Post by dreamcrisp1 on Sept 18, 2014 13:27:26 GMT -5
So, I'm a nanny. When I was hired, I was told the children were the primary responsibility and light housekeeping was ideal. I have no problem with this.
However, every few days, more and more is getting added to my list.
1) she made a list of weekly and daily chores for me but most of it is not possible because I simply don't have the time.
2) she wants things like bathroom cleaning, changing the bedsheets, etc.
3) she only pays me 15$ which considering minimum wage is almost 12$, that is not a lot.
My schedule looks like this:
I arrive at 3:00. The kids come home from school at 3:40. I have to make sure dinner is ready, make their lunches for the next day, I usually wash fruit for breakfast for the next morning. I will do a quick swiffer of the kitchen and check the laundry room for laundry. Once the kids are home, I give them dinner and every night, they have french reading, English reading, extra math, and piano. We're usually done by 5:30/6:00 depending on how cooperative and speedy they are. I leave at 6.
What would you do? What would you say? Am I being unreasonable to expect that is a lot of work to add on top d all that I do.
I'll upload a picture of her daily and weekly chores.
Oh and she created a checklist with boxes for me which downright annoyed me. But that might just be me...
Post by countthestars on Sept 18, 2014 13:31:42 GMT -5
I would say "I have found that I do not have the time between 3-6 to do all of the things listed. Could you help me prioritize which are the most important?"
Then you can help her understand what you are doing from 3-3:40 (prepping dinner, making lunches) and what your day looks like once the kids get home.
I think her expectations are unreasonable for you only have 40min. How long have you worked for them? I would just be up front with her and tell her there is no way you can do every chore she is wanting. Our nanny only does kid related things like kids laundry, changing their sheets, make food for them. She will also load/unload the dishwasher and vacuum the main living area. She would probably do more but I don't ask her to. And she is there all day and has a few hours by herself while they are in school so occasionally she will run an errand or go to the grocery store for me.
Post by dancingirl21 on Sept 18, 2014 13:34:30 GMT -5
My nanny doesn't do all that in a 10 hour day. It seems like her expectations are a little out of line. I agree with PP who suggested you ask what the priorities are.
Post by drloretta on Sept 18, 2014 13:36:41 GMT -5
We currently have a FT person and her only job is getting DD to and from school and making sure she's fed. Most of the time we have something in the fridge for her to heat up.
We're going to a PT person in a couple of weeks. Her job will be to pick up DD, entertain her, and hang out until we get home. No other chores, unless I decided to pay her more. I wouldn't want her touching my sheets, etc.
I would say "I have found that I do not have the time between 3-6 to do all of the things listed. Could you help me prioritize which are the most important?"
Then you can help her understand what you are doing from 3-3:40 (prepping dinner, making lunches) and what your day looks like once the kids get home.
I would jot down what you get done each day and how long it takes you, then show her the list and follow the advice above. I would also emphasize, "If I have housework on my list, that takes [amount of time] away from what I spend on the children's homework help and meal prep" so that it doesn't just appear as "laziness" to her.
Sorry. Sounds like she's trying to add you on as a housekeeper so that she doesn't have to pay someone else. If you're willing to do the work, then maybe you could tell her that you can stay for another hour or two to get the housework done if she can increase your pay by $x.
Do you have a contract or anything? I would tell her that your agreement included light housekeeping and tell her what your 40 minutes entails and say that if she wants you to be able to do those things she'll need to pay you more money and probably add on extra hours in the day (if you want to do it).
Do you have a contract or anything? I would tell her that your agreement included light housekeeping and tell her what your 40 minutes entails and say that if she wants you to be able to do those things she'll need to pay you more money and probably add on extra hours in the day (if you want to do it).
No contract but I do have a copy of the job posting which says It all.
I would say "I have found that I do not have the time between 3-6 to do all of the things listed. Could you help me prioritize which are the most important?"
Then you can help her understand what you are doing from 3-3:40 (prepping dinner, making lunches) and what your day looks like once the kids get home.
I really like this approach. It will make you come off as very professional and allows you to have a real conversation about future expectations.
I have worked in people's houses to do therapy with kids who have nannies. The only nannies I know that did that amount of work were ones who were there all day and/or the kids took a significantly long nap!
Like PPs said, let her know you don't think you'll be able to get to all of it and ask her to help you prioritize. Maybe you can be specific and say "okay between 3-3:40 I should be able to do a,b c, then when the kids are doing homework I'll try to get to x,y,z. If the kids don't need help with homework x and y should be manageable, but if they need help then z might not happen."
I would just start looking for a new job. She has to know this can't be done in the time, and likely doesn't care. Our nanny's only required task is to take care of the kids. I ask for other things from time to time but make it clear that of they don't get done it's fine. Our nanny has worked for us for 4 years and seems happy.
I would just start looking for a new job. She has to know this can't be done in the time, and likely doesn't care. Our nanny's only required task is to take care of the kids. I ask for other things from time to time but make it clear that of they don't get done it's fine. Our nanny has worked for us for 4 years and seems happy.
This.
Even if you talk to her about expectations and what can and can't be accomplished in the 3 hour time frame, it seems as if she will find a way to make it seem like you are at fault. Maybe that isn't the case and she is a really nice person who just doesn't get it, but I doubt she is that clueless?
Post by dexteroni on Sept 18, 2014 18:33:02 GMT -5
Changing sheets and cleaning bathrooms doesn't sound like light housework to me. And there's no way you can get those done in the 40 minutes you have before the kids come home, since it sounds like you have other stuff to do during that time. And there's more on the list than those two things? Yeah no way. A checklist would piss me off too, because that makes it sound like an expectation, not an "if there's time" kind of thing (which there isn't).
If you're willing to work more hours, you could offer to come at 2:00 instead of 3:00 or whatever works for you. But IMO nannies are nannies, and housekeepers are housekeepers, and they're trained in two different professions. Asking you to do the duties of a housekeeper is a sign that she doesn't respect what you do. Some nannies do both, but that's not what you were hired for, nor were you given enough hours to do those tasks, even if you wanted to.
Because of that, I think I would be kind of disenchanted with this job. Maybe one of her friends put a bug in her ear that she should ask more of the nanny. Or maybe she's just a jerk who wants something for nothing. But I don't even have kids, and I don't think I could do the housework and make dinner in 40 minutes a day. It's such an unreasonable request.
I hope she's receptive to your concerns. If she isn't, or if she says she is but you aren't confident that she means it, I would also probably start looking for another job.
I would just start looking for a new job. She has to know this can't be done in the time, and likely doesn't care. Our nanny's only required task is to take care of the kids. I ask for other things from time to time but make it clear that of they don't get done it's fine. Our nanny has worked for us for 4 years and seems happy.
All of this. I think the fact that you get as much done as you do is impressive. I do not have a nanny but use a sitter about 10 hours a week and I specifically tell her not to worry about housework. I think you can find a better arrangement.
I'm in the look for a new job camp. She is trying to get you to be a housekeeper which is not why you were hired. The checklist is just the beginning of her demands, she will notch it up. I don't think money is the big issue it is the time to do her chores.
Post by pacificrules on Sept 18, 2014 22:48:56 GMT -5
I like the idea of offering to increase your hours to be sure to get to more things on the list. It sounds like she needs the help. BUT for her to expect you to do that much while being with the kids and prepping the food that you do is WAY unrealistic.
Post by dreamcrisp1 on Sept 18, 2014 23:04:41 GMT -5
It's not possible to increase my hours. I'm a full time student and I work in the day as well. Part of accepting this position was the hours (3 hours) for extra money and the fact that it was pretty much just working with the kids and helping them out with homework. They need 100% supervision during Hwk time which is fine with me.
Post by pacificrules on Sept 18, 2014 23:08:59 GMT -5
Well, in that case, asking her to help you prioritize or just simply stating the amount you're able to get done is the way to go. It sounds like a frustrating situation. Sorry! :/
It's not possible to increase my hours. I'm a full time student and I work in the day as well. Part of accepting this position was the hours (3 hours) for extra money and the fact that it was pretty much just working with the kids and helping them out with homework. They need 100% supervision during Hwk time which is fine with me.
Since this is an extra job, are you able/willing to quit if she won't be reasonable? If so, that enables you to stand your ground a bit more firmly (nicely, of course).
How did today go? Did you mention anything about the additional work?
Hopefully there's some misunderstanding or miscommunication on her part at play here. I was thinking that maybe the checklist is more for her, so she knows what she (and her spouse if she's married) have left to do, not that she's expecting you to do it all.
Giving her the benefit of the doubt... Is it a checklist for the house so she can see what still needs doing and she can check things off too? That would be a logical yet non-offensive interpretation of it.
You have 40 minutes every day, but if the kids finish early you have 30 more minutes available by your description. I think it's fair to expect you to do something then and it's not crazy for her to give you a prioritized list. It is crazy if she thinks that this is a list that you will absolutely accomplish every day and every week.
Post by mollybrown on Sept 19, 2014 0:59:46 GMT -5
I actually think it's ridiculous to ask the nanny to clean the bathrooms or change linens at all. Those are not tasks that are compatible with supervising children, at all. I would expect a nanny to be responsible for the children first and foremost, and to be able to handle cleaning tasks that can be multitasked in the same room with the kids. Dishes, folding laundry, wiping down counters, quick sweeping/mopping of common area floors, etc. Unless you plan to make the kids sit in the bedroom or bathroom while you clean, there would be a significant amount of time that they wouldn't be engaged.
The going rate in my area for cleaning alone is more like $30 an hour and up. I would expect a higher wage if she wants you to take care of the kids AND do serious cleaning. My cleaners probably could have done sheets and a bathroom in 40 minutes, but they worked HARD. You have to figure out if it's worth the $8 or so you'd make in that 40 minutes, and then you'd have to multitask cooking and helping with homework.
Post by bryantpark on Sept 19, 2014 3:06:20 GMT -5
I would tell her to stay home a few days and see if she can accomplish all of that between 3-6. Sounds totally unreasonable. That is also a hard time of day for kids and mine are usually extra needy.
Post by dreamcrisp1 on Sept 19, 2014 8:07:33 GMT -5
I'd definitely be wlilling to quit if she isn't reasonable or understanding. From what she said, she got a nanny because she was exhausted having to do all this stuff (dinners, lunches, homework) every day (and she had all evening to do it). So she has to understand that it's not possible to get it all done in that time frame.
Like yesterday, I finished all the stuff at 5:55. I didn't even have any time to vaccum or mop or even go upstairs in the house because I had to fully prep dinner for the kids.
The checklist seems to be what she wants me to do everyday. I have a picture but I can't upload from my phone. The daily ones are split into days and the weekly ones has one box. Ah.
Post by dexteroni on Sept 19, 2014 12:08:47 GMT -5
I agree, she has to realize that if she couldn't do it all in a 4 or 5 hour evening, you certainly can't do it in 3 hours. Hopefully she'll be cool about it and realize that what she really needs to do is hire a housekeeper for the cleaning and let you focus on the kids. I hope she didn't price out housekeepers and think "I'll just get dreamcrisp to do it for less." Good luck!
Post by jennistarr1 on Sept 19, 2014 12:46:43 GMT -5
I have a different issue...I may simply argue that cleaning bathroom is not "light cleaning"...so when it comes that you may say, I will wipe down the counter but not scrub toilets or clean tubs. You could negotiate so many hours of housekeeping, but of course, billed at a different rate more similar to what it would be for her to hire a house cleaner.