Raise her up and keep her hair combed is making me giggle. This from their filing however, is not:
When the receptionist returned for the second time, she asked Jennifer if she had requested an African American donor to which she replied, "No, why would I request that? My partner and I are Caucasian. You know that from our profiles."
i assume they didn't want people to know they used a sperm bank.
They sound like racist assholes who are upset to be raising a biracial child because they are intolerant and are blaming their community for their own issues.
I understand suing over the mix up because it is a major mistake the sperm bank made. But the rest of it is absolute bullshit.
I would have far more sympathy if they were a opposite sex white couple who didn't want to announce to the world that they'd grown their family through non-traditional means. But I admit to feeling some kind of way that a lesbian couple would be this cranky. This is probably flameworthy statement and I'm working on sorting it out.
Also, they are aware, yes that it's possible to get a biracial looking child with seemingly white genes, yes?
I think they are mad that they now have to confront their privilege. Their shitty racist ass neighborhood was totally a great place for them to settle and raise children . . . until they had a baby of color to raise.
I was wondering if they got what they requested but dude was passing and they couldn't tell.
I would be far more interested in seeing them detail the ways in which their child will suffer in this world, her reduced wage expectancy, the difficulties she will face in getting into college as ways in which they have been harmed by this mix up.
I think it would be an interesting discussion about the ways in which black women in particular are undervalued in society.
Everyone I know is racist and I have to drive to a black neighborhood where they make me feel weird is some low hanging fruit.
I was wondering if they got what they requested but dude was passing and they couldn't tell.
No, they clearly fucked up. Apparently, she had to call the place directly and tell them what sperm to send over to the clinic. She said 330, some woman wrote it down as 380. The woman corrected the receptionist when she said 380 and then no one checked to be sure they did finally send 330.
Also, the sperm back didn't refund them for all of the ordered sperm, on the second batch after they realized the error. The first batch that they used over time to get pregnant was not refunded.
Sorry but she lives 45 miles from Cleveland and about the same from Youngstown, and is basically Akron/Canton. Neither of which are bastions of intolerance. Uniontown might be a little pocket of racist bastardy but nope, I don't think they need to worry so much about racism and non-acceptance of a mixed-race child.
What I think is the problem is that Ohio is a bastion of intolerance where HOMOSEXUALITY is not condoned and she/they grew up with this intolerance. Much of Ohio is intolerant, but NW Ohio is the most liberal area out there (and not just in Ohio). Maybe Uniontown is a pocket of white supremacy in an area where there are plenty of places to live and plenty of places to hang out that would accept them and their daughter. They just need to step out of their white-picket-fence-white-neighbors and meet other people who aren't such bigots. There are a LOT of them in the area. They just haven't bothered to meet them.
I totally agree that they should sue for the incorrect vials. And I understand that the "easiest" case to make is a wrongful birth claim, and probably the best reasoning for such a claim with the highest damages result is that the child is black/mixed. But it doesn't sit well with me or bode well for the child that there is litigation out there saying she's "less than" because she is mixed and not purely Aryan white. She will find out eventually, when she or someone she knows learns what an internet search engine does.
ETA: Catlawdy gave a great explanation; as a non-attorney who does know Ohio civil procedure (Ohio ABA paralegal who worked litigation for over a decade), she explained it well.
As a white woman raising a black teenager and about to give birth to a biracial daughter, I can't roll my eyes any harder over the "hardship" of having to occasionally interact with black people in order to get her daughter a haircut.
But at the same time, she had the right to choose her child's biological father, and the clinic's screw up took that right away from her.
Raise her up and keep her hair combed is making me giggle. This from their filing however, is not:
When the receptionist returned for the second time, she asked Jennifer if she had requested an African American donor to which she replied, "No, why would I request that? My partner and I are Caucasian. You know that from our profiles."
i assume they didn't want people to know they used a sperm bank.
Off topic but my wife just started a new job and a coworker was asking about our kids. DW said something like "We have three, one was a bonus baby"(this is her stupid way of saying we got twins the second time around) and the coworker said "Oh, so the last one was an accident." Ummm, no accidents in this household honey. It's honestly funny sometimes how deep the heterosexual norm/mindset goes. This lady didn't even think twice about the fact that a gay woman can't have an accidental pregnancy (in a married gay relationship).
I understand suing for getting the wrong sperm. That was a huge mess up and and getting their money back and a letter of apology doesn't seem to be enough punishment or compensation for a mess up of this magnitude.
Is there a reason why they would need to note all this other stuff to win the lawsuit? Is this them trying to show the hardships and difficulties they have suffered because of the clinic's mistake? Do they need to do that to win their case?
IL is a fact pleading state so you have to plead with specificity. If I were the defense attorney, I would immediately go to "no damages." Even if someone does you wrong, you can't sue them if it didn't cause an actual harm. To avoid a pretty obvious motion to dismiss, they are stating their damages in the body of the complaint.
Which is why they're bringing up the racial prejudice in their neighborhood. Otherwise the argument is, "You wanted a baby, you got one, there are no damages."
i assume they didn't want people to know they used a sperm bank.
Off topic but my wife just started a new job and a coworker was asking about our kids. DW said something like "We have three, one was a bonus baby"(this is her stupid way of saying we got twins the second time around) and the coworker said "Oh, so the last one was an accident." Ummm, no accidents in this household honey. It's honestly funny sometimes how deep the heterosexual norm/mindset goes. This lady didn't even think twice about the fact that a gay woman can't have an accidental pregnancy (in a married gay relationship).
HAHA!
It's like when people ask if B/G twins are identical.
I don't like these people but am absolutely okay with suing the bank. I'd also be checking the doctor's office to see if they broke any of their own protocol. WTF did this woman not see the vials before laying down to get knocked up?! Each and every time we did an IUI (4 in total using 5 vials) I saw the vials. Hell - I initialed the vials! I saw the donor number right on the vial and the date the donation was stored. Nothing was going up in my vag without me making sure it was what I had a paid a lot of money for. And to my RE's office credit they would say the donor number out loud and read it off the vial and double check at every point.
Sorry but she lives 45 miles from Cleveland and about the same from Youngstown, and is basically Akron/Canton. Neither of which are bastions of intolerance. Uniontown might be a little pocket of racist bastardy but nope, I don't think they need to worry so much about racism and non-acceptance of a mixed-race child.
What I think is the problem is that Ohio is a bastion of intolerance where HOMOSEXUALITY is not condoned and she/they grew up with this intolerance. And maybe Uniontown is a pocket of white supremacy in an area where there are plenty of places to live and plenty of places to hang out that would accept them and their daughter. They just need to step out of their white-picket-fence-white-neighbors and meet other people who aren't such bigots. There are a LOT of them in the area. They just haven't bothered to meet them.
I totally agree that they should sue for the incorrect vials. And I understand that the "easiest" case to make is wrongful birth and the reasoning is that the child is black/mixed. But it doesn't bode well for the child that there is litigation out there saying she's "less than" because she is mixed and not purely Aryan white. She will find out eventually.
Really they should just move to Columbus. It's a happy little rainbow enclave* thanks to academia and fashion. Unless they're Michigan fans, in which case they should probably just leave the state.
*hyperbole. I'm aware Columbus is not without its issues. But there is a thriving gay community, and it's relatively racially diverse for a Midwestern city.
I can understand the pain and humiliation they must have felt when the baby's appearance makes it obvious that the biological father of this baby was not the woman's partner.
I would have far more sympathy if they were a opposite sex white couple who didn't want to announce to the world that they'd grown their family through non-traditional means. But I admit to feeling some kind of way that a lesbian couple would be this cranky. This is probably flameworthy statement and I'm working on sorting it out.
Also, they are aware, yes that it's possible to get a biracial looking child with seemingly white genes, yes?
I think they are mad that they now have to confront their privilege. Their shitty racist ass neighborhood was totally a great place for them to settle and raise children . . . until they had a baby of color to raise.
I was wondering if they got what they requested but dude was passing and they couldn't tell.
This totally was an Law & Order episode!!! Dad was passing and killed his wife because she wouldn't give their black baby up for adoption and thought he would have gotten fired from his job if people knew he wasn't white.
Some of the wording is pretty icky. But that's the case with pretty much all wording in pretty much every wrongful birth suit, because it almost has to be.
I won't deny that there are more challenges raising a bi-racial baby who "looks" bi-racial, i.e. black. Mostly from a cultural POV. The wording about her having to go to a black neighborhood to get her hair cut is kind of funny, but I want to say that @jermys has complained before about white people with black babies who don't know how to do their hair. And if you literally have no black friends or family members, your child can have a hard time with their own identity come adolescence. Which I assume is what asdfjkl is getting at.
And it's easy to say they should move away from these racist assholes, but they seem pretty tied to it. I mean, aside from college, it appears this woman has spent most of her life in this town. And it doesn't exactly seem like moving 10 minutes away is an option since she didn't know any black people until she was EIGHTEEN. It can be HARD to leave. I know, I've done it. Many people haven't, can't, or don't want to. Also, there's a lot of benefit to having friends and family nearby in terms of childcare, holiday celebrations, etc. Maybe she and her parents live in a large multifamily house because she can't afford to live on her own in this community, so buying somewhere else really would be a hardship? We've discussed the complications in the suggestion to "just move" before now.
Anyway. I'm not sure if those are her words or her lawyer's elaborations. Maybe it's an exaggeration to show that no, really, she doesn't know anything about raising a black child.
This totally was an Law & Order episode!!! Dad was passing and killed his wife because she wouldn't give their black baby up for adoption and thought he would have gotten fired from his job if people knew he wasn't white.
Noooooooooooooooooooo! How could you get it so wrong, my L&O partner in crime!
His exwife killed the new pregnant wife, remember? The divorce from the exwife was spurred when she found out he was passing and then he had to triple her child support and alimony to get her to take custody of her own child. She did not want him because he was black but the husband couldn't raise the kid because of his work schedule.
Later when he remarried and his new wife caught a case of the babies, that ratchet bitch killed the woman because she didn't want people to know she had babies with a black man.
Some of the wording is pretty icky. But that's the case with pretty much all wording in pretty much every wrongful birth suit, because it almost has to be.
I won't deny that there are more challenges raising a bi-racial baby who "looks" bi-racial, i.e. black. Mostly from a cultural POV. The wording about her having to go to a black neighborhood to get her hair cut is kind of funny, but I want to say that @jermys has complained before about white people with black babies who don't know how to do their hair. And if you literally have no black friends or family members, your child can have a hard time with their own identity come adolescence. Which I assume is what asdfjkl is getting at.
And it's easy to say they should move away from these racist assholes, but they seem pretty tied to it. I mean, aside from college, it appears this woman has spent most of her life in this town. And it doesn't exactly seem like moving 10 minutes away is an option since she didn't know any black people until she was EIGHTEEN. It can be HARD to leave. I know, I've done it. Many people haven't, can't, or don't want to. Also, there's a lot of benefit to having friends and family nearby in terms of childcare, holiday celebrations, etc. Maybe she and her parents live in a large multifamily house because she can't afford to live on her own in this community, so buying somewhere else really would be a hardship? We've discussed the complications in the suggestion to "just move" before now.
Anyway. I'm not sure if those are her words or her lawyer's elaborations. Maybe it's an exaggeration to show that no, really, she doesn't know anything about raising a black child.
They used to live in a more racially diverse neighborhood. They left it because they wanted their children raised in the better schools and closer to their racist and homophobic families.
I doubt she was raised by lesbians and yet she's figuring out how to raise children in a same sex household.
But yes, I agree that they are trying to prove damages here.
This totally was an Law & Order episode!!! Dad was passing and killed his wife because she wouldn't give their black baby up for adoption and thought he would have gotten fired from his job if people knew he wasn't white.
Noooooooooooooooooooo! How could you get it so wrong, my L&O partner in crime!
His exwife killed the new pregnant wife, remember? The divorce from the exwife was spurred when she found out he was passing and then he had to triple her child support and alimony to get her to take custody of her own child. She did not want him because he was black but the husband couldn't raise the kid because of his work schedule.
Later when he remarried and his new wife caught a case of the babies, that ratchet bitch killed the woman because she didn't want people to know she had babies with a black man.
Mothership L&O or SVU? I watch a shitload of both but why am I not remembering this episode?
I would have far more sympathy if they were a opposite sex white couple who didn't want to announce to the world that they'd grown their family through non-traditional means. But I admit to feeling some kind of way that a lesbian couple would be this cranky. This is probably flameworthy statement and I'm working on sorting it out.
Also, they are aware, yes that it's possible to get a biracial looking child with seemingly white genes, yes?
I think they are mad that they now have to confront their privilege. Their shitty racist ass neighborhood was totally a great place for them to settle and raise children . . . until they had a baby of color to raise.
Remember that super racist white South African couple that turned out to have had black ancestors wayyyyyyyyy back that they were unaware of... Until they had a black daughter,
Noooooooooooooooooooo! How could you get it so wrong, my L&O partner in crime!
His exwife killed the new pregnant wife, remember? The divorce from the exwife was spurred when she found out he was passing and then he had to triple her child support and alimony to get her to take custody of her own child. She did not want him because he was black but the husband couldn't raise the kid because of his work schedule.
Later when he remarried and his new wife caught a case of the babies, that ratchet bitch killed the woman because she didn't want people to know she had babies with a black man.
Mothership L&O or SVU? I watch a shitload of both but why am I not remembering this episode?
Mothership, prior to the existence of SVU I believe, in the era of Brisco and Curtis, but maybe Logan and with Claire Kincaid.
Noooooooooooooooooooo! How could you get it so wrong, my L&O partner in crime!
His exwife killed the new pregnant wife, remember? The divorce from the exwife was spurred when she found out he was passing and then he had to triple her child support and alimony to get her to take custody of her own child. She did not want him because he was black but the husband couldn't raise the kid because of his work schedule.
Later when he remarried and his new wife caught a case of the babies, that ratchet bitch killed the woman because she didn't want people to know she had babies with a black man.
Mothership L&O or SVU? I watch a shitload of both but why am I not remembering this episode?
Mothership. Remember the Lieutenant went in and congratulated him?
I would have far more sympathy if they were a opposite sex white couple who didn't want to announce to the world that they'd grown their family through non-traditional means. But I admit to feeling some kind of way that a lesbian couple would be this cranky. This is probably flameworthy statement and I'm working on sorting it out.
Also, they are aware, yes that it's possible to get a biracial looking child with seemingly white genes, yes?
I think they are mad that they now have to confront their privilege. Their shitty racist ass neighborhood was totally a great place for them to settle and raise children . . . until they had a baby of color to raise.
Remember that super racist white South African couple that turned out to have had black ancestors wayyyyyyyyy back that they were unaware of... Until they had a black daughter,
Mothership L&O or SVU? I watch a shitload of both but why am I not remembering this episode?
Mothership. Remember the Lieutenant went in and congratulated him?
Yes, Van Buren took one look at him and said, I got this. Then she went in, sat down on the edge of the table, and said, "Congratulations, my brotha," while he squirmed.
Mothership, prior to the existence of SVU I believe, in the era of Brisco and Curtis, but maybe Logan and with Claire Kincaid.
I have to go back deeper into my memory for this then but thanks!
But this is the year that was on A&E every time you turned on the television. I believe it's the same season that McCoy got a hard on for basically stalking that pedophile and then his daughter ended up bashing him in the head and the same season as the woman who claimed her baby was kidnapped. Then Curtis had to spend the whole day trying to talk her into just admitting she stuck the baby in the furnace.
Negligence happened. In order to win a negligence case you have to prove damages. All wrongful birth cases sound yucky on paper. This one being no different.
I'm not mad that they sued. They paid for something, and didn't get what they paid for.
I was uncomfortable reading the rest of the lawsuit as it went on, because the rest of it struck me as "You're suing because the other people in your lives are essentially assholes." If the lawsuit had stopped at "Breach of contract, failure to uphold contract" whatever...but then to go on and on about how your white neighborhood is hard, your white family won't accept the child, your white XY and Z makes raising this child hard...look, I don't doubt that raising a child of another race is incredibly hard, but the way this was all phrased just doesn't sit right with me. It seems like they're asking for money not just because of the clinic's mistake (which I think is completely valid) but because the people in their lives are shitheads - which is not.