Thursday randoms!!

[alleinesein]

Mar 25, 2015 23:26:23 GMT -5 mp said:

Mar 25, 2015 23:21:16 GMT -5 pandora said:

Ask them to communicate to you in writing only going forward? Should make them think before communicating. Glad you have your own place to do what you want now. In our state if they don't return the deposit or provide an itemized listing of costs deducted from your deposit within 30 days, you are due double your security. Check on that in your state.

I will check the rules on what happens if they go too long - it's 21 days here. It's only been 4 days so far.

It's just so many personal judgements about everything, and I am stressed. My house may smell like dog but it didn't smell like dog urine. Seriously - accidents were rare. So the "The house smells like urine how could you not notice?!" comments are misplaced, looking for reasons to take my deposit, and just personally offensive. But like I said, since I had an extra dog I also don't want to fight about any dog issues since I was also in the wrong and if push came to shove there's no way to prove my side. So whatever - do whatever you need and take it out of my deposit.

Its 21 days.  XH and I ended up taking our previous LL to small claims court over our deposit.  I spent lots of time reading up on tenants rights and they ended up having to give us our full deposit because they screwed up and we had tons of documentation.


Landlords must follow strict guidelines in order to retain any portion of a tenant’s security deposit


The refund of the security deposit is one of the most contentious issues in landlord-tenant litigation. California has enacted laws to protect tenants by requiring landlords to comply with very strict guidelines in order to legally retain any portion of a tenant’s security deposit.


Allowable deductions from the security deposit: A landlord may deduct from the security deposit only those amounts which are reasonably necessary for the following purposes:

-The compensation of a landlord for a tenant’s default in the payment of rent.

-The repair of damages to the premises, exclusive of ordinary wear and tear, caused by the tenant or by a guest of the tenant.

-The cleaning of the premises upon termination of the tenancy necessary to return the unit to the same level of cleanliness it was in at the beginning of the tenancy, but only for tenancies that began after 1/1/2003.

-To remedy future defaults by the tenant in any obligation under the rental agreement to restore, replace, or return personal property or appurtenances, exclusive of ordinary wear and tear, if the security deposit is authorized to be applied thereto by the rental agreement.


The landlord may not use the security deposit for any of the following purposes:

-Damages or defective conditions that preexisted the tenancy;

-Ordinary wear and tear or the effects thereof, whether the wear and tear preexisted the tenancy or occurred during the tenancy, or for the cumulative effects of ordinary wear and tear occurring during any one or more tenancies.


Guidelines for the return of a tenant’s security deposit


Pre-move out inspection right: The landlord must notify the tenant in writing of the tenant’s right to a pre-move out inspection before the tenancy ends. The purpose of the inspection is to allow the tenant an opportunity to remedy identified deficiencies in order to avoid deductions from the security. It’s a good idea to avail yourself of this right because it will give you a chance to collect evidence against the landlord’s claims while you still have access to the unit.


Security deposit must be returned within 21 calendar days: No later than 21 calendar days after the tenant moves out, the landlord must give the tenant a written, itemized explanation of any money he intends to deduct from the tenant’s security deposit, either by first class mail or personal delivery. The landlord must send this notice and all notices related to the security deposit to the address provided by the tenant. If the tenant has not provided an address, the landlord must send it to address vacated by the tenant. Any portion of the security deposit unaccounted for in the itemized deduction must be returned to the tenant.


If the landlord intends to keep more than $125, he or she must provide documentation justifying the deduction. If the landlord intends to keep any amount over $125, he must provide the tenant receipts and copies of documents showing charges actually incurred and deducted by the landlord.


A landlord who keeps the tenant’s security deposit in violation of the law may be required to pay the tenant double the security deposit in addition to actual damages: A landlord’s bad faith retention of the security deposit may subject the landlord to statutory damages of up to twice the amount of the security, in addition to actual damages.

[jenstar]

That sucks mp, hope they get their shit together. How frustrating for you.

What do you need the back brace for pandora? That sounds like a bit of a pain, I hope you're not in pain! Also, where are you? I have never seen a random thread started so early! It's just after 4pm here and usually they don't start until I'm in bed.

I am having a boring day, working and trying not to eat too much since everything seems to make me nauseous atm but I'm pretty hungry.. I get to pick DS up in an hour, I hope he's had a good day, I hate the new room leader at his DCP so I don't look forward to pick up as much right now, which sucks.

Hope everyone has a good day

[excited30]

I am surprised to see this Thurs thread already too...it's only 10:30pm Wed where I am. So, my Thursday hasn't begun yet, but soon I'll be in bed. I am not looking forward to beginning my morning as I have been sleeping in for the last week + and tomorrow is a sudden early one with an appointment and I don't want to drag my daughter out of the house... boo! BUT once out and after an appointment we will be out on a hike with other toddlers and preschoolers. Should be fun and beautiful. Have a great day everyone.

[cuddlyevil]

I have to find my desk today. I need an adult.

[starburst604]

I still have this shitty cold and I'm taking a sick day, which I never do. I swear calling in sick gives me such anxiety which is ridiculous. I'm entitled to be sick too, and especially need to take care of myself now.

[Eureka1984]

So another buyer made an offer on my house. This person is a property flipper and would put a new roof on the house. I'm hoping he will accept my counter offer. I would like to get back a little bit of money. Fingers crossed!

[bl]

mp I am sorry they are doing that, making such harsh comments like that is so shitty

I spent the first hour of my day on the phone with IT because my email crashed, but its fixed now.

The guy I went out with Tuesday (I will refer to him as golfer from now on) and I are going to dinner and then a comedy show tonight. I am counting down the time until the work day is over.

[bg]

It's Breakfast Club day! Excited to see it on the big screen tonight.

[jojoandleo]

My anxiety is through the roof for some reason. I have been nauseous all week. I don't know why and I don't know what to do to stop it. I haven't slept through the night in over 7 nights. I am getting tired of waking up in the middle of the night, stressed.

[lookingup]

Mar 26, 2015 9:00:08 GMT -5 jojoandleo said:

My anxiety is through the roof for some reason. I have been nauseous all week. I don't know why and I don't know what to do to stop it. I haven't slept through the night in over 7 nights. I am getting tired of waking up in the middle of the night, stressed.

Sounds like you need to smoke a bowl before bedtime.

But in all seriousness, I'm sorry you're going through that. Anxiety is not fun, especially when it affects your sleep. Can you journal? Exercise? Those things help me cope with mental stress.

[wampuscat]

My divorce hearing is supposed to be on Monday. Y'all wish me luck! The last hearing we were supposed to have was on a Monday. The Friday before, I got a call at like 5PM saying that stbxh had requested to continue it and the judge granted it. I imagine he'll try to do the same thing again and try to get it continued at the very last minute. My lawyer seems to think that the judge won't continue it again, so we'll see. I'm ready for this to be over!

[bl]

jojoandleo ugh anxiety is the worst on sleep. I have to take medication for it unfortunately, but journaling and exercise do help me as well. Is it work related or do you not know what's really causing it?

[Eureka1984]

Mar 26, 2015 9:00:08 GMT -5 jojoandleo said:

My anxiety is through the roof for some reason. I have been nauseous all week. I don't know why and I don't know what to do to stop it. I haven't slept through the night in over 7 nights. I am getting tired of waking up in the middle of the night, stressed.

I am so sorry that you are stressed As the other said I agree, journal if you can.

I find that when it's close to a full moon that I get equally stressed out. Is the weather changing? Those could also be causes.

[mcc]

I got my period today and I'm super crampy. Womp womp

[jojoandleo]

Mar 26, 2015 9:15:55 GMT -5 bl said:

jojoandleo ugh anxiety is the worst on sleep. I have to take medication for it unfortunately, but journaling and exercise do help me as well. Is it work related or do you not know what's really causing it?

I have absolutely no idea. I think it is part work, but there is nothing specific at work stressing me out. I have a generalized anxiety disorder, but it's just really bad this week.

[mommadukes]

ugh I have so much anxiety lately. Not sure if the coffee is helping either. I wanna jump out of my skin.

[bg]

Mar 26, 2015 9:46:04 GMT -5 TR said:

Mar 26, 2015 8:56:15 GMT -5 bg said:

It's Breakfast Club day! Excited to see it on the big screen tonight.

Wasn't that Tuesday? (March 24)

Here they're screening it today and I think next Tuesday. Did you see it?

[jojoandleo]

Mar 26, 2015 10:01:41 GMT -5 pandora said:

Mar 26, 2015 9:42:23 GMT -5 jojoandleo said:

I have absolutely no idea. I think it is part work, but there is nothing specific at work stressing me out. I have a generalized anxiety disorder, but it's just really bad this week.

If you've tried the journaling, exercise, getting away for a bit with the hubs, massage, etc... and still nothing then can you talk to your doc since it's impacting your sleep (and I'm assuming, therefore your work performance and general daily activities, decision making)? 

There are some meds that you can take to help you sleep and it has longer anti-anxiety effects that last for the next ~ 24 hours. Some sleep and relief for a bit may make the world of difference. I'm normally not one to take meds but I have on occasion with my doc's prodding and it has helped. That, along with exercise, journaling, maybe getting away with your hubs for the weekend or just a mani/pedi may make the world of difference.

I stay away from Benadry/Tylenol PM for sleep aid as it makes me dumb and stupid/foggy for the first part of the next day - not good when at work!!

Yeah, I am a big fan of meds for people when they need them, but am resistant to taking them myself.  Which is so weird.  I have been exercising.  I am not much of a journal-er.  I could try?  But I don't even really know what I am feeling or why?  Ugh.  I feel like I need a Summer Vacation from adulthood to just unwind and have no responsibilities.  LOL.

I don't want to take anything like Lunesta because my mom does and they make her CRAZY.  She only sends us her crazy text messages when she is on her sleeping meds.  I am betting some type of anti-anxiety would help, at least a little bit.  I just get nervous meds will change who I am. 

Thanks everyone for the posts.  I know this will pass.  I just need to get over the hump, but I don't know what that hump is right now. 

[bg]

Mar 26, 2015 10:10:40 GMT -5 TR said:

Mar 26, 2015 10:07:56 GMT -5 bg said:

Here they're screening it today and I think next Tuesday. Did you see it?

I mean, I've seen The Breakfast Club. Maybe I don't know what you're talking about, lol. It took place on March 24th so I could see somewhere showing it that day as a special thing.

Ohhhhh.... It's the 30th anniversary of the movie so they're showing it in theaters. :-) I didn't realize it took place on 3/24. Makes sense they're showing it this week then.

[lookingup]

I went out drinking last night with a date (that went really well!) and I was home in bed around midnight. We were having a really good time, so I drank more than I normally would because YAAAAAAY day off today! But I was up at 9am cleaning my house. Am I getting old?

Also, I'm glad I was up early since I got a call from HR around 10. It was nothing super crazy- a girl who was on my schedule tonight got let go (for what I have no clue), and HR lady was calling to give me a heads up so I could get it covered. It would have really sucked to wake up to that phone call.

[lyssbobiss, Command, B613]

Hello, I am swamped in work. Send help.

[bl]

Mar 26, 2015 10:17:07 GMT -5 jojoandleo said:

Mar 26, 2015 10:01:41 GMT -5 pandora said:

If you've tried the journaling, exercise, getting away for a bit with the hubs, massage, etc... and still nothing then can you talk to your doc since it's impacting your sleep (and I'm assuming, therefore your work performance and general daily activities, decision making)? 

There are some meds that you can take to help you sleep and it has longer anti-anxiety effects that last for the next ~ 24 hours. Some sleep and relief for a bit may make the world of difference. I'm normally not one to take meds but I have on occasion with my doc's prodding and it has helped. That, along with exercise, journaling, maybe getting away with your hubs for the weekend or just a mani/pedi may make the world of difference.

I stay away from Benadry/Tylenol PM for sleep aid as it makes me dumb and stupid/foggy for the first part of the next day - not good when at work!!

Yeah, I am a big fan of meds for people when they need them, but am resistant to taking them myself.  Which is so weird.  I have been exercising.  I am not much of a journal-er.  I could try?  But I don't even really know what I am feeling or why?  Ugh.  I feel like I need a Summer Vacation from adulthood to just unwind and have no responsibilities.  LOL.

I don't want to take anything like Lunesta because my mom does and they make her CRAZY.  She only sends us her crazy text messages when she is on her sleeping meds.  I am betting some type of anti-anxiety would help, at least a little bit.  I just get nervous meds will change who I am. 

Thanks everyone for the posts.  I know this will pass.  I just need to get over the hump, but I don't know what that hump is right now. 

I take clonazepam to help with sleeping.  I take it around 8-9pm each night and by 10pm or so my mind is much more quiet, and I can sleep.  I can still feel regular emotions, drive, make sound decisions, but it helps to quiet my mind a bit.  I also CANNOT sleep in silence because my mind just wonders/stresses like crazy I need some kind of background noise.  Not saying medicine is the right option for you, but there are some out there that don't make you crazy, feel drunk, or change who you are if that makes sense. 

[Deleted]

jojoandleo big hugs! I totally get the hesitancy over drugs. For me I found they did change me, but for the better. For me I couldn't figure out what was causing anxiety because there wasn't anything "thing" I just was. Which was frustrating. I hope things balance out soon. I started doing some stretching and calming yoga and night and found that helpful.

[jojoandleo]

bl-I sleep with Netflix playing and earbuds in because I cannot sleep when it's quiet either. LOL.

@pdx18-Yeah, the fact that there is no "thing" I can point to with my anxiety is causing me even more anxiety. Like, what am I forgetting? I just need sometime to, like, recharge.

[idahome]

Today is the first day of my spring break. Hallelujah. Have major plans for spring cleaning, need to spend serious time applying for new jobs, and just relaxing. Hoping to get an appointment with a sports med doctor about my knee because it keeps getting worse.

Boo weather, but yay for no work.

[Deleted]

I have the worst breakout on the side of my nose. WTF. I haven't had acne since high school... and even then it was never this painful/lingering. I put some cream on it, but I'm pretty sure that just dried things out and burned my skin. Lovely. :\ I'm in my 30s. This shouldn't be happening to me.

I'm having company this weekend and it's already stressing me out. I need to clean house, grocery shop, etc. Blerg.

[shauniemae]

I am in the same "no sleep, don't know where my anxiety is coming from" camp as a couple of you guys as well. It's frustrating. I've always had trouble sleeping at night. In years past it was because I couldn't fall asleep, but did mostly stay asleep. In the last year+ it's been still trouble falling asleep but also not staying asleep through the night. I never really get great sleep, but sometimes it's a little better. Since Friday, though, it's been horrible...over the weekend, I only got 2 hours of sleep. Couldn't even nap. I can't take it! I have tried some meds, but am also hesitant to take anything. Even when I do, they've not helped much. I'll get a 1.5-2 hours of sleep at first and then be up every hour the rest of the night. I feel your pain!! I know that doesn't help though.

I've also had a somewhat crappy day. Is anyone familiar with Bartholin's cysts? I've had some bad swelling, pain, and irritation on one side of my labia (TMI) since Monday and finally saw the doc today. They diagnosed it as a Bartholin's cyst, but it's much deeper into the tissue and larger than this doctor has seen. I have to take some antibiotics, though it's not infected, and then come Monday possibly have it drained if it hasn't gotten smaller. I am worried. And I also have yet another vaginal infection. I beat myself up about this kind of thing because of my history and it just tears me up..........I've never really told anyone but a couple close friends of a choice I made almost 4 years ago. It's hard to deal with...but since then all the problems I've had with feminine issues I blame myself for harshly.

Debbie downer. Sorry!

[Deleted]

Sorry about the old LL being an ass, mp.
I'm going to look at another condo tonight and I have a good feeling about this one. Although I have not seen any photos my RE agent thinks I will like it. It is about a 5 minute drive from the area I was looking in, but still zoned for same schools etc. Fingers crossed.

[Wanderista]

I've spent all day in a meeting but at least it is over now and things went well. Some things had seemed a bit touch and go but now everything is falling into place nicely. I'm hoping that these positive developments carry forward.

I'm a bit tired because I've been busy and I will continue to be that way in the near future. I am finding ways to relax a bit though. I'll be going to the salon late tomorrow afternoon.

[Deleted]

The more I look at my finances, the more I realize affording a mortgage downpayment is ... just so far down the road. What kills me is that if I bought my condo (or similar in my complex), my mortgage payment (even after fees/interest/HOA) would be 50% my rent payment. Double Ugh.