How do you handle meeting other people's pets?

[ssmjlm]

And young children?

Similar to @this's predicament from the weekend, E went apeshit over some dogs that were near our mini-session until thankfully they had walked down the trail and out of sight.

My issue is, DH and I don't agree on how to communicate to her and/or teach her about other pets.  Our dog is a cuddlebug and has no problem with E.  This leads to her thinking that all dogs are like this.

She's too young to understand asking to pet a dog, etc, so I'm not sure what to do.  When we approach another dog I always try and say "Can E pet your dog?" And then say to E "Nice hands" while she's petting and thank you at the end.

[Brie]

I always tell C to wave at things. He will now stay where he is and wave and yell "HI PUPPY!" which I think is a safer bet.

I only let him pet if the dog owner offers first, which has happened a few times.

[suburbanzookeeper]

We're foster parents with a dog rescue so our kids are pretty well versed in "not everything loves you like our dogs love you." We have them wave and say hi from a distance. If the owner says it's OK to come over/say hi/pet the dog. The kids have to let the dog sniff their hand before they very gently pet it (usually with DS reminding him to be "soft"). It's something we've instilled from the beginning because our adoption events are total chaos with large, bouncy dogs who aren't used to little people.

[Deleted]

I say to DS "we don't pet dogs we don't know." That prevents him from running up to them. From several steps backs I say to the owner "may we say hello?" And if the owner says yes I say to DS "use gentle hands." It's gone okay so far!

[hski2349]

I tell DD, that she can only wave at dogs. We are not allowed to pet dogs, unless the people tell us it is ok. If people say it is ok, I still have her say please, just so she gets that she has to ask. I also tell her, not all dogs are like Lola and like to be pet. I started this very early with DD, before she could even pet dogs. She is now 2 and is getting this.

I know as a dog owner, I really cannot stand it when people run up to us and try to pet Lola without asking. She is 80 lbs, and is solid. She is not aggressive, but strong and can knock a little kid over and hurt them. I think people get confused because they see 2 year DD, who is a little taller than Lola walking right next to her, and then she is the calmest thing. Not always the case. As my dad has said, DD is part of Lola's pack so she is calm and mellow with her. (There is my long winded advice for the day).

[pinkdutchtulips]

dd's been at the dog park since she was old enough to walk. that said, I reminded her ad nasuem that the ONLY dogs you touch at the dog park are the ones that belong to YOU !!

as she got older, I told her that if she wanted to touch a dog, to find the dog's owner and ask bc not all dogs are friendly like our dogs. now, she knows to 1- ask if she can pet someone else's dog and 2- if its a go, to put out her hand so the other dog can sniff it and go from there.

[redheadbaker]

We first always ask if we may pet the animal. Then I teach DS to extend his hand, palm up, so the animal can sniff. If the animal seems agreeable, we either stroke under the chin, or gently pet the animal's back. (Strange hands going over an animal's head can be scary to the animal)

[rondonalddo]

I never ask to pet dogs. And I try to discourage my daughter from making eye contact with dogs we don't know, especially the ones in my little town that are just wandering around on the street. If an owner has a dog leashed and says my daughter she can pet the dog, I let her but I just watch her closely.

[speckledfrog]

We also just avoid petting and go with waving. About half the time the owner will stop and ask if we would like to pet their dog.

[aspentosh]

We have two dogs and we have always talked about respecting ALL animals. Especially ones that we don't know personally. So when we see a dog out and about (now at 2.75yo) she knows to stop and not pet without asking. When she does pet, it's gently, and not near the face.

This took a lot of patience and "training" on her part since she loves pups and always wants to say hi. If you want her to be interested in petting other dogs, I think you're doing a great job. If you want her to be happy with seeing and not touching, I like the waving idea.

[rondonalddo]

My kid's feelings about dogs depend on the dog. My brother's dog is super gentle and doesn't get in her face or jump on her, so she loves him. My SIL's dog is all up in her face and jumping on things, and she's just now mostly not afraid of him. We don't have a dog, FWIW. Just a dog-sized cat.

[dragonfly08]

Heaven forbid I try to kiss my 11 year old, but a dog? A dog can slobber all over her and she keeps coming back for more. It's pretty much always been that way (with dogs, at least...there did used to be a time when I was allowed to kiss her, too). DD #2 went through a phase where she was afraid, and still now has little interest in strange dogs but is friendly and likes to pet/give treats to the neighborhood pooches she knows.

I've always told my girls that we don't go up to animals we don't know b/c we wouldn't want to frighten them. That's been enough from the time they were little. They just say hello, sometimes wave, and wait for the owner to invite closer contact. I never put an owner on the spot by asking if my kids can pet the dog; in my experience it's pretty common that s/he will offer if it's appropriate.