I am kind of rolling my eyes at some of the responses implying that it's fine if you are going abroad, but not --gasp-- Disney. And we usually use daycare for my kids school breaks and it's not always a given that I can take vacation time during their breaks. Really, if we were to take a vacation, I am not going to be held hostage by a school schedule the next 12+ years. It's doesn't mean I don't value education.
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I mentioned family commitments abroad just because its unlikely I would take my kids anywhere that's longer than a 2 or 3 hour flight away and in a radically different time zone for just a weekend. But since I am on the East coast, Disney would be very doable over one of the shorter school breaks DD gets, like teacher development days that happen before a holiday Monday (like Columbus Day or MLK). Color me clueless, but I still don't get why Disney necessarily has to be a 7 or 10 day extravaganza.
We went to Disney quite a few times when I was a kid and we never went for that long. The longest I can remember is 4 full days, and one of those times was recently. We became experts at doing most of Disney in 3 days. We even did 3-4 day trips to Hawaii and that's a pretty long flight! It was mostly because my parents didn't want to take me out of school for more than a couple days. We also didn't do the regular breaks because we flew standby (only reason we took so many trips!). I think a few days is totally reasonable.
Post by curbsideprophet on Sept 17, 2014 20:19:37 GMT -5
I think some of you are making this a bigger deal than it really is.
I completely understanding wanting to go during off peak times. I also understand wanting to go as an entire family. I think it is silly to suggest that OP just go without her DH like that is the obvious choice. Sure it is an option, but that plan has a lot of flaws as well. Disney is expensive and could very well be a once in a lifetime trip for someone. If going at an off time works better for you, go for it. Also, who wants to go to Orlando in the summer? I certainly do not.
I think travel and family vacations have value in and of themselves, even if the trip itself is not considered educational. I think your kid is much more likely to remember the experience of the vacation than what they did in second grade any given week. Are they really learning something so important that it can not be made up? Unlikely.
If your kid is struggling it might not be the best idea. If your kid is going to end up being held back and forced to repeat the grade then maybe you should reconsider. Otherwise, I don't see a week long trip every once in awhile making or breaking a kids entire future. Especially when they are still in elementary school. We are way too focused on freaking test scores, it is ridiculous.
Post by lizlemon19 on Sept 17, 2014 20:21:55 GMT -5
I would only miss maybe two full days. DS1 gets very frustrated if he is behind or missing out. Then I would worry if he got sick or injured and had to be out 5 days or so, and then would miss a lot. I then have to think about using my vacation time, and having to take some days off for their scheduled vacation.
My IL's were mad and thought I was being ridiculous that I wouldn't take DS out school for a week to go to CA.
I think some of you are making this a bigger deal than it really is.
I completely understanding wanting to go during off peak times. I also understand wanting to go as an entire family. I think it is silly to suggest that OP just go without her DH like that is the obvious choice.
I think it's silly to pretend your 6-year-old is just going to die because he/she is the only one among their friends who isn't going to Disney and that the reason is "because Daddy's job sucks." Hence my response.
So many variables. But I'm leaning toward yes. My mom took me out of school for a week when I was 9 to go to Europe. The pros way out weighed the cons. Not something that would happen all the time though.
Post by Dumbledork on Sept 17, 2014 20:52:41 GMT -5
Our school has a policy of 10 unexcused absences and then they call social services or something. So if she's sick and misses a few days, a few times over the year, and I forget to send a note the day she returns, not the next day or any other day but the very day she returns, asking for it to be excused, I'm screwed.
I think there's a state law involved with the number of absences as well. It's weird.
It's a choice (charter) school and they take attendance very serious, so no. We won't skip. We had planned on it for a wedding that's happening cross country, got wind of how serious the school is on attendance, and had to cancel our plans.
It's a huge PITA for me as a teacher when kids miss days of school, especially when I am asked/expected to either provide and grade extra work for them or try to catch them up when they get back. So I vote no, because I wouldn't do that to my colleagues.
Moot point though since I can't take the days off of school either and they go to my school.
"Hello babies. Welcome to Earth. It's hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It's round and wet and crowded. On the outside, babies, you've got a hundred years here. There's only one rule that I know of, babies-"God damn it, you've got to be kind.”
My mom was a teacher. MIL was a teacher. Two of my aunts were teachers.
So no. I'm pretty sure Grandma and Nana would not be happy if DS missed school for a vacation.
I was raised that you go to school unless you're puking or running a high fever. Same with DH. I think this both helped us be responsible students once we went to college.
Of course no one should blame the other spouse's job on, well, anything, but it's blowing my mind that people are "tralala just go without DH!" That just wouldn't happen for us. We would work with school and DH's job to ensure a vacation for our entire family without leaving anyone out. Whether it was Disney or Europe.
So basically I change my wishy washy answer. Yes, I would do this, OP. lol
Ah, see, it's blowing my mind that people are clutching their pearls over traveling without their DH. My father worked all the time, and I went on many a spring vacation with just my mom and brother. I have already taken one big trip alone with DD and will likely do another next year. Obviously, I prefer when H comes along, and he can, for maybe our big trip, if we take one.
Different strokes, man.
So if the OP can make that happen by going during the school year, I don't think it is that big of a deal. To only consider vacation during breaks/summer just seems short sighted.
Post by water*drop on Sept 17, 2014 21:43:19 GMT -5
Yes. Not all the time, and only if they are good students, but yes. I learned so much traveling growing up, even on just-for-fun trips. They enhanced my classroom education. I work in formal education, so I obviously value it a lot. I wouldn't pull my kid(s) if I doubted their ability to keep up, but there really is more to life than formal education.
But I am biased by my own experiences - I missed school for a vacation a couple of times (once for Disney!!1!11!). I am the biggest workaholic ever and regularly take classes just for fun, so clearly I managed to keep my strong work ethic and love of learning despite getting to skip class to go see some princesses and a mouse. Would that work for every student? Not necessarily. But it will work for some, so I really think this needs to be considered on a case-by-case basis.
yes I would. there is so much downtime in school. When my kids were out for a week for a family wedding, we did all of the week's work in one day. this is younger elementary.
My kids have no downtime in school. To the point it is nuts. A lot of the work is a pain to make-up also. I hate it when the kids are out sick for a day. It is too much.
Exactly. I wouldn't voluntarily pull my kids from school because they will miss so much in just a couple days. If they're in preschool, sure, we've done that. But once they're in elementary school, they have to squeeze so much into such a short amount of time. All of this "my parents did it when I was a kid!" is nonsense because back then there weren't the same educational pressures that exist today. It makes me sad for my kids, but I'm not going to let my nostalgia interfere with their education.
I work in a school and people do it all the time. They try to schedule it obviously over a long weekend so they're only missing 3 days or so. My schools policy is "5 days without prior administrative consent."
This is one of those "only on the internet do people stress about this" issues.
I disagree because depending on the district, there are some real and strict consequences.
I agree with chilerellanos in disagreeing with @justdairy -- in fact, I first learned about excused vs. unexcused absences a couple years ago in a REAL LIFE discussion with a friend who wanted to have her daughters skip a day to go to WDW.
Our school district's policy specifically states that "Vacation is not considered an urgent reason for absence from school," which makes it unexcused and therefore UNLAWFUL in our state.
Post by MadamePresident on Sept 17, 2014 22:42:43 GMT -5
I would but I was homeschool so it was no big deal to take school work with us. My parents lived in a town about 2 hours away for couple months when my dad had a job there and my mom just did school as usual.
I think some of you are making this a bigger deal than it really is.
I completely understanding wanting to go during off peak times. I also understand wanting to go as an entire family. I think it is silly to suggest that OP just go without her DH like that is the obvious choice.
I think it's silly to pretend your 6-year-old is just going to die because he/she is the only one among their friends who isn't going to Disney and that the reason is "because Daddy's job sucks." Hence my response.
I mentioned family commitments abroad just because its unlikely I would take my kids anywhere that's longer than a 2 or 3 hour flight away and in a radically different time zone for just a weekend. But since I am on the East coast, Disney would be very doable over one of the shorter school breaks DD gets, like teacher development days that happen before a holiday Monday (like Columbus Day or MLK). Color me clueless, but I still don't get why Disney necessarily has to be a 7 or 10 day extravaganza.
Some of us are on the West Coast. Even traveling to my parents in the mid-West is basically 1/2+ day of travel each way making a trip over a 3 day weekend very very short. It is the thing I miss most about living on the East Coast - it was so much easier to take short jaunts. Keeping with a 2-3 hr flight and same/similar time zone really limits the number of places we can go vs say living back in NYC.
Fair enough. I was just explaining why I made the Europe/travel abroad distinction.
Yes. I work in a school and people do it all the time. They try to schedule it obviously over a long weekend so they're only missing 3 days or so. My schools policy is "5 days without prior administrative consent."
This is one of those "only on the internet do people stress about this" issues.
Yeah we try to do things like this. We're taking the kids to Fisney World next year over Thanksgiving. The boys will miss two days of school.
For those who say no, or that you have very strict school districts, when do you take a family vacation? Like, when would you go to disney?
Summer isn't an option for us due to work schedues and all our other school off weeks fall over holidays that would make it impractical to be on vacation.
Well, I wouldn't do a Disney trip.
We would always take family vacations in the summer. DC, swimming camp in Alabama with some extra days over to Atlanta, visiting family in CA, Chicago, Boston/NYC, etc. My mom was also not adverse to doing vacation things over holidays, but we were always skiing.
I think if I really wanted to do a play vacation the only time I would do it would be spring break. Sucks becasue of the money due to high season, but at least there usually isn't a holiday to contend with.
DW in the summer or over spring break sounds like hell to me, sorry. Lol. I would never go then. We went over president's day weekend lady year (we get a week off for it in NY) and the crowds/temp were bad enough. As it is, I'm kind of apprehensive about being there over Thanksgiving. I have a feeling it's going to be really busy.
Guys, are 6th graders REALLY going to get that much out of seeing the white house? I get that its technically educational, but come on now. I'm not seeing this crazy difference between that vacation and Disney. ETA: from what a kid will truly take away from the vacation I mean
But then again chilerellanos and I are just those crazy Disney people
Seriously! I'm sure we'll take our kids to "educational" places (I loved Colonial Williamsburg and the Jamestown fort for instance) but we're waiting until they actually want to do those things and will get something out of it. No way am I going to fly across the Atlantic with three whiny kids if they're not going to let me step foot inside an interesting museum or church.
Also I'm kind of feeling irresponsible now. DH's work has a retreat every year to the Don Caesar in St. Pete Beach. The kids have never been old enough/manageable enough for us to go too but when they are, I was planning to take them along. It's usually in March so they'd have to miss school. But I thought it would be a nice way to make some family memories. It's a gorgeous hotel.
My mom used to wake me up once or twice a school year and ask if I had a test that day. If I said no, she'd say, "Great. Let's have a girl day!" I remember those days with such happiness and I'll do that with C too.
This sounds awesome! That is the kind of thing a child would remember long afterwards.
Oh I forgot. I missed two days in 4th grade to go to Colonial Williamsburg. LOL. What I learned on that trip - my brother had poor coping skills, as he cried and sulked on the front stoop of a shop because my parents would not buy him the bowie knife he wanted. We took a picture (of him).
We went when I was 12 or so which would have made my brother 7ish. There are several pictures of him crying there in our family album. He was (literally) bored to tears, lol.
I think it's silly to pretend your 6-year-old is just going to die because he/she is the only one among their friends who isn't going to Disney and that the reason is "because Daddy's job sucks." Hence my response.
Of course no one should blame the other spouse's job on, well, anything, but it's blowing my mind that people are "tralala just go without DH!" That just wouldn't happen for us. We would work with school and DH's job to ensure a vacation for our entire family without leaving anyone out. Whether it was Disney or Europe.
So basically I change my wishy washy answer. Yes, I would do this, OP. lol
I think taking a 6 yo, 4 yo, and a 2 yo to DW by myself would land me in the loony bin. Literally, lol. I was kind of thinking about taking them along when DH has his work retreat this year (he has meetings during the day but would be free at night so it would be just me taking them to the beach/pool every day) and he looked at me, like, have you LOST YOUR MIND, lol. And I was like, oh yeah. Maybe next year
I voted yes, but it will depend on what kind of students the girls end up being. My brother and I were always straight A students with very little effort. It wouldn't have been an issue for us to miss at all. My sister struggled with school and a week out would have really been an issue. If they both are strong students then I would have no problem doing it, even for Disney. It's not only the crowds that make going on peak times a pain, it's also the cost. It's more expensive, and then you're paying extra to wait on long lines and likely not get to do everything. If I can go at a time when there are less lines and it's cheaper and we feel that the educational impact will be minimal then why not? If they had any issues catching up we would never do it again. I also would not take a full week once we get past elementary school.
The idea that taking my kids out for vacation makes me irresponsible or them not responsible students or is making us give our kids a mixed message about the importance of school is laughable. When I miss work I have to make work up. I don't go on vacation and think "oh well, work isn't important, someone else will handle it". I plan ahead and make things up when I get back. My children will be taught the same thing. School is their job, and if they are going to miss it they will come with us to meet with their teachers before hand to discuss it and anything they can do during vacation, and then again afterwards to see what they need to do to catch up. While not the point of vacation at all, it can be used as an opportunity to teach responsibility and honoring commitments.
Yes, even for Disney. My parents pulled us out for 2 weeks total every year. They both worked 80+ hrs a week in the summer so it was the only way we could do family vacations. The teachers gave us the work we were going to miss and we always came back ahead of the rest of the class. We didn't stop till we were well in to high school and commitments to sports teams got in the way.
I'd have no problem with it. But it seems silly as a 2 parent working household to take them out if school for a trip and then send them to daycare during spring break just to avoid the crowds. But I'm also one of those parents who only send kids to daycare when necessary.
Post by catsarecute on Sept 18, 2014 9:29:53 GMT -5
As long as the student was good at keeping up with their work and didn't struggle in the classroom, I would be fine with it. My dad did the Ironman Triathlon in Hawaii every year when I was in elementary school so we missed a week of school to go to Hawaii for the week. We had huge packets of homework and had to spend time while we were there finishing our assignments for the day. I did this from 1st to 6th grade.
Several students that I work with miss a couple of weeks to go to Mexico to see family members in addition to the time they get off for holidays.