3 networking questions [Update at end]

[v]

2 are related; one isn't.

1.  I have a coffee meeting tomorrow with a colleague (J) of my friend (M).  M sent J my resume because she knew I was looking and that J was thinking of creating a new position in his group; months later J is hopeful that he will get approval for the position so he invited me to coffee tomorrow morning to discuss it.  Two questions:
 
(a) Can I get away with wearing a conservative sheath dress and a blazer, or should I really go with a suit?  With where the meeting is it would be much quicker for me to take a bike, but I don't have any biking-appropriate suits.  I do have sheath dresses that will survive the ride.

(b) Who pays for the coffee?  I'm happy to pay for whatever, but I just want to make that whole dance as unawkward as possible.

2.  I just applied for a job at a company and I'd like to send my resume to a contact there to try to get it in human hands rather than lost in the recruiting super computer (it is a huge company).  It is a litigation counsel position.  Which of these people would you send it to?

A -- one of my sister's best friends who I see several times a year and like very much.  He's an SVP at the company in a capacity that is entirely unrelated to the legal department.  I'm sure he knows people in the legal department, but I'd be shocked if they're the ones involved in this position.  But he knows recruiting pretty well and has gotten several people jobs at the company.

B -- someone I used to work with years ago (he was a few years junior to me and we were friendly but not friends) but I haven't spoken to since, who is in the legal department but in an entirely different capacity since he's an M&A guy (and it is a HUGE legal department).  

C -- current coworker (who knows I am looking for a job so there's no issue there) has a contact in the right part of the legal department, but I've never met that contact.  So I could ask C to put me in touch with her contact, but I'm coming an extra step away from the company in that situation.

Thanks for any advice  


ETA: ONE MORE -- How do I actually figure out who J is tomorrow?  We've never met, and we're meeting up in a coffee shop.  Should I email him in the morning with a "I'll be wearing x and have brown hair" or is something like that too date-y?  

[v]

Oct 6, 2014 17:43:21 GMT -5 @choco said:

1. I think first impressions are important and would wear a suit or at least a dress with a blazer over it, just give yourself plenty of time to get there. I would offer to pay, so wait until you get inside, call, walk up to order together.

2. Send to all of them. It doesn't hurt to have your resume submitted from different angles. Plus, you never know which one will have better contacts.

3. Ask for a cell number and say I will give you a call when I get there.

More casual choice is grey suiting fabric sheath dress with a black blazer over it.  It's either that + bike in 15 minutes or suit + subway + walking in about a half an hour.  No biggie either way, but it would be nice to get there quicker.

[v]

Oct 6, 2014 17:44:57 GMT -5 RockNVoll said:

Does J have a picture on LinkedIn, Facebook, corporate bio page, etc? Otherwise, ask M what he looks like and take the risk of going up to someone and saying, "J?"

Sheath and blazer sound fine. This is a coffee meetup, not a formal interview.

I suspect he'll pay.

No harm in pursuing #2 through more than one route IMO. I'd go with both 2a and 2c, but if you're only comfortable with one I'd go with 2a.

I'm glad you say that -- I was concerned about seeming too harassing or aggressive if the resume lands in the same hands two different ways, but if you guys say 2 ways is okay I'll do both.

J has a photo on his company's website and I have photos on my firm website and linkedin, so I do know what he looks like (generically pleasant looking man in his late 50s -- hopefully there won't be too many of those there).  I truly have the world's worst facial recognition skills though, so I would not be surprised if I get it wrong

[mcc]

I'd do dress with a blazer. Stalk him on LInkedIn or company website before that. J invited you to coffee so he will likely pay.

I'd contact 2a to put you in touch with the right person.

Good luck!

[midwest07]

1 - I think you can wear the outfit that allows you to bike there.  I would guess he will pay.  Do the thing where you get out your wallet like you will pay, then he will say "oh no I have this" and you say "oh thank you so much".

2 - I would probably lean toward asking person A if it's ok to send through multiple avenues, but would lean toward sending through all 3 if this is a job you are really serious about.  If you only want to do 2 people, then I would cut out person B.  I think person C is good because it would mean a lot for a current coworker to make a recommendation of you.  And of course person A is good because she knows you the best, has had success with others, and will do the most for you since she knows you.

Other question -  You already said you know vaguely what he looks like, but get there early and take a quick look around when you get there and see if you see someone who looks familiar.  Then post yourself near the door and keep a look out and it's totally fine to ask people if they are so and so.  This seems so common for morning coffee/networking meetings.

[h]

I agree with @choco and @rock-n-Voll. Sheath and blazer in suiting fabric is fine (assuming you skip the MM multi-functional orthopedic sandals in favor of appropriate footwear and accessories ). Offer to pay but relent quickly and graciously if he offers. Send your resume to anyone at the company who might help you--definitely a and c , possibly b as well.

Good luck!

[cheezer]

Sheath plus blazer is fine. I usually tell someone what I'm going to be wearing so they can find me. Especially because men always seem to wear identical outfits (like there's 3 buys in grey pants and blue shirts).

[Deleted]

1. I think a dress + Blazer is okay. Granted, I've had coffee shop meetings in workout gear -- yes, it lead to paying work.
As for payment, offer to pay.

2. I'd let them all know you are interested. Then they'll likely have heard of you from a variety of people and you be top of mind.

3. Call when you get there....

[cosmos]

Oct 6, 2014 20:36:53 GMT -5 @littlemoxie said:

Suit and cab
I think 2a could get it in the right hands, even in a legal dept of 100+

This. Send it to the SVP, no question.

[Poppy]

I don't think it's bad to have two people forward your resume. I have done that for my last two jobs and got both. Both hiring managers commented on it but neither in a negative way, so I think it helped me stand out.

[v]

I went with sheath dress and bike. *Maybe* flashed every single person on the way (slit on dress made dress ride up), but oh well. And my husband wonders why I won't commute by bike every day!

Meeting went really well. Potential manager was great (as I was expecting -- M and another friend who recently left this company really, really like him) and the job sounds really interesting and like J really wants it to be a big growth opportunity. Two problems: (1) it is in NJ (a commutable part of NJ, but I'd have to drive or take a train! And driving would require buying a presentable car and a very expensive parking spot); (2) it would be about 40% travel (though some of that travel would be to exotic places like "midtown Manhattan" and "Jersey City" that would be closer than the office). Still, I'm hoping that he gets the budget approvals for it to move forward.

And no issue with buying. We each bought our own because he got there way, way early.

Will send my resume to A -- and probably C -- today. Thanks!

[DirtySouth]

I'm normally of the opinion that it's better to overdress, but in this situation I think a sheath dress and blazer is totally fine.  It's not a job interview and if you don't normally wear a suit, then wearing one might look like you are trying too hard.  A sheath dress and blazer is pretty darn close to a suit and I think it's totally appropriate.  I used to wear suits for one on one networking, but was truly the only person who ever wore a suit, so I decided to do nice business casual.

I always pay if I invite.  If they invited, I always assume I'm paying for myself, but the other person usually insists on picking up the tab.

I'd send the resume to the previous co-worker - it's someone you actually know and they are in the right department.

I usually look the person up on LinkedIn or look for their online bio and photo so I can easily spot them.  However, I have had people send me a description of themselves, and I don't find that weird at all.

[DirtySouth]

Oops, just saw that you already went! Good luck with the jobs!

[v]

Update on question (2): I ended up having both A and C reach out about me, and just got an email that they'd like to interview me (in-person -- so they're skipping the phone screen, which is nice). Thanks for the advice

I got another interview today (for another job I asked about the other day -- my question was whether to list friend as a referral on the application before he explicitly said yes) so this has been a good week!

[jene]

Good luck! I hope you find a good fit!

[v]

You guys are very sweet. Thank you!

[spunkarella]

It sounds like things may be falling into place for you. Fingers crossed and good luck!