daycare woes

[cowboyjoe]

I need a reality check on daycare to see if I'm just being a crazy FTM.  Would these things bother you?

1.  When we came in the room at drop off there were 3 caregivers and 8 children.  As we were unbuckling our baby the lead teacher said she would be right back and left the room.  We left our baby, which made them over the ratio.  I assumed the teacher was coming right back, but she was still chatting to other employees near the entrance of the center when we left.  Drop off took us a little bit longer that day, and the front of the center is quite a ways from the infant room.  I am 95% sure they were over the ratio again this morning at drop off, but couldn't see all the kids.

2.  At pick up, my baby was swaddled and sleeping in the swing.  It is against state regulations and is even posted on their door that swings are not safe sleeping areas and is not allowed.  Because she was swaddled, it makes me think she was placed there specifically to sleep.  DD is too old to be swaddled per the state.  Sleeping swaddled and in a swing does not bother me and we do it at home, but it makes me wonder what other regulations they are ignoring. I have seen children sleeping in the swing on multiple occasions, but always assumed they had just fallen asleep there while playing until I saw my own child swaddled in the swing.

3.  At pickup this week a child was there that had thrown up a couple hours ago.  They did not call the parents because of the time of day.  I did overhear that the child will not be allowed back tomorrow.  The child was running around the classroom with other kids and had 2 other children's pacifiers - one in his mouth and one in his hand. 

4.  They speak pretty harshly about the pacifier-stealing child in front of us.  The other day I observed them raise their voice at him for taking pacifiers.  On our first day he pulled himself up using a swing and fell and hit his head on the corner of the refrigerator door.  They did not go check to see if he was ok.  Last week the lead teacher made fun of him for still drinking formula at 13 months.  These are not my child's direct caregivers but she is in the same room and she will switch to them once she becomes mobile.  I wonder what they say about my parenting when I am not there?  It just doesn't seem to be a very caring environment.

5.  Not all of the teachers know the name of my child, or which child belongs to me.  She has been there for almost a month.  One teacher admitted she couldn't tell the 3 little girls apart.  This again was not my child's primary caregiver, but they are in the same room and these teachers do interact with her.

I really enjoy DD's primary caregiver, but I feel like there are too many other issues to leave her there.  This is supposed to be the 2nd best center in the area.  It came highly recommended from multiple people and we are paying a premium to be there.  Center #1 is $300 more per month.  I just can't shake the feeling that I'm unhappy with her care.  Am I being a helicopter mom or are these legitimate issues?

[pugz]

Start looking sorry

[zarapipe]

Yep- all of that would bug me. All of the issues together would tell me to switch and not even to try to rectify. That's a lot of stuff.

[megs193]

That is way too many issues for me to be comfortable. I would definitely start looking for a new place.

[buffysummers]

I would definitely start looking, sorry. 3 and 4 are really not ok, and I would not be comfortable sending my kid there.

[spk926]

Those are legitimate issues. If that is what happenswhen you're there what (else) happens when you're not.

You should have full trust and confidence in the people taking care of your child and given those examples I wouldn't. At all. When you leave make sure to tell them why.

Sent from my SM-G900P using proboards

[Deleted]

I would start looking for a different daycare. There are too many issues, and a couple of the issues are especially unsettling.

[kermit]

I'd also start looking for something else.

[sent]

Most of what you wrote bothers me but about the vomiting child - DD threw up a lot at daycare. It took us weeks to pinpoint that the vomit was because she was drinking whole milk. She was otherwise fine. If they had called me every time, I would have worked zero days in December.

Daycare just asked us to send more long sleeves bibs and back up outfits.

This now makes her a formula drinking 13 month old. From a bottle. Oh the horrors and I feel sad that a child care provider would mock that.

[undecidedowl]

Any one of those items on its own would annoy me but I could get over it or talk with them about it. Together, it's too much. You don't want to doubt the care your child is getting. So sorry you are dealing with this.

[cjeanette]

I wouldn't go back

[gingerjar]

I would look for another center.

[Deleted]

Oh wow I'm sorry. That's not good.

[bronxgirl]

This is all bothers me, but I find #4 particularly concerning. I would definitely look for something else.

[elocrates]

We've now had kids in childcare for nearly 7 years and I've learned a lot about what my personal comfort level and boundaries are with things. I've also become more laid back over time. However, there are just too many things combined that you posted. Follow your gut on this one. I'd be looking for other care right away.

[cowboyjoe]

Thanks for validating my feelings on this. DH and I are going to figure out what to do this weekend. He has noticed other things as well.

Gah, this working mom stuff is hard!

[lilac05]

Legitimate issues. I'd look for another place.

I'm sorry. I know finding/switching daycare is stressful. Even if they weren't legitimate issues, if you're not happy with the place, you need to switch.

[dcn]

Separately I could be ok but all together, nope. I'd look for another arrangement:/

[stealthmom]

Look into inhomes. You might find something you really like. For financial reasons we went inhome with ds2. Since ds1 was in a center I was not thrilled but I've discovered I much prefer it.

[Deleted]

I would be raging because of points 4 and 5.

[browneyedgirl9]

Yeah start looking. Sorry, but these are red flags to me

[mannah]

I would just like to add, what kind of asshole makes fun of a baby for anything??? What the fucking fuck.

Sorry you're going through this but glad you've decided to move.

[Deleted]

Go with your gut on this.

One of the list, independently, I could shrug off. But taken together, no.

[july]

You get that list on a month? Yes, I would leave with all those things.

[catsarecute]

I'm so sorry you have had to experience this all in such a short time! I agree with everyone else that you should start looking around. No place is perfect but you shouldn't be able to create a list of things that bother you. That is saying a lot. I hope you find another center for your baby soon.

[meij]

I'm usually on the 'guys chill out its not that big of deal' side of things but all those things would bother me. A lot.



They sound like they just do not care.

[thecatinthehat]

Everything together would make me start looking and hope to find something quickly. I am not comfortable at all. 8 babies and they can't tell 3 of the girls apart?

[AmyRI]

I'd start looking elsewhere. I'd also consider raising these issues with the director so they know that their staff is acting unprofessionally.

[gibbinator]

That list just really keeps going...

[pinotgrig]

That's a big list of big issues.

I would definitely look to move. I'm sorry you're dealing with this.