How offensive was I?

[Deleted]

I wouldn't be offended at all, but I guess it depends on the tone in which the question was asked. I don't really see this as an offensive question, though.

[Kristinmo]

I am overly sensitive about that question because I am young for the level of responsibility I have at work so I worry people are judging.

[rosiebear]

I don't see anything offensive about asking someone's age (although tone and context could each add offensiveness), but if people were volunteering their ages and he didn't volunteer it, I don't think you should have asked.

[Deleted]

I don't think it is offensive. If someone asks me my age and I don't want to answer I will say something like 'I'd like to plead the fifth on that' I don't get offended, I just don't answer.

[rosiebear]

Hmm. That doesn't sound assy at all. Dude's got issues, maybe. How do you know he was offended?

[Deleted]

Doesn't sound like you were out of line at all. My group compared ages yesterday to figure out who was youngest and nobody seemed upset. It's just a number.

[calle28]

I honestly don't think you did anything wrong.

He seems overly sensitive about it.

[jigsy]

He sounds stupid. LOL. That is my mature comment.

[Deleted]

My stupid rule of thumb is that it is ok to ask someone 35 or younger. Maybe just because I have always been in that group and happily share my age lol. I also think it is ok to ask someone their age if you are reasonably sure you are around the same age. So I would totally ask you your age but probably not a woman who appears to be middle aged. I guess because I assume young people are not sensitive about "getting old".

I think your question was appropriate especially in context and he is weird.

[sandyapples]

I don't think it was offensive in that context at all. I like people to know my age because I look way younger than I am (32). I see no advantage to people thinking I am 20.

[livinitup]

He has a hang-up about his age. Whatever.

[cuddlyevil]

Oct 21, 2014 18:56:38 GMT -5 intentionalsnarkshark said:

In that case, your response should have been," THAT'S IT. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN THE SPANK BANK."

This. Right here.

Dude is too sensitive.

[marylennox]

I would not find that offensive at all. That seems like a really strange way to react IMO.

[Deleted]

Oct 21, 2014 18:44:19 GMT -5 jigsy said:

He sounds stupid. LOL. That is my mature comment.

Damnit. You beat me to it.

[Deleted]

Is he the professional superior to anyone in the group? I have friends in supervisor or management positions that downplay their age at the office because they supervise older people who have issue with the age gap. They basically don't address it at all.

[Deleted]

His response was dumb, I just wonder if there's a particular reason why he might be sensitive.

[cleo29]

I don't think so. I am not bothered when people ask how old I am, I mean, it is what it is. lol

[olegregg]

I think he was a bit over the top with his response, especially after you revealed your younger (for the group) age. It's not like he was singled out as an oddball outlier or anything.

[pamela]

I hate the generic generational characteristics crap that gets pushed in the workplace. As one of a few millennials (borderline) in most of those situations and have to listen to what is essentially a company sanctioned bashing thanks to awful moderating, I am hypersensitive now. I would rather not discuss my actual age if I don't have to or it's not already known because it can carry a stigma of all the negative things I bet you discussed in that session

[irishbride2]

I admit it does bother me at work, simply because people assume I'm older than I am and then make a HUGE deal out of it when they find out. It hurts my credibility.

But I never let people know it bothers me. It is my own issue.

[mcc]

Wait mp so after he was offended, he still didn't tell you his age? That's just weird. He could just have easily been all nonchalant without giving it all away, "Nah, not alone, I'm an 80s baby too. I rocked my pint-sized jean jacket back in the day! (let's do it to TIffany)" --that still gives him 10 years to be vague about! Dude is weird.

[Deleted]

Oct 21, 2014 21:28:25 GMT -5 mcc said:

Wait mp so after he was offended, he still didn't tell you his age? That's just weird. He could just have easily been all nonchalant without giving it all away, "Nah, not alone, I'm an 80s baby too. I rocked my pint-sized jean jacket back in the day! (let's do it to TIffany)" --that still gives him 10 years to be vague about! Dude is weird.

This might be weirder.

[stellas]

Did you, like, turn to him directly after discussing how Gen X is blah blah blah and say "well what do you think, Ben?".

Because that would be clearly implying you think he's oldish.

[papie]

Maybe he is 22 and doesn't want anyone to know, lol.
Not offensive IMO.

[papie]

Oct 21, 2014 21:42:51 GMT -5 stellas said:

Did you, like, turn to him directly after discussing how Gen X is blah blah blah and say "well what do you think, Ben?".

Because that would be clearly implying you think he's oldish.

Shut up, gen X is NOT OLDISH.

[laddie]

Doesn't seem offensive to me as it was relevant to the conversation. I'm usually amused when someone asks my age and I tell them. Most people think I'm 5 years younger than I actually am.