It's pouring rain here and probably won't stop most of the day so I wore my rain boots to work. I'm not changing my shoes now that I'm in the office.
I'm working really hard on the stuff I posted about last week (week before? Can't remember exactly) and it's taking a huge emotional toll on me but I think it'll pay off in the end.
My Hokies play Thursday night. I'm going to be at a family function and am worried I won't get to see the game. Bah!
Wedding guy told me his oldest daughter asked when she'll get to meet me and he just put her off (we both know it would be way too soon). I forget how he said it.
There is a caramel apple cupcake chilling in my fridge right now. I kind of want to eat it for breakfast but know that would be bad.
H and I watched "The Affair" premier last night...and something about it got me all worked up and emotional. Not the affair part, at all...I actually felt like that was a bit contrived/forced.
It was the kids. For some reason, it took my mind to memories of how I used to be responsible for keeping track of all my brothers and sisters. My mom was so paranoid about losing/misplacing a kid I would do everything I could to keep everyone together. I wouldn't force everyone to stay together really, but I always knew exactly where each and every one of them had wandered off, and if someone got too far I'd go fetch them back. And I would count: onetwothreefourfivesixseveneightnineten Over and over again.
I cried a bit, but I also don't think I freaked out too badly. I couldn't explain to H why I was upset, though. So this morning we had a conversation about how he's worried about me.
Also random, I started my period last night. Which probably helps explain (at least a little bit) my emotional chaos. H said he thinks it's good that I'm scratching the surface, but that I need to start doing real work to resolve my issues.
Wedding guy told me his oldest daughter asked when she'll get to meet me and he just put her off (we both know it would be way too soon). I forget how he said it.
There is a caramel apple cupcake chilling in my fridge right now. I kind of want to eat it for breakfast but know that would be bad.
How old is WG's daughter?
I vote eat the cupcake! It's basically a muffin with icing, right? That's totally a breakfast food
Wedding guy told me his oldest daughter asked when she'll get to meet me and he just put her off (we both know it would be way too soon). I forget how he said it.
There is a caramel apple cupcake chilling in my fridge right now. I kind of want to eat it for breakfast but know that would be bad.
How old is WG's daughter?
I vote eat the cupcake! It's basically a muffin with icing, right? That's totally a breakfast food
I have friends who cheer for the Hokies I hope you get to watch the game!
You're friends with some good peeps then
They are two of the best people I have ever met - and I am not exaggerating just because I like them lol She was my maid of honor, and her H went to VA Tech. They watch EVERY game. She's the closest I've ever had to a BFF, and my heart swells every time I think of them.
Also random, I started my period last night. Which probably helps explain (at least a little bit) my emotional chaos. H said he thinks it's good that I'm scratching the surface, but that I need to start doing real work to resolve my issues.
Should I be doing more in therapy?
Maybe you should tell him to go fu@k himself and that he needs to focus on his own issues rather than pointing the finger at you ALWAYS.
tiramisu, it's good that she's asking--it means he's told them about you. But yes, it is too soon.
I just had the most awesome lean cuisine ever (apple cranberry chicken).
I adore you, but I totally disagree with this. A monthish in is too soon for the kids to know anything, IMHO.
True. But who's to say how it happened? Maybe she asked if he was dating anyone (hell, I've gotten that question from my 5 year-old) and he answered honestly? I'm glad he squashed it though because yes it is too soon.
tiramisu, it's good that she's asking--it means he's told them about you. But yes, it is too soon.
I just had the most awesome lean cuisine ever (apple cranberry chicken).
I adore you, but I totally disagree with this. A monthish in is too soon for the kids to know anything, IMHO.
I've cautioned him about not telling them much of anything and I know he's just learning how to date with kids, since he was with his ex about as long as I was with mine. I met them once or twice in passing which is why I think he mentioned it. Well, that and his oldest asking and him not knowing what else to say. He needs to learn how to be honest without being too honest.
My response to him telling me what she asked was that it's clearly important to her to feel involved in his life even when she's not around. I think the most he's told them is that he's dating someone and that he won't be texting with me on the weekdays they're with him because he and I set that boundary. So not much, but probably more than 1 1/2 months warrants.
Post by bullygirl979 on Oct 14, 2014 11:20:46 GMT -5
I'm dreading this afternoon. I have to do a performance eval with someone that I gave less than stellar scores to. She will argue every point and it is draining.
Also random, I started my period last night. Which probably helps explain (at least a little bit) my emotional chaos. H said he thinks it's good that I'm scratching the surface, but that I need to start doing real work to resolve my issues.
Should I be doing more in therapy?
Maybe you should tell him to go fu@k himself and that he needs to focus on his own issues rather than pointing the finger at you ALWAYS.
The Death Stare was my first reaction when he started talking this morning. Honestly, though, if you had seen me last night...
H was so bored with the show that he fell asleep halfway in. He woke up to me pacing, talking to myself, scribbling out my thoughts on paper, typing madly on my laptop...and that was after I took a Xanax. And then when I tried to tell him why I was upset/emotional, nothing I said made any sense (partly, I'm sure, because he'd just woken up from a half-hour doze).
I don't know. I think he panics when he can't get me to calm down. This is a side of me that he's never really seen because every other time I've indulged it, he was passed out drunk on the couch. Now he's sober.
I adore you, but I totally disagree with this. A monthish in is too soon for the kids to know anything, IMHO.
I've cautioned him about not telling them much of anything and I know he's just learning how to date with kids, since he was worth his ex about as long as I was with mine. I met them once or twice in passing which is why I think he mentioned it. Well, that and his oldest asking and him not knowing what else to say. He needs to learn how to be honest without being too honest.
My response to him telling me what she asked was that it's clearly important to her to feel involved in his life even when she's not around. I think the most he's told them is that he's dating someone and that he won't be texting with me in the weekdays they're with him because he and I set that boundary. So not much, but probably more than 1 1/2 months warrants.
This is good, but it isn't going to stop them from asking questions. But it's on him to figure out how to be honest without being too honest.
cuddlyevil I agree it's on him. I think I haven't phrased it that way to him and it'll probably make more sense if I do. I have let him know that this will probably be a difficult transition for them, him dating, even though they told him they wanted him to get a girlfriend, so he needs to be prepared. It's clear from the way he's conducted himself so far that he really does put them first and if that changes and/or things seem to negatively impact them, I'll hit the brakes so fast. I've seen way too much of the damage that can be done to allow myself to become part of it.
Maybe you should tell him to go fu@k himself and that he needs to focus on his own issues rather than pointing the finger at you ALWAYS.
The Death Stare was my first reaction when he started talking this morning. Honestly, though, if you had seen me last night...
H was so bored with the show that he fell asleep halfway in. He woke up to me pacing, talking to myself, scribbling out my thoughts on paper, typing madly on my laptop...and that was after I took a Xanax. And then when I tried to tell him why I was upset/emotional, nothing I said made any sense (partly, I'm sure, because he'd just woken up from a half-hour doze).
I don't know. I think he panics when he can't get me to calm down. This is a side of me that he's never really seen because every other time I've indulged it, he was passed out drunk on the couch. Now he's sober.
I'm sure this is playing into his response. But seriously fuck him and this "you should do some real work" bull shit.
I vote eat the cupcake! It's basically a muffin with icing, right? That's totally a breakfast food
His oldest is 10, nearly 11.
It doesn't surprise me that she would be curious then.
Forgive me in advance because I've only ever truly dated one guy. I understand why he's hesitating to tell her more about you because your relationship with him is still pretty new and who really knows where it will go, right? But why would it be a bad thing for him to tell her exactly that? "I'm dating someone...I really like her (obviously!), but we're just now starting to get to know each other..." She sounds like a very perceptive kid who senses a change and wants to know what's going on. Sounds to me like she's trying to figure out how to handle this part of life herself. (please feel free to tell me to fuck off... I know my perception on life is skewed, and I might be offering very bad insight.)