BigLaw.  I can't believe anyone would think that post 2009.  Especially with all of the mergers recently where they may have too many lawyers in one practice area.

Haha, yeah, GOD I would love to believe that but really don't think it's true.  Shit happens all of the time.  To OP, I just offer sympathies.  I'm also BigLaw, and am on clomid this cycle hoping to conceive my second and reviews are around the corner.  Oh, and I most certainly did not make hours. 

Do you think even when "Shit happens all the time" it is still generally practice to give someone "the talk" suggesting they might be better suited elsewhere and then give them plenty of time before actually firing them? No special situation here - no mergers etc, generally good hours in my practice group etc.

Good luck on TTC #2 and with your reviews. 

[cilantro]

Sept 16, 2014 13:23:23 GMT -5 alias123 said:

Sept 16, 2014 13:03:54 GMT -5 cilantro said:

Haha, yeah, GOD I would love to believe that but really don't think it's true.  Shit happens all of the time.  To OP, I just offer sympathies.  I'm also BigLaw, and am on clomid this cycle hoping to conceive my second and reviews are around the corner.  Oh, and I most certainly did not make hours. 

Do you think even when "Shit happens all the time" it is still generally practice to give someone "the talk" suggesting they might be better suited elsewhere and then give them plenty of time before actually firing them? No special situation here - no mergers etc, generally good hours in my practice group etc.

Good luck on TTC #2 and with your reviews. 

Yes.  I just worry that 'the talk' is reserved for review times.

[v]

Sept 16, 2014 13:23:23 GMT -5 alias123 said:

Sept 16, 2014 13:03:54 GMT -5 cilantro said:

Haha, yeah, GOD I would love to believe that but really don't think it's true.  Shit happens all of the time.  To OP, I just offer sympathies.  I'm also BigLaw, and am on clomid this cycle hoping to conceive my second and reviews are around the corner.  Oh, and I most certainly did not make hours. 

Do you think even when "Shit happens all the time" it is still generally practice to give someone "the talk" suggesting they might be better suited elsewhere and then give them plenty of time before actually firing them? No special situation here - no mergers etc, generally good hours in my practice group etc.

Good luck on TTC #2 and with your reviews. 

It depends.  Some firms still seem to be doing "the talk" well ahead of when they expect you to leave, but I also know people who have gotten the "we think you start looking for a new job... today... and your last day at the firm is 3 months from now" talk, even outside of mass layoffs.  I think firms are less polite about letting people hang around in the post-2009 world.

That said, it sounds like you just have a general anxiety here and not a specific reason to worry, so I wouldn't worry!  

[thedutchgirl]

Sept 16, 2014 12:37:41 GMT -5 @littlemoxie said:

Sept 15, 2014 21:07:07 GMT -5 thedutchgirl said:

It is notoriously hard to be fired from BigLaw! I am sure your imagination is running away from you. Are you meeting or exceeding your hours? Are you still getting work from partners? If yes, you are fine. They lay a LOT of groundwork before firing someone. You would know if you were in any danger.

WHAT?!  Tell that the hundreds laid off in 2008-2009.

ETA:  Sorry if that came out like you need to be worried.  I think those days of mass layoffs are done, and think you are in a different scenario (good hours, recent maternity leave, etc).  I was only responding to the general assertion that it is SO HARD to be fired from BigLaw.  I can't believe anyone would think that post 2009.  Especially with all of the mergers recently where they may have too many lawyers in one practice area.

Well, sure, I agree. I'm not saying that doesn't and can't happen. But that didn't sound like the sort of concern OP had, which seemed to be more that they don't like her and might get rid of her--anxiety surrounding review time.

Every place is different, of course, but I do think you often still get some warning. And I would argue even that the talk and 3 months is a LOT of time. More than you'd get in most industries.

[alias123]

So - I had my review and it went perfectly fine. I need to stop being such a crazy person about reviews.