I am a nervous wreck who is faking her way through the days.
I agree with spindle92. Sometimes you just have to fake it just to keep it together. There is nothing wrong with that. Hugs, mags. I hope you get some good news soon and that things calm the FUCK DOWN!
I am sitting in the waiting room at the car dealer and I am totally side eyeing this lady who is having a very loud conversation on her phone about how she owes over $10K in cc debt, the debt collectors are calling her but she is going to sue them for harassment because she has told them several times she does not have the money.
Post by dixienormous on Mar 27, 2015 11:10:49 GMT -5
I've got absolutely no sex drive these days. H wants sex even more than usual. I've been able to get into it once we've started for the most part though there have been times where I totally faked it all and was mentally making notes and plans for the next day.
I've got absolutely no sex drive these days. H wants sex even more than usual. I've been able to get into it once we've started for the most part though there have been times where I totally faked it all and was mentally making notes and plans for the next day.
Bully, if you feel a side-eye, I think people are just concerned Given P's freak-out and him keeping his house but you selling yours. I think you're moving forward with a clear head, though, and you know what's going on more than we do. We just want you to be happy!
I always think of a confession when I'm off the boards, and then forget about it by the time these threads come up! I will have to think of another one.
(((mags))) There are better days ahead for you, my friend! In the meantime, I hope that this upcoming vacation will help you guys decompress! You deserve it.
Bully, I wouldn't say I am side-eyeing you, but I am a bit confused. You've made vague mention of some TIP you guys were going through recently (unless I'm thinking of somebody else?) So I sort of wondered what the rush was to move in together if you are still working on things. But if you're happy, I'm happy for you. It's an exciting step!
Tell us more about the pre prenup. Is it an actual legal document or more of a written agreement of how you will handle things in the case of a breakup?
Post by bullygirl979 on Mar 27, 2015 11:29:36 GMT -5
gault and Muddled, I get it. But I think it is important to remember that no one here really knows P. I'm not trying to throw out a "you don't know my lyfe" but I'm presenting very one sided information. P got burned very badly by his ex and he doesn't want that to happen again. Did he freak out? Yes. But at the end of the day, he recognized that it was an emotional response triggered by his past. He and we were able to talk about it and come to a resolution that we feel is right for us. We both want to move forward.
As for the selling my house.....well. I love my house. But...at the same token, my neighborhood is hot right now and financially, it is a really good move for me to sell. I am going to make a nice profit. Even if something happens with us right now, I'm okay not owning that house. I'm ready for a bigger kitchen, more private outdoor space, etc. I would be okay with starting over.
Not a confession, but an update - my therapist is also a nurse and we put together a food plan for me yesterday. I'm not going to weigh myself at home because I fixate on the number and how much time has gone by since I was that weight/size and how much I fucked up etc etc... so she is weighing me at her office and just telling me the pounds lost, not my actual weight. It will take pressure off me and will lessen my anxiety.
We also got a calorie count, doing south beach-esque stuff to detox from sugar and the carbs that make me bloat or feel in a mental haze. The worst part - giving up beer for awhile.
I'm also thinking of starting a private blog to get thoughts out, and it helped the first time I lost 130 pounds. I've gained most of it back, it is shocking to me and so demoralizing. So, time to take control back.
I'm also not going to date again for awhile so I can focus on this.
Post by bullygirl979 on Mar 27, 2015 11:33:31 GMT -5
margarita, the TIP is because when the moving in starting to get more concrete, P freaked out a bit (see my above post). He was giving me some mixed messages that I didn't know how to take. We talked through it and he was able to identify that it was an emotional response triggered by his very messy divorce. Once we talked and worked through some of the concerns, he was fine with moving forward.
Muddled, my sister is lawyer, so I plan on making this as official as I can make it. Truthfully, we both got so screwed over in our divorces that we would both feel better knowing it is firmly worked out ahead of time.
I don't know much about it so can't contribute to all of it. I think from what you've said you've got a plan and it seems like a good one. You've got no stones thrown from me. I moved in with my now DH 9 months into our relationship 12 years ago. You do what you want.
My confession is that I feel like I'm getting the silent side-eye for moving forward with moving in with P.
[brNot side-eye, but definitely concern
You mentioned TIP, but weren't specific (on the boards). Then you're moving ahead with moving in together.
I know I don't know all the facts, so I'm generally keeping silent on the topic and hoping the issue was resolved and it all works out.
Yeap this is where I am at too.
I feel like I missed a bunch of info though.
I just remember you mentioning that there were issues and then it was like all was good.
But I also 1000000% admit I am a slow mover on things. If I was in your shoes, a conversation or two would not be enough for me to move forward. I also need time. I AM NOT JUDGING YOU - I am simply saying I am a slow mover and that is how I work.
Fuck it took me 11 years to get married, clearly I move slow.
You mentioned TIP, but weren't specific (on the boards). Then you're moving ahead with moving in together.
I know I don't know all the facts, so I'm generally keeping silent on the topic and hoping the issue was resolved and it all works out.
Yeap this is where I am at too.
I feel like I missed a bunch of info though.
I just remember you mentioning that there were issues and then it was like all was good.
But I also 1000000% admit I am a slow mover on things. If I was in your shoes, a conversation or two would not be enough for me to move forward. I also need time. I AM NOT JUDGING YOU - I am simply saying I am a slow mover and that is how I work.
Fuck it took me 11 years to get married, clearly I move slow.
Ultimately I just want you to be happy.
No, I get what you are saying. I guess part of it was the issue and part of it was our conversations. If he was like "I'm not sure I want to move forward with you" or "I'm not sure I still love you" then I would absolutely be putting the brakes on. But given it wasn't that, we were able to talk it through and identify where it was coming from.