I asked my husband for a divorce this morning

[excited30]

My heart feels ripped in two. We've been married 7.5 years and have an almost 3yr old daughter. I never thought I would be in this position. This is a guy that I will always love. We just hurt each other and have for too long...complicated, but when is it not? I know in my head that I made the right choice, but my heart does not. My heart wants to shove the pain away and pretend this isn't happening and call him and make everything 'ok.' Which it is far from not. This is my bottom.

Can I please join you?

[abcdefu]

Welcome! I'm sorry you are here. That is the hardest conversation ever. I promise it gets better. This board, and the ladies here are a great source of support. ((hugs))

[idahome]

Welcome to the board. Kudos to you for having the hard conversation. It's a long journey so be kind to yourself!

[bl]

Welcome to the board. So sorry you're going through this, but this is a great board for support.

[Emerald1486]

Sorry you are going through this. Welcome to the board. There are many of us in different stages; some still going through it, other long since. It took 7 months for my heart and head to come to the agreement that divorce was best.
It gets better.

[1confused1]

Welcome. Sorry you're here.

[redshoejune]

I'm sorry you're hurting. The whole process sucks

[bbaggins]

((big hugs and a glass of wine))

[WinterIsComing]

Sorry you're here but welcome!! It might now seem like it now but slowly your heart will start to feel what your head already know. It just takes time.

[Deleted]

Welcome. Sorry for what you're going through but hang in there.

[tiffany81]

((hugs)) I'm so sorry you're here, but welcome. Hang in there.

[Deleted]

Welcome.  I'm sorry.  I know it really sucks, but it gets better.

[excited30]

Thank you ladies for all your kind words and even just the assurance that my heart will catch up and it's normal for them not to be in sync. I've been having a slide show of snapshots memories going through my mind all day just bring the constant tears... a second day of full crying for me.

[greencrayon]

I'm 2 weeks out from a separation. I often get this "jk, come into bed with me. It's lonely and our marriage was not THAT bad" I have this mantra of things that he's done and how much better I'm going to be without him, which helps.

You mentioned in your other post that you feel cold. I get that occasionally. I usually take a hot shower and listen to Bruno Mars , Vance Joy and Taylor Swift and dance naked in the shower. Lol. I'm trying to take it one day at a time. Good luck

[excited30]

Feb 28, 2015 6:42:05 GMT -5 greencrayon said:

I'm 2 weeks out from a separation. I often get this "jk, come into bed with me. It's lonely and our marriage was not THAT bad" I have this mantra of things that he's done and how much better I'm going to be without him, which helps.

You mentioned in your other post that you feel cold. I get that occasionally. I usually take a hot shower and listen to Bruno Mars , Vance Joy and Taylor Swift and dance naked in the shower. Lol. I'm trying to take it one day at a time. Good luck

Thank you for your advice.  And I'm sorry you are going through this too. This is the 3rd day and I've still been feeling cold.  Not quite as cold, but still cold.  I even took as hot a bath as I could mid day...it's sort of warmed me, but when I got out I was still cold again.  I think my body's just in the high stress state.  and Yah... I keep wanting to make it better and have him back (just for the good times), but then I have these tiny memories of the bad things and how much emotional pain I've been in and I physically stop myself from calling him

[onedayatatime]

Sorry you find yourself here - but welcome. It is a difficult time - but things will get better.

The cold numb feeling will ease up when you are ready, just hang in there.

[becwheat]

Hey lady. I am sorry you are here, but welcome.

[Deleted]

Welcome, this is the hard part. My therapist told me the hardest part is reaching & speaking the decision. I think she's right.

It gets better and easier after some time. You're not alone, hugs.

[excited30]

Mar 1, 2015 16:59:31 GMT -5 @blushnbashful said:

Welcome, this is the hard part. My therapist told me the hardest part is reaching & speaking the decision. I think she's right.

It gets better and easier after some time. You're not alone, hugs.

It was VERY hard to reach this decision and become brave enough to speak up.  We have been in separate living places now for 3 years but still in each others lives almost every day or couple days. I was terrified to say the word and go through the talk.  I was starting to have anxiety attacks and realized that I had to choose over my mental health going bad, or facing the inevitable and getting back on the road to wellness.