ETA: I'm going to change this up - no more wallowing. Positive Positive Positive!
I am doing everything I can to avoid people today. My finger is so obviously injured, and it's still swollen so I really can't bandage it because the swelling still needs to go down. I don't know how to express how sad I feel about it It's like how I feel when I'm on a roller coaster - I want to scream, but I just end up laughing.
I'm avoiding my H because he's as upset about it as I am. He wants to make sure I know the rings will never be the same again...well, fucker, neither will my finger! I'm already upset with myself, and I do not need additional guilt on top of it so I have secluded myself upstairs where I fixed myself a massive tex-mex salad for lunch and am reading through my assignments for this quarter.
I think I'll respond to a couple of class discussion posts and then curl up under a blanket and watch a movie.
Why is your H bringing up the rings SwimDeep? That's kind of crappy.
I am sorry you're having a hard day.
he worked really hard to save up and buy them, so the symbolism of having them cut off my finger was painful to him. He kept bringing up how having them cut off seemed like a metaphor for our relationship.
Logically, we both know they can be repaired, but emotionally...he's being an asshole about it. And I'm being a jerk now too because I've started bringing things up from the past to throw at him.
At least we have learned enough from therapy to know to give each other space right now.
SwimDeep what actually happened that your rings got stuck and why are you being so hard on yourself?
It's such a mundane story... I hadn't worn them in a while, and I just decided on a whim to put them on, even though I had to push a bit to get them on. Later in the day, when I tried to take them off, my whole finger was swollen. I should have waited a while and maybe iced my hand before trying to take them off, but instead I tried to force them off with a little soap. When that didn't work, I tried the rubber band trick. And when that didn't work, I tried the floss trick. And when that didn't work my finger was too swollen and painful to try anything else. When we got to the ER, the person who checked me in told me he thought I'd cut my finger off because it was such a dark purple/blue at the tip.
I don't like that your husband is being an asshole about it, even though I understand that emotions happen regardless of logic. I also don't like you beating yourself up about it. Accidents happen and there was nothing wrong with you trying to wear your rings again.
I don't like that your husband is being an asshole about it, even though I understand that emotions happen regardless of logic. I also don't like you beating yourself up about it. Accidents happen and there was nothing wrong with you trying to wear your rings again.
I don't like that your husband is being an asshole about it, even though I understand that emotions happen regardless of logic. I also don't like you beating yourself up about it. Accidents happen and there was nothing wrong with you trying to wear your rings again.
He tells me all the time that he doesn't like looking like the asshole...so I tell him to stop being an asshole! And then we get into he said/she said arguments that don't get anybody anywhere.
SwimDeep I am sorry but your husband is being a huge asshole.
A ring is a material object, it can be replaced or repaired. Your finger.....umm not so much.
YES HE IS!
(as a side note, I might have gotten into my vodka stash...just sayin')
He's even said that they're just rings, just material objects...but then he went on about how hard he worked to save up for them and how painful it was for him to watch the guy cut them off my finger...and why did I try to force the rings off my finger without consulting him and blah blah blah...
A true random - I just had the BEST conversation with my little sister! She's moved in with her BF and seems to be withstanding the guilt trips from grandparental/parental unit fairly well. She also decided not to take her pup, which (honestly) is in the best interest of the dog. And she still goes to my parents house to play/walk with him.
Now I need to get in touch with one of my other little sisters...who is over 21 and still hasn't learned how to drive... *target acquired*
Post by cuddlyevil on Apr 12, 2015 14:49:58 GMT -5
I am glad he said something. But he still strikes me as a jackass. Maybe because it reminds me of stbx and how he would make something that happened to me all about him.
I love cappuccinos and that kind of latte and cappuccino art! Thank you!
SwimDeep I've said before that he sounds similar to your parents in terms of the way he treats you. It makes me sad for you, you deserve someone whose only concern is that YOU are okay, not who guilts you got not doing things his way. That's the underlying theme I see that concerns me.
I just want you all to know that I am mean. So says my three year old. I wouldn't let him have a popsicle.
I will join you on this bench. I'm a big meanie too. In a fit of rage one day ds told me he didn't want me to be his mom anymore. I mustered up all the self control I had and told him that we'd talk about it in the morning and if he still felt the same way we'd go find him a new mom.
I just want you all to know that I am mean. So says my three year old. I wouldn't let him have a popsicle.
we already knew this ::wink::
Just got home. I feel so shitty right now. Laying in bed with the lights off, watching a little tv. The kid came upstairs to give me a hug, then when downstairs 'to find daddy' and hasn't returned. I'm not complaining, lol.
I just want you all to know that I am mean. So says my three year old. I wouldn't let him have a popsicle.
I will join you on this bench. I'm a big meanie too. In a fit of rage one day ds told me he didn't want me to be his mom anymore. I mustered up all the self control I had and told him that we'd talk about it in the morning and if he still felt the same way we'd go find him a new mom.
I will join you on this bench. I'm a big meanie too. In a fit of rage one day ds told me he didn't want me to be his mom anymore. I mustered up all the self control I had and told him that we'd talk about it in the morning and if he still felt the same way we'd go find him a new mom.
awwww. (sad face)
He was appropriately apologetic by the time he went to bed. Lol
Post by partiallysunny on Apr 12, 2015 21:30:04 GMT -5
I've just watched a few episodes of Doctor Who. I'm intrigued and confused. And annoyed that there seems to be a marathon on but I should really go to bed because I try to be a gainfully employed adult.