WWYD? (or, tell me if I am being nuts GP)

[genet313]

I'm really losing perspective, and need some outside thoughts ladies...

2 weeks ago we had a really bad anatomy scan. Baby was measuring 9 days behind, she had echogenic bowel, and had single umbilical artery (supposed to have 2, not 1). And they couldn't get a good look at her face to check for cleft lip/palate. They couldn't figure out what was wrong with her, my doc said she didn't know what was up, so we got sent to a genetic counselor, did a whole bunch of blood work, we did an amnio (despite my originally never wanting to do one, I caved).

Fast forward 2 weeks, amnio came back good so far (we're still waiting on the full gene karotype but no trisomies or CF were detected). No infection, CMV, infections, etc.

And we returned for a follow-up U/S. Magically, the echogenic bowel has completely disappeared. And now, they see 2 arteries, not just 1. We were told "oh, might have been a shadow on the u/s machine." ok..... She's still measuring really small (14 days back, which is not good) and they still could not see her face well.

So now they want me to go back again next week for yet another scan to see if they can see her face.

I am feeling very "over-doctored" at the moment. The last two weeks were two of the worst weeks of my life - doctors, appointments, worrying, worrying, worrying. And that just cannot be good for the baby. I honestly do not care one bit if this child has cleft lip. There's nothing they can do right now anyway, so what's the point of stressing over it? I'm perfectly happy to do growth scans every 2 weeks to make sure baby is still growing but anything more is just stressful.

Thoughts? I'm going to ask my doc of course but I wonder if I'm just being crazy and that I should go back anyway.



TL;DR: After 2 tries, still can't see baby's face at anatomy scan. Given the extra monitoring I will now have due to slow growth, I don't want to go back a third time. Is it crazy to just want to skip?

[Deleted]

I think you should share that concern with the doctor and ensure there isn't something he/she is worried about and hasn't conveyed to you. Sometimes they don't tell you everything.

It sounds like more communication is in order either way.

Good luck!

[Deleted]

I'm sorry that you are going through this. I'm not sure what I would do in your position. I think I would want as many answers as possible, no matter how many scans that entailed. However, I have to agree that all of the extra tests would be causing additional stress, which is probably not good for your mental health or your baby.

Thinking of you and your little one!

[thatgirl2478]

I can understand not wanting to keep up with the additional monitoring, however I think that it's really for the best. If they can figure out what problems she might have NOW, they can plan for how to best help her and you after delivery.

Things change so quickly in uetero! My baby's kidney was found to be extremely dilated & not developing at our A/S, however at our last scan, while it's still small it *may* have some function. Ultrasounds have come a long way from the 1970's when my mom was having them, but they still aren't the end all be all.

Try not to get too stressed out before you know what's going on. Can you take some time off to destress? Maybe even getting a massage or whatever relaxes you would help? I am so sorry you have to deal with this, but I agree with the others, *I* would want all the tests I could get.

[linz]

Is there an MFM in your area you can see? Maybe their machine can give you a better perspective. I'm glad the amnio came back fine. I'm sure it's hard not to stress especially on the growth issue. I know that was always my biggest concern. But maybe it's just a small baby? Or I know some babies have had a umbilical cord issues to where they aren't getting as much nutrients, but still turn out fine. It seems odd your Dr can't give you any type of answer.

[MamaMaui24]

I'm one that wants ALL the information, so I would still go. If they still can't get a clear pic at that appt, then you'll default to your one in 2 wks.

Good luck with everything.

[smsm24]

I get where you are coming from. I think i would talk to my doctor about exactly what they would do if they found any issues with the face. My understanding is that the sooner after birth (i don't know if that means hours, days or weeks) they do corrective surgery for cleft lip the better the results. If going back for more scans would significantly improve the outcome - i.e. they know when you go into labor to get the surgery set up or it changes decisions about what hospital to deliver at (closer to a children's hospital) i would get it done. If not then i would just go for the growth scans and call it a day.

[Bonita]

Like MamaMaui I always want more information, so I would also probably go for the US.

If they still can't see what they're looking for then I would probably tell your doctor something similar to what you told us - it's stressful for you to just keep coming back and not getting any more information and that you don't understand what the point is currently of trying to keep doing ultrasounds to see Baby's face. Then I would ask if there are more concerns beyond the cleft lip/palate?

[Poppy]

You are not nuts. You need to take care of yourself, too.

Just want to offer more hugs.

[Brie]

I don't think I would push back against this. They're being cautious, but it's pretty low-risk to you at this point and could potentially provide important information.

If she does have a cleft lip/palate, sure, there's not much you can do right now, but I'd still want to know so I could educate myself, let family know, find specialists in the area, potentially deliver at a different hospital, etc.

[azurely]

You're not nuts. That's a lot to take in and you've already been through a ton. I can understand wanting to just be done.

If it were me though, I would want the third ultrasound. I would want all the info I can get, so I can be as prepared as possible at birth, like Brie said.

Hugs.

[626]

Hugs to you genet313.

I just talked to my mom about this. I will PM you.

[genet313]

Thanks ladies - sounds like I am a little nuts.

I called my doc, and the nurse told me to delay the follow-up until the next 2 weeks growth scan, so I'm going to do that.   So it will get looked at, just not as soon as anticipated, which I think will be good for my sanity.  FX she's growing until then!

[MrsAggie]

I think delaying it is a good idea but avoiding altogether is not. Your sentiments on this matter are by no means unique or wrong. I have had many mamas just not want to deal with the stress or turn to God to help them instead of doctors. I completely understand those tactics but from the other perspective, that of the healthcare team, the more that we know about what to expect, the better we can prepare to help baby. Especially with the growth restriction, your doctor may decide to deliver you slightly early.

The second ultrasound is VERY reassuring by the way so take a couple weeks to celebrate the good news and spoil yourself a little.

[laurenh]

I'm sorry you're going through this and I understand the stress it has to be causing. I would still keep up with everything the doctor is recommending but maybe try to ask if after each scan (or during) we could discuss exactly what they're seeing/not seeing so that I had a clear picture before leaving and also a clear picture of what that meant for the next appointment. Hugs. If you aren't seeing an MFM I would probably ask for a referral to one because their equipment is likely better.

I hope her growth picks up, I know it's incredibly stressful. DD measured pretty normally at our a/s but at some point after that she basically quit growing and at 34 weeks was below the 10th percentile so I had frequent growth scans and NSTs to monitor. She only gained 6oz from that point until when I delivered at 39 weeks but the scans honestly made me feel much more comfortable with the decision to keep her in.

[Deleted]

Sept 19, 2014 19:55:06 GMT -5 genet313 said:

Thanks ladies - sounds like I am a little nuts.

I called my doc, and the nurse told me to delay the follow-up until the next 2 weeks growth scan, so I'm going to do that.   So it will get looked at, just not as soon as anticipated, which I think will be good for my sanity.  FX she's growing until then!

Sounds like a good plan:)

Hugs:)