My Awful Coworker: An Odyssey

[Deleted]

Today I was told I shouldn't make small talk or pleasantries with people, because I might rub them the wrong way and everyone here is very serious until they get to know you (this isn't true.). She couldn't point out an example of me rubbing anyone the wrong way, and it was even weirder because I was just at my desk. Alone. Not talking to anyone. Haven't all morning because it's 9/80 day and the office is ghost town. 

Oh, and I should never go to my boss about anything ever. Just her. He would hate me if I came to him if I had a problem. Like, really hate me and think poorly of me as a worker, and I wouldn't want that. So just tell her all my issues, and she'll take care of them, because they're very close. But never tell anyone else.


So in summary: Don't communicate with anyone except her, eye contact and general acknowledgements are for dirty, dirty whores. 

[malibu]

Oh. Oh my.

[bittybomb]

She sounds like an idiotic asshole.

[Deleted]

Bitch be crazy.

[Deleted]

It's like I'm living in the first 20 minutes of a Lifetime movie as the supportive boyfriend turns into an abusive crazy person.

[gozf]

She is bonkers!

[sandytoes]

Wuuuuutt?? This sounds like Single White Female. Let us know when she changes her hair to match yours and starts dressing like you.

[aussiecrush]

Well it was very nice of her to let you know to start documenting her crazy right away.

[everyjuan]

That bitch cray.

[cuddlyevil]

Please C&P my siggy into an email and send it her way.

[sugarbear]

Is she your supervisor in any capacity? Older? More experienced?
(Not that age and experience would excuse her craziness. I'm just trying to understand why she might think this is ok.)

[Deleted]

Nov 21, 2014 11:13:11 GMT -5 sandytoes said:

Wuuuuutt?? This sounds like Single White Female. Let us know when she changes her hair to match yours and starts dressing like you.

Oh, she doesn't like me. I think she's generally indifferent to my existence. But she's a bitch at the office and in her weirdo Hunger Games-ish shit in her head no one else can be too comfortable with me because trust, she's all about controlling the dialogue and since I know exactly what she does all day she can't have me running around without a leash. 

It's very healthy. 

[cville]

Hey look!  I found the Christmas present she bought you!

[Serenity9]

[captainobvious]

[Deleted]

Nov 21, 2014 11:15:17 GMT -5 sugarbear said:

Is she your supervisor in any capacity? Older? More experienced?
(Not that age and experience would excuse her craziness. I'm just trying to understand why she might think this is ok.)

She's a year older than me, I have a smidge more experience than her. She's been at this company for a year and a half. 

She's the Team Lead, but I don't actually answer to her, we're considered equals. I had this verified with both the recruiter and our boss. 

[Saint Monica]

Betty, just admit your small talk is weird/offensive. We all know it.

[sandytoes]

Nov 21, 2014 11:16:29 GMT -5 @bettyhomewrecker33 said:

Nov 21, 2014 11:13:11 GMT -5 sandytoes said:

Wuuuuutt?? This sounds like Single White Female. Let us know when she changes her hair to match yours and starts dressing like you.

Oh, she doesn't like me. I think she's generally indifferent to my existence. But she's a bitch at the office and in her weirdo Hunger Games-ish shit in her head no one else can be too comfortable with me because trust, she's all about controlling the dialogue and since I know exactly what she does all day she can't have me running around without a leash. 

It's very healthy. 

Dafuq? Is she like this with other people?

[Saint Monica]

[hereigo]

Dude, the fuck?!

[cereal K]

Someone is threatened by the new girl! She sounds like she has control issues and wants to keep you from completely outshining her. Which will be an impossible task.

[Deleted]

Wow, that's a boat load of crazy. She can just fuck right off with that "advice".

[agnes]

Nov 21, 2014 11:29:37 GMT -5 Saint Monica said:

I wish some of my coworkers had read this. 

[agnes]

srsly, though. betty, make sure you watch your back with this lady.

[psychmom]

Are you able to talk to HR about this chick? Because the amount of crazy going on here is off the charts.

[cuddlyevil]

You need to play this on a loop. "Don't bother me, I'm workin'"

[sugarbear]

Nov 21, 2014 11:23:47 GMT -5 @bettyhomewrecker33 said:

Nov 21, 2014 11:15:17 GMT -5 sugarbear said:

Is she your supervisor in any capacity? Older? More experienced?
(Not that age and experience would excuse her craziness. I'm just trying to understand why she might think this is ok.)

She's a year older than me, I have a smidge more experience than her. She's been at this company for a year and a half. 

She's the Team Lead, but I don't actually answer to her, we're considered equals. I had this verified with both the recruiter and our boss. 

She is whacko.
And will you tell your boss about this conversation? Does s/he favor your coworker in any way?

[bania]

Okay maybe SHE rubbed people the wrong way and has no clue it's her, not them, and is actually trying to be helpful?

Naww, she's crazy.

[sandyapples]

Maybe everyone else in your office IS insane and she is just trying to protect you!

[luckyval]

She's....speshul