Edward Gorey goes up to the counter and orders a venti cappuccino. There is a sickly-sweet scent in the air. Basil and Clarence are playing charades, although Maude appears to be winning. Gorey grows suspicious of the mustachioed man in the corner, who has been writing a long list for the past several minutes. He exits the shop and heads for the train tracks. Perhaps the man who is chasing him will grow tired.
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Nathaniel Hawthorne goes up to the counter and orders a cappuccino. The barista spells his name without the “w.” Hawthorne refuses to take the drink.
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Willa Cather goes up to the counter and orders a blonde roast to go. She takes her travel cup and begins the long walk to the prairie. By the time she gets there, the coffee has gone cold, but it’s a good kind of cold. The kind that reminds us of nature’s authority. She sips it and gazes out at the countryside. The corn shudders under the setting sun. She’s content.
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Jane Eyre goes up to the counter and orders a venti earl grey tea. It is raining outside. The barista is ugly and cold to her, but she falls in love with him anyway. There is a banging from the back room of the Starbucks, but the barista seems unconcerned. “It won’t affect me bringing you your coffee,” he assures Jane. He is wrong about this.
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Laura Ingalls Wilder goes up to the counter and orders a small cup of extra hot coffee. She sits down at a table in the Starbucks she has built for herself out of sod from the prairie. She writes a letter to her family. It’s going to be a long winter.
Victor Hugo goes up to the counter and orders a coffee. The barista points out the special on their French presses. Victor turns and gazes blankly at the shelves as a lone tear trickles down his face. He takes his steaming coffee outside and gives it to the homeless young boy shivering in rags outside before proceeding to a nearby dumpster to begin construction on a barricade.
George R.R. Martin goes up to the counter and orders a series of incredibly complicated drinks, each more detailed and layered than the last. The barista works for an hour and finally hands them across the counter to Martin, who promptly throws one of them away with little to no explanation. That coffee had been the barista’s favorite.
George R.R. Martin goes up to the counter and orders a series of incredibly complicated drinks, each more detailed and layered than the last. The barista works for an hour and finally hands them across the counter to Martin, who promptly throws one of them away with little to no explanation. That coffee had been the barista’s favorite.