I forget, Stella's, what sort of pre-school environment was he in? Play-based, project-based learning? A more formalized, class structure?
What she sees as developing maturity might just be a new environment that he's becoming accustomed to.
I'm sorry you're stressing. I hate that feeling of trying to hear and determine what teachers and caregivers are saying, but also wanting to shield my sweet boy from all the things that I put on myself. ((Hugs))
He started out at 3 in a school that is a bit of an institution around here. They were great but very serious. I switched him to a reeaaallly relaxed preschool for prek, and he LOVED it there. Maybe they were too relaxed?
they were probably age appropriate but if he is coming from a more play based environwmnt he may just still be adjusting to this more structured class.
Post by speckledfrog on Oct 30, 2014 14:17:47 GMT -5
stellas, have you ever suspected that he has ADD? I mean, it doesn't magically appear when you are 5, there are indicators before then. My guess is that he falls within the real of typical development and she just has some unrealistic expectations for his temperament. I think at this point your best bet is to help him toe the line as best he can, but really focus on not letting her clouded perception of him crush his school experience.
As to why she's painting this kind of picture for you, I bet it's a case of CYA. No administration wants to hear, "This is a surprise! The teacher never said anything about this!"
Kindergarten was really rough for us. Noah was pretty immature (he turned 6 in July and is now in 1st grade so still young). It's hard, I wouldn't dismiss what the teacher said because of her delivery but just keep aware of what's going on at school and at home. Hang in there, you guys will get through it.
I forget, Stella's, what sort of pre-school environment was he in? Play-based, project-based learning? A more formalized, class structure?
What she sees as developing maturity might just be a new environment that he's becoming accustomed to.
I'm sorry you're stressing. I hate that feeling of trying to hear and determine what teachers and caregivers are saying, but also wanting to shield my sweet boy from all the things that I put on myself. ((Hugs))
He started out at 3 in a school that is a bit of an institution around here. They were great but very serious. I switched him to a reeaaallly relaxed preschool for prek, and he LOVED it there. Maybe they were too relaxed?
Nah, I think that's just his context and everyone might be coming from a different context. It sounds like it was a great program for 4-year olds. He might still be adjusting. Maturity on all sorts of different levels happens during these years. It's amazing the growth that is going on. A good friend was talking about her daughter a few weeks ago and how she meet with her 1st grade teacher several years ago, saying that her DD was probably going to be a sociopath with no friends, because she never seemed to care about friends or their feelings or "normal" things. The teacher just laughed and assured her that her daughter just needed to mature in her empathy and it would happen. Sure enough, it's 4 years later and her daughter is sweet and caring and empathetic and *not* a sociopath. We're all growing on a spectrum.
V is in a super-relaxed Reggio Emilia program and he kind of naturally is a bit of a dreamer/flighty, so I know it will be an adjustment when he goes to K. I think that is one thing to take into account and maybe talk in-person with the teacher about it.
Also, 4 and 5 year olds definitely start to develop a sort of natural jubilance and excitement around that age, especially with peers and cooperative play and learning. The teacher needs to continue to foster that, but also manage it within a structured setting. Everything she has described sounds within the bounds of typical development for a boy his age and with his experiences.
You are a legal secretary right? Maybe you should stick to typing and leave educating children to the people who have spent years in school learning how to do just that.
Says the person in finance that has no children? ^o)
I'm not understanding the venom for LHC from someone who has only been actively posting since April. Maybe I missed something under my rock? Is volsgirl a reincarnated poster?
Is it normal to have this type of communication via email? I don't have kids, so I don't know, but if I were a teacher, and had 'concerns', I'd prefer to talk about it in person. I don't care for her email:( Sorry Stellas:(
I haven't read much else (yes, I started at a random page in the middle of the thread) but absolutely should be done in person.
I realized she was being sarcastic with the "lot's". She just screwed up her grammer (and/or was typing fast and not putting too much effort into an internet msg board:-) with the "to". It happens.
no, the teacher misused "to" as well. Pretty sure that's where it came from and was no mistake and was, indeed, part of the joke.
I don't think the comment about speaking with the doctor has anything to do with a diagnosis; you were asking about developmental concerns and if you approached your doctor, he/she would be able to tell you if the behaviors were developmentally appropriate/normal. Teachers can't diagnose (which I don't think she was suggesting that), we can only give you feedback and our observations.
Also, holding a kid back in kindergarten if he isn't ready to move onto first grade isn't a big deal. He would be 18 going into his senior year and 19 when he graduated opposed to 17 entering and 18 graduating. Ultimately though, this decision will be yours. They can make suggestions, but I don't think they can make him stay in Kindergarten (I might be off here).
My biggest concern would be that you found the trouble areas on the report card and she hadn't contacted you about them. BUT, if the trouble areas were truly that big of a concern, she probably would have called you about them.
If you're able, go in one or two days to observe his behaviors.
Post by TrudyCampbell on Oct 30, 2014 20:05:56 GMT -5
I'm late here, but this email would have upset me, Stellas. I think the teacher is really over stepping by implying she knows anything about diagnosing your child with a medical disorder. I feel really heated and this has nothing to do with me.
I'm sorry he's struggling and I hope he just needs some time to adjust. My kid is 2.5 and we're already considering holding her back a year from K and it is very stressful. Hugs.