jjwritergirl I feel guilty about things like that too. It makes me crazy if I think someone thought I didn't appreciate something.
I have some major ones. But I work really hard to make myself focus on the lesson learned and move forward on those lessons/i.e. be the better person. It's taken a lot of work. I have struggled from time to time...but I focus on that.
1. Situation Happens 2. Lesson Learned 3. Take the lesson and build on it/I.E. Stay in the present and focus on being that better person.
Thanks for your replies. Yeah, it's better not to dwell on the past and just focus on the lesson learned. I'm glad that we all have the ability to learn from experience, but I just hate the feeling of uncertainty.
I have a few, but I wouldn't trade any of them for where I am now.
1) I wish I had went to a 4 year college and joined a sorority. I've always wanted to have special relationships with college roomies. I didn't have a roommate my first year and then I transferred to another school and lived at home.
2) sometimes I wish I had of casually dated more, in the terms of just going out on dates not the scandalous things haha. But in my household growing up we didn't "casually date people" so that was never really an option. I love my husband dearly of course and wouldn't trade him for anything!
3) I wish I lived with a friend for a year or so and not lived at home until I got married.
travelbug College roommates aren't always wonderful! I had a decent roommate one year, a terrible roommate the next, and a room to myself the last two years. The second roommate made it practically unbearable to coexist with her in the same space. She kept trying to get me to join her campus religious group, but it wasn't my religion, so I declined...which made her very, very angry. She responded by making passive-aggressive comments to me under her breath all the time. She also almost never did her laundry and so the room smelled bad. Very bad. I may have sprayed Febreze in the general direction of her hamper a few times lol. This all just made me appreciate my single room that much more!
Anyway, all that to say - you may have dodged a bullet not having roommates!
@stargazer oh definitely, but on the other end of spectrum I have so many good friends who will be lifelong best friends with their roomies. It definitely could of been much worse haha!
Post by HoneySpider on Oct 28, 2014 13:42:21 GMT -5
I really try to not have regrets. I try to look at everything I've done and learn from it. I do feel I second-guess some decisions or wonder "what if." But in the end I always try to think that everything happens for a reason.
A big one for me was where I went to grad school. When I was in college I wanted to be a tv sports broadcaster and that's what I went to school for, did my internships in, etc. For grad school I got in to Syracuse which is arguably the best broadcast journalism program in the country. I was planning to go - my mom and I went up to visit and when we did I realized just how expensive it was going to be...as in, even with a shitload of loans from the school, my parents were still going to have to take out a personal loan from the bank. They told me that they would do whatever it took if I really wanted to go there but there was no way I could do it.
I'm going to cut out the middle part of this story but ultimately I ended up going to Tennessee because they offered me a graduate assistantship position which included full tuition plus a stipend for working part-time for the department. It was a good program, and I had a few professors I really liked (2 really stand out in my mind as extra awesome) but it was just not the same caliber program as Syracuse would have been. While I was in school I actually decided not to continue with broadcasting and instead go into working in sports.
I wonder A LOT about what might have been but I also have to remember that had I chosen a different path, my life could have been very different and maybe not in a good way (because really, who knows?). I definitely would not have met DH.
I have nothing huge, but wish I had studied abroad and moved to the city for a bit before settling in the burbs. And I wish I would have been less fearful and more adventurous.
I really wish I would have studied abroad. I really wanted to but balked at the cost. It turns out H and I were able to pay off our loans a lot sooner than anticipated, so it wouldn't have made a big difference money-wise in the grand scheme of things.
Post by estrellita on Oct 28, 2014 15:20:25 GMT -5
I agree with studying abroad. I wish I would have done a summer session but my parents didn't really like the idea so I never went through with it. It would have been 3 weeks I think in Greece and Italy. I really regret not doing that!
I'm gonna go with the yeah, I think about what might have been, but try not to "regret" the decisions we have made because who knows what would have happened if we changed our decisions.
That being said, I wish DH and I wouldn't have decided for him to quit his job on the wind towers. He had last worked in May 2011 and it was November 2011 and he still was waiting to get sent back out so he got a new job and we stayed local rather then continuing to travel. We were prepared financially for that time off but things were getting quite tight by then and thought maybe it's time to be home.
We had also had a conversation that we were wanting to TTC in 2012 so we wanted to be at home. Well in taking that job at home he more than cut his annual pay in half which very much put TTC on the back burner. It was a huge shock having such a lower paying job. We made it work, and thankfully had paid off a lot of debt while he was making good money, but we didn't have any extra at the end of the day. With those decisions we put TTC off another year and didn't start until 2013. Also, we didn't know we would have problems. Seeing all of that I wish we would have continued to travel longer and had more experiences in new places and more time to stock back the good money. He has since received a very nice raise, but is still 30k lower then what he made the last year he was on the towers.
I still wish we could go back to traveling at least weekly. We *could* do it, but it would be much more difficult. I would want to travel with him and as one of his bosses had said, babies are portable, but we no longer have someone living at our house watching over it and the dogs when we would be gone. I just wish we hadn't been in such a rush to move on to the next part of our lives and just really taken advantage of the opportunity to travel that most people don't get.
Post by spankswife on Oct 28, 2014 19:36:37 GMT -5
I regret not going off to college. But if I had, I would still have loans, would not have met DH, and would not have had my amazing job. I guess things happen for a reason.
Post by wanderingenough on Oct 28, 2014 19:50:26 GMT -5
Funny you posted this! I was listening a Darius Rucker song on the radio this morning ("This"). Anyhow, I was thinking how I really liked the lyrics because he was talking about how he doesn't regret choices he made because it got him to the situation he is in. That's how I try to look at things.
The main things I have trouble getting over are when I feel like I've hurt someone else. That stays with me for a long time.
Funny you posted this! I was listening a Darius Rucker song on the radio this morning ("This"). Anyhow, I was thinking how I really liked the lyrics because he was talking about how he doesn't regret choices he made because it got him to the situation he is in. That's how I try to look at things.
The main things I have trouble getting over are when I feel like I've hurt someone else. That stays with me for a long time.
Thank you for saying this. If I wish life were different I only wish it were if my H were still in the picture.
Funny you posted this! I was listening a Darius Rucker song on the radio this morning ("This"). Anyhow, I was thinking how I really liked the lyrics because he was talking about how he doesn't regret choices he made because it got him to the situation he is in. That's how I try to look at things.
The main things I have trouble getting over are when I feel like I've hurt someone else. That stays with me for a long time.
Thank you for saying this. If I wish life were different I only wish it were if my H were still in the picture.
I feel the same way! The path I took eventually led me to meeting my H, so it was worth it.