Would you invite lonely friend to Turkey day?

[notsocreepylurker]

Something on my mind today - just wondering what others think.

You have a friend who lives alone.  Family is 1000 miles away.  She never takes off around Thanksgiving (because her coworkers have kids who are off from school so she lets them have the days) so she cannot fly to be with her family for the holiday.  Would you invite her to your house for Thanksgiving? (assuming you are hosting)

[pamela]

Absolutely. And even if I wasn't hosting and my family was local, I'd invite them to come with my family.

[jillboston]

Yes. It is nice of you to think of her.

[tacosforlife]

Yes!

A couple years ago, a friend of a friend invited me and several friends to his Thanksgiving. I was very grateful and had a great time!

[orangeblossom]

Absolutely. I and my family are always inviting people to Thanksgiving dinner.

I just saw a story about a homeless man in VA that put an ad on a local news stations FB page asking for a family to host him for Thanksgiving, and that he's lonely every day, but Thanksgiving and Christmas are the worst days for him. A family did invite him.

It certainly makes me realize how thankful I am for the family that I have.

[mmmomof2]

Yes, I read in an article that you should always have a non-family member present at Thanksgiving. It keeps your family on their best behavior. LOL.

But truthfully, my family are such weirdos I'd be reluctant.

[StrawberryBlondie]

Yes. Absolutely. We're almost never home on Thanksgiving, though. So I probably wouldn't invite her over to SIL's though.

[ChillyMcFreeze]

Absolutely. My family's Thanksgiving is made up entirely of "orphans" most years, because it's just me, H, and my parents. It's nice for us to have different faces at the table, and I'm sure having a "family" for the holidays means a lot.

[KateAggie]

Yes. Absolutely. My favorite Thanksgiving memories include friends.

[Velvetshady]

Do it.

When my parents were still living overseas, a couple of us would host an open T-giving. We'd set a time food would be ready bu and any and everyone was invited to come by. We had friends/coworkers/classmates/neighbors with no local family come, friends that weren't getting along with family, friends that needed a break from their family...we even had a couple times when a friends parents were divorcing and the friend bought the parent with no local family along.

Those were my favorite t-givings.

[sugarglider]

Certainly! I've spent a number of Thanksgivings away from home and have appreciated others welcoming me into their homes. Last year, I actually attended a thanksgiving hosted by friends of a friend I had never met. Our mutual friend was out of town but was looking out for me.

[Deleted]

Nov 22, 2014 9:27:32 GMT -5 mmmomof2 said:

Yes, I read in an article that you should always have a non-family member present at Thanksgiving. It keeps your family on their best behavior. LOL.

But truthfully, my family are such weirdos I'd be reluctant.

Awesome logic, although I'm with you. My in-laws' crazy can't be contained enough to introduce strangers. The years it's my family or the years we celebrate with good friends? I'd do it without thinking twice, as would my family and friends.

[scout8]

Of course!

[secretlyevil]

Yes, absolutely.

[msmerymac]

Yes.

But when I lived in CA, "orphan Thanksgiving" was a really common concept. Most of my friends weren't from SoCal originally and many had jobs which made it difficult to travel for the holiday, so we either had our own celebrations or were invited to celebrate with families of friends who had local relatives. I spent several holidays with my friend's mom and stepdad.

[315]

Definitely. Growing up, we always had stragglers for Thanksgiving. My mom is a professor and many of her international students would not know what Thanksgiving was or had the traditional foods. We had them over for dinner. Sometimes they brought a dish as well. Some of those were my favorite memories of Thanksgiving.

[cattledogkisses]

Of course! I often brought home "orphans" when I was in college and had friends who couldn't make it home for the holiday. We're a "the more, the merrier" kind of family.

[notsocreepylurker]

Thanks all for answering.

For clarification - I am the lonely girl. I've been in Houston for 7 years now and have never been invited to a friend's house for Thanksgiving. I never really thought anything of it - T-day was never a big holiday for me (especially since I don't like potatoes or pie) but reading something on another board made me think maybe I should ask my friends if I could crash their Tday. I guess I always thought it'd be a pity invite - not a real one. But I am not right in the head all the time so I know that's on me.

[moolarkey]

Why wouldn't you?

[Miss Phryne Fisher]

Invite her! If she is hermity or doesn't like the holiday, she will turn you down but I bet she will appreciate the gesture. I was in a similar situation my first 3 years after college, and I had a work friend who always invited me for Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner. I always went and had a great time.

[Cicero]

Absolutely. We have a recently relocated expat colleague and his family coming over.

[meshaliuknits]

I would not because thanksgiving at my house would probably depress her more than missing family. Aside from the sweet potatoes. Those are pretty good.

But I'd let anyone who asked come over.

Sent from my EVO

[Deleted]

I grew up in a military family, am still kind of sort of in one. If we're hosting, we try to find someone to invite. Or people invite us. This year my friend knows I'm working most of the day and has invited us to come over. I'm pretty sure the husband and kids will go over while i'm at work and I'll head over afterwards.

[315]

Nov 22, 2014 10:40:46 GMT -5 notsocreepylurker said:

Thanks all for answering.

For clarification - I am the lonely girl. I've been in Houston for 7 years now and have never been invited to a friend's house for Thanksgiving. I never really thought anything of it - T-day was never a big holiday for me (especially since I don't like potatoes or pie) but reading something on another board made me think maybe I should ask my friends if I could crash their Tday. I guess I always thought it'd be a pity invite - not a real one. But I am not right in the head all the time so I know that's on me.

No, not at all. I think you should ask around. It's not a pity invite if you offer to help cook or bring something. Especially if you have a friend that sounds like they need help or are feeling overwhelmed with cooking the meal. Then, really, you're the savior.

[josieposy]

Sure!

[ChillyMcFreeze]

I'm sorry you're in that position, but I think most people just assume everyone has plans. If a friend or co-worker told me they were looking for an invitation, my reaction would be "Oh my God, of COURSE you should come join us. See you at 6!" Because I could not abide knowing someone was alone for Thanksgiving.

[gpw]

I'm pretty much alone on T-giving this year. I'm still holding onto hope that I can pawn my mom off on my brother...which is unlikely,but still. It's different because I'm looking forward to it, but I don't see anything wrong with inviting someone, or asking for an invite.

[Vespasia]

Nov 22, 2014 11:16:09 GMT -5 ChillyMcFreeze said:

I'm sorry you're in that position, but I think most people just assume everyone has plans. If a friend or co-worker told me they were looking for an invitation, my reaction would be "Oh my God, of COURSE you should come join us. See you at 6!" Because I could not abide knowing someone was alone for Thanksgiving.

I agree. You have to put yourself out there, people don't automatically assume you have no plans. 


I definitely invited myself and H to a friend's this year and if that doesn't work out we will do it to another set of friends. I have no shame when there is a feast involved. 

[NewOrleans]

Without a doubt.

I have been the lonely friend invited once for Easter. It was an act of kindness from 12 years ago that I still think of with gratitude.

[jlt19]

Aw, I wish we were closer, I'd invite you over! I actually invited a family of 4 to our house b/c they were originally going to drive to Buffalo. But, they are still going (I guess their family lives north so only got a foot of snow?)