Calculating weight gain during pregnancy

[CrazyLucky]

This came up again recently because I give DH a hard time about it, but the incident is 4 years old and there is no animus about it at all.
When I was pregnant with DS, I was super sick the first trimester, and lost 12 pounds.  Then I gained it back, plus 20 more pounds.  So for example, if I was 150, I went down to 138, and eventually up to 170.  If some insensitive, no filter person (say, your mom) asked how much weight you gained, would you say 20 pounds or 32 pounds?

I said 20 pounds.  DH corrected me to say 32 pounds.  Regardless of whether you would have said 20 or 32 pounds, what is the correct punishment here?  I went with death stare, followed by years of teasing him about what an insensitive jerk he was.

[soozy87]

I would say that I gained 20 pounds from where I started. Either way your husband was an insensitive jerk to say that to someone else.

[cinderbella]

I would say 20 pounds.

I had the same issues with both of my pregnancies and only say the total gained on top of the weight I was to begin with.

And yes, death stare and teasing is definitely appropriate.

[wambam]

I would give them the middle finger and walk away.

[irishbride2]

I would say 32 but he was a jerk for correcting you, unless maybe you were trying to shame someone else about their weight gain. That's the only exception I can think of.

[adhdfashion]

Doesn't matter, you never say your wife gain more weight. Not Cool Bro

[badtzmaru22]

I would go from where you started, so 20.

[EmilieMadison]

Death stare sounds appropriate.

But you are correct. You calculate the net gain, not the total gain including gaining back what you already had.

I gained 45 lbs total during my 2nd pregnancy, but 15 of that was just getting back up to my starting weight after being really sick the first tri. So from my starting weight to my ending weight, my total was 30.

[sofamonkey]

You sure are a lucky gal, what with caring friends & that sweet husband of yours!!

[BaliHai]

20lbs, though really I like to think I wouldn't answer at all.

[Waffles]

Absolutely 20 pounds and double death stare!

[Deleted]

I would divorce my husband.

[CrazyLucky]

Sept 19, 2014 8:12:35 GMT -5 @cse1960 said:

Net gain. Plus, your dh was dickish to say this, AND, whoever the hell was asking you how much you gained (unless it was a health care provider) was an asshole to boot. What's with all the how much did you gain crap?

Oh yes, no doubt.  My mom really does have no filter.  She's old, but not old enough to get away with having no filter.  I can't tell you the number of inappropriate things she says or asks.  
DH learned a lesson that day.

[CrazyLucky]

Sept 19, 2014 8:30:26 GMT -5 @lazerus24 said:

I would divorce my husband.

DS had colic at the time.  No way was DH getting out of THAT joy.

[auntie]

You and I had similar pregnancies.

I was 12 pounds down at 15 weeks. I also got the colicky kid.

In a perfect world where you'd had enough sleep to think clearly the answer would be "exactly the right number according to my doctor."

My doctor noted my pregnancy weight gain as 18. My first appointment weight -minus- the weight when I was admitted to deliver. So 20 in your case.

[CrazyLucky]

Sept 19, 2014 8:47:39 GMT -5 @cse1960 said:

Sept 19, 2014 8:32:08 GMT -5 CrazyLucky said:

DS had colic at the time.  No way was DH getting out of THAT joy.

And I get that this was four years ago and you're not mad, but I am retroactively angry on your behalf. You've got a colicky baby, and your mom and dh are arguing with you over how much weight you gained while this kid is screaming hours a day in  your face? 

Seriously. These people should have to go around giving public service announcements on DontBeADick.com. 

I'm at the point with my mom where I just shake my head.  If I got mad every time she said something offensive... i don't know what, I'd just always be mad I guess.
In DH's defense, he was also not getting enough sleep.  Maybe there is such a thing as Daddy Brain?

[thatgirl2478]

I would say 20.

The example is really similar to what happened to me - except that I started WW at the beginning of the cycle that I got pregnant in, lost 10lbs, then gained 35.  So right now instead of saying I gained 35, I'm saying I gained 25.

[cville]

How about 20 lbs of oranges in a sock, swung right at his head?

[Deleted]

Tell your H he is wrong and can make it up to you by doing any chores you hate over the weekend while you go pamper yourself!

[jennistarr1]

"the normal amount"

[isabel]

What? You gained 20 pounds. It's based on your pre-pregnancy weight. And also, your H is kind of a dick and I would have let him know it.

Full disclosure: I'm already feeling sensitive about weight gain and am worried about gaining too much.

[statlerwaldorf]

I always say the amount I gained from my prepregnancy weight and mention that I lost some in the beginning and gained it back. I've only answered on here. No one has asked me IRL.