Ugh, your mom is wrong, crazy, an idiot and a bitch. You are gorgeous, and she must have serious issues to say this to her own daughter.
PLEASE remember that you are gorgeous and your mom is saying this because of her own body issues. I'm sorry she's saying things that hurt you; they are not true!
Post by whiskeyandwine on Feb 1, 2015 10:27:57 GMT -5
OMFG Sally, I'm so sorry that she would 1.) say something like that about you and 2.) REPEAT IT TO YOU! I really hope that you're able to tell her how hurtful that is to you.
FWIW, I think you're so beautiful. I hope that you're able to find and surround yourself with friends who love and respect the person that you are today.
I'm so sorry. A mother should not say anything this hurtful about her daughter. Ever. I would be so offended and hurt if my mom said something like this about me and I actually AM heavy.
You are beautiful and she is projecting her own issues onto you.
No one can be that obtuse. A comment like that can only come from a place of many, many issues:(. I'm sorry you have to deal with that. And even sorrier if it hurt you (even though you know it's her insecurity talking and absolutely false, right??)
I can't decide which is shittier, the fact that your mom said that to your friend in the first place or that she then felt the need to repeat it to you.
Thanks guys. It's just so hard when someone says out loud the negative things you think about yourself. It makes it feel like it's true.
You very likely feel this way because your Mom had been saying this to you, and herself, your whole life. Her body issues are now your issues. Have you ever told her that she is hurting you and to keep this shit to herself?
I told her yesterday that she shouldn't say that and she said she was just telling the truth! If she isn't going to tell me who will?
Yea she is. It's not as bad because my sister is thin.
This has nothing to do with being thin or fat. Your mom has issues and has done some damage to you. I have been there. You need to explore this in therapy because its not going to go away when you drop those 10 pounds you think you need to lose.
I know. I've been thinking about therapy for awhile. I don't know why I don't just do it.
You very likely feel this way because your Mom had been saying this to you, and herself, your whole life. Her body issues are now your issues. Have you ever told her that she is hurting you and to keep this shit to herself?
I told her yesterday that she shouldn't say that and she said she was just telling the truth! If she isn't going to tell me who will?
The same crap that people said above.
Okay, nope.
This is not "honesty." This is a woman desperately trying to hold onto her own youth and taking her own feelings of inadequacy and throwing them on someone she should be lifting up.
It's pure fucking bullshit.
I would definitely consider counseling for you, because it sounds like she has spent a lot of time tearing you down. And, I would - if you can - tell her that you are not interested in interacting with her. That her words are not just immature and cruel, but also untrue. You are beautiful just the way you are, and if she is going to spend her time trying to convince you otherwise, you're not interested in having her in your life. (Easier said than done, I know.)
That is so hurtful, I'm sorry. My mom also makes comments about my weight all the time. She seems to expect me to stay the size I was when I was 17 for my whole life. She hasn't, so I don't know why she's so hard on me. It's painful.
Post by shamrockshake on Feb 1, 2015 11:30:05 GMT -5
OMG my eyes bugged out if my head, I am so sorry your mom thinks that's ok to say! And also, this is beside the point but I'm fairly certain you've posted pics before and it's not even remotely true either!
Even if she does, in my opinion you have been the recipient of conditional love, if you are (her idea of) thin the. She is nicer, and easier on you.
But Sally. You ARE thin, and you have such a beautiful character. You are funny, and nice, and respectful, and compassionate. You are the things she isn't. You have always been supportive to women here when they post pictures or describe self image issues. And while I know that a parent (especially your mother) makes those kinds,of hurtful statements it's hard to ignore them, but... She is talking about herself.
You are lovely. And it is more than your hip circumference, or the numbers on the scale, or how damn gorgeous your face is. YOU are a lovely person, inside and out,. And you certainly have our love.
She does tell me and I know she does. She just has always been like this about my weight/looks.
You very likely feel this way because your Mom had been saying this to you, and herself, your whole life. Her body issues are now your issues. Have you ever told her that she is hurting you and to keep this shit to herself?
I told her yesterday that she shouldn't say that and she said she was just telling the truth! If she isn't going to tell me who will?
The same crap that people said above.
She is not telling you the truth.
I have seen your picture, and the TRUTH is that you are beautiful. The TRUTH is that it is normal to have gained weight since high school, especially if you were very thin and athletic in high school. The TRUTH is that your relationships with your loved ones should not be defined by your weight, or any other physical characteristic and it is (truthfully!) sad that your mother doesn't see this.
I hope you that you are able to remember that your mother doesn't speak the truth. She speaks her insecurity and judgment and dissatisfaction. You owe it to yourself, and to your beautiful daughter, to find your own, new truth about what is important in our lives - and it is NOT the number on a scale.
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