It has to be possible. Screw this 4th trimester stuff because mine is spoiled. You cannot put her down. Ever. Cannot. Ever. I need some darn seperation.
This won't help now but I am telling you that you will BLINK and the only time the baby will snuggle with you is when they are sick, and you will think of this time fondly. Promise. Try to enjoy it because it will end, and soon.
Post by gibbinator on Oct 20, 2014 18:57:14 GMT -5
Ds1 was like this until he could walk. Um, so I feel your pain. The kick and play piano mat was a godsend though. It was the only thing he liked enough to get left alone on for 10-15 mins at a time. On the upside he's now a sweet and snuggly 2yr old.
Post by narockshard on Oct 20, 2014 18:59:01 GMT -5
Mine was like that for the first 4 weeks and then became SO much better around the 5th week. it felt like it would never end at the time! But if you need some alone time it certainly won't wreck her to cry for a few minutes.
This won't help now but I am telling you that you will BLINK and the only time the baby will snuggle with you is when they are sick, and you will think of this time fondly. Promise. Try to enjoy it because it will end, and soon.
My kid turns one on Wednesday, can you tell??
What the hell? Have you ever held a baby that screamed the second you even thought about putting it down? Yes, baby time is cute and precious but... Sometimes it's not. Not helpful.
:: hugs:: zarapipe put the baby somewhere safe and take a breather. Better yet, call someone else over to hold the baby if you can.
It has to be possible. Screw this 4th trimester stuff because mine is spoiled. You cannot put her down. Ever. Cannot. Ever. I need some darn seperation.
Vent over.
My first was like this. I feel for you. Lots of patience and deep breaths.
Dd was a challenge so I thought I would get lucky and have an easy baby this time yeah right, jokes on me. At least they are difficult in different ways to sharpen my game! DD1 wouldn't sleep ever. Dd2 sleeps pretty good but you can't put her down and she is a gassy fussy mess when she is awake. I do thought appreciate the good times more because thought I think than I did with dd1.
Does she like the carrier?? At least u would have 2 free hands!
She tolerates the ktan some but I have a beco gemini on the way I bought on the swap board that I'm excited to try. Today I did get to eat dinner while wearing her so that was a win.
I feel for you! C is almost 10 weeks and it's better but I still can't get him to nap unless I'm holding him. 2 things I find helpful - a good carrier and a stability/exercise ball. When he really needs to sleep but is too fussy to fall asleep I hold him upright against my chest and gently bounce sitting on the ball. It puts him to sleep 99% of the time. Of course I still can't put him down once he's asleep but at least he's sleeping.
Hang in there! You're doing great. This stage will pass!
I agree with the others about putting her down for a moment so you can get a breather! Letting her cry in a safe place to take care of her mom is important too!! I babysat for a little guy who only wanted to be held and bounced and could sense the stillness no matter how deep he was sleeping. It will pass eventually!
DS was like that, it was so fucking hard. I could never set him down, had to hold him for naps, or he would wake up immediately.
Also, I couldn't hold him and sit - being still was NOT OKAY. Baby wearing helped sometimes but I was also dealing with a broken tailbone so I had some trouble getting around.
I cried a lot then.
He's totally awesome now, at almost nine months. Still sleeps like crap, but it gets easier!
That really sucks. There is no shame in putting her down. DS wasn't like this to the extent you have going on, but he had his days. Still does.
I offer this truly as help not look at my awesome advice..so take it FWIW:
Will she lay on a boppy or on his side on a blanket? DS would screech all damn day until I figured this out. Does she like her swing. Cranked as high as you can make it spin...lol. Upright in her carseat on the LR floor? I had a nephew like that. Something about being snuggled in he liked. White noise during the day when he's awake. Send him to grandma's for awhile? I fed DS gripe water and gas drops like literal water for a streak. I suggest this because if he seems to be gassy at night be probably is in the day too.
Either way you have my hugs and sympathy. It blows.
Post by sporklemotion on Oct 20, 2014 21:08:22 GMT -5
DD was like this. And it had to be me almost all of the time. I ate many one handed meals because I would get something to eat and she would start to scream after about 3 minutes of DH holding her. It got better around 8 weeks, and even better at 12 weeks. By then, she would tolerate the bouncy seat for the length of a shower or the bassinet for the length of a pee break. At 10 months, she is still pretty clingy but nowhere near as bad as then. I did not enjoy the snuggles when they came at the expense of my hearing, my bathroom use, and my hygiene, not to mention my sleep. I may look back on it fondly when she's much, much older, but not for a long time.
Post by DarcyLongfellow on Oct 20, 2014 21:45:12 GMT -5
Newborns are miserable messes. I am not a fan. Even after my second who was a dream baby, I will take an interactive 7 month old ANY DAY.
DD1 was colicky and only stopped screaming when she was nursing. So I feel your pain. Literally.
The best advice I got for my colicky baby was from a nurse in L&D. She told me to take care of myself first and that it was totally okay to put the baby somewhere safe and go walk away for a bit. And it really is. Put her down and go take a 10 minute shower or whatever you need to do to feel human. She'll live (and not remember it).
Sometimes at the end of the day I'd want to scream from all the touching and neediness. And I assure you, I do not look fondly on that time. It's all about survival.
DD was the same way. I loathed the newborn stage. The only way I got through with any sanity was putting her in the Boba carrier. I'm glad you have a carrier coming soon. They're life savers. Hang in there lady.
Right there with you! And same issue with my older one being a bad sleeper, now he's a decent sleeper but must be held. Omg the car is the worst!! He likes the Boba wrap though.
Don't forget: you can drink again. I encourage you to pour a healthy glass of wine.
C was also a very needy newborn. I wore him a lot and did whatever I could to make him STFU. Hang in there and spoil yourself rotten in the few moments you can steal for yourself.
I don't have any advise, but wanted to say you're not alone. My 3 week old is fussy, gassy, doesn't want to sleep well during the day unless I'm holdinh him and is usually cranky when he's awake.
It's nice to hear I'm not the only one. I'm sure it will get better. :-)
Post by whitepicketfence on Oct 20, 2014 22:23:16 GMT -5
Oh man. DD1 was like that and almost 5 years later, I still vividly remember how awful that time was.
I'm so sorry, zarapipe. I know it's hard. DD1 would never tolerate any sort of carrier but my other two have loved it. I wear DD3 in the Ergo all the time because that's often the only way I can get through my day. Big hugs!
I will tell the fun story our pregnancy/childbirth/newborn teacher told the class.
Her first kid was having a long newborn crying jag. She needed to give herself a break. As a last ditch effort, she put the baby in a Moses basket and put the basket on the running washing machine, hoping he would stay quiet long enough that she could have a bowl of ice cream. It didn't work. She called her husband - this was before you could get advice from Google and GBCN and The Snap Tweets, back when telephones were for talking to people - and after a few minutes of PP/sleep deprived sobbing about how she just wanted to have some ice cream, he said "Well, how about putting the baby in the kitchen and you sit on the washing machine and eat some ice cream." So she did, she felt better, and mom and baby went on to live happy and fulfilling lives. The End.
Z didn't need to be held constantly at the beginning but is definitely in that stage now starting in the late morning. And being held while we sit is completely unacceptable. We have to be bouncing on the exercise ball or walking. It's been exhausting! At least he likes the stroller, so that's another go to when we need a break from holding him.
Hugs! G usually would allow me to put her down when she was a newborn, but the few times she wouldn't, I almost lost my mind. Maybe it's time to have your husband take a shift and get out of the house for an evening.
M was that child. I could NOT put him down and he had be moving. I wore him a ton and spent a lot of time on the ellipitcal at a slow glide ( MOTY- but my house is small and not much space to walk circles in).
I won't say it will get better because when people said that to me at the time I wanted to poke their eyes out :-) I will just say it sucks.