The VALIDITY OF THE CLAIM? She had a baby. She's entitled to the leave. Wtf wtf wtf.
It's legit called a "bonding claim"
No where in this document does it state that the parent must be with the child, while it does reference that for medical care the family member must be under the care of a Doctor. THEY DON"T FREAKING CARE. Bonding claim is to keep businesses from exempting adoptive parents.
It's phrased that way to allow participation for adoptive parents. We can, I guess, dispense with the charade that you're not judging. Seriously, I can't wtf you hard enough for this.
There is nothing on the site that requires you to prove you are spending 24/7 with the baby. They want proof of birth, parenthood, adoption, etc.
Bonding is happening even if you're not with the baby 24/7.
God, yes. I had a really hard time bonding with DS1, and looking back I'm actually convinced that some time away would have significantly helped.
I don't know if I would have chosen to be gone 10 days OOC after DS1, but after DS2 was born I would have been much breezier about it. These kids are going to be sucking the life out of me 24-7 for the rest of my life, lol. Taking 10 days to focus on DH and I sounds awesome, and if that's the most convenient time to make it happen then so be it.
Here in NJ there IS something called family leave INSURANCE.
You qualify if
A) you have a newly adopted child or newborn that you would like to bond with (their wording- not mine)
Or
B) to care for a severely ill family member
It is six weeks of paid time off
I'm not judging her for going on vacation without her kids, I'm questioning the validity of the claim.
To qualify for the first form of leave insurance you have to submit a lengthy application proving the time will be used to "bond" with the baby.
The conversation at work started because someone said "can't wait to see pics on Facebook", and coworker was all "nah, gotta keep this trip on the dl, because I'm using family leave time".
You are making yourself our to sound like an asshole in this situation. If you're jealous it, just admit it. There is no reason for you to be judging this at.all.
Post by snipsnsnails on Apr 19, 2015 15:14:53 GMT -5
Aw, man, honey, I hope you posted this b/c *you* are going on a 10-day tropical getaway after you have your next kiddo. In which case, I'd say go on with your bad self.
If not, well, I don't know about how people have that saying about you're your own worst enemy; women are women's worst enemy sometimes. : /
Here in NJ there IS something called family leave INSURANCE.
You qualify if
A) you have a newly adopted child or newborn that you would like to bond with (their wording- not mine)
Or
B) to care for a severely ill family member
It is six weeks of paid time off
I'm not judging her for going on vacation without her kids, I'm questioning the validity of the claim.
To qualify for the first form of leave insurance you have to submit a lengthy application proving the time will be used to "bond" with the baby.
The conversation at work started because someone said "can't wait to see pics on Facebook", and coworker was all "nah, gotta keep this trip on the dl, because I'm using family leave time".
You are making yourself our to sound like an asshole in this situation. If you're jealous it, just admit it. There is no reason for you to be judging this at.all.
Uh, what? Lol
I think it's great that she's on vacation.
Just not sure about getting paid through this type of insurance.
I guess if it's completely on the up and up, maybe it's something I would consider doing (you can take the time intermittently over the first 12 months). I'm just not totally convinced this is legit. I would feel a little uneasy about it, like I was doing something shady.
You are making yourself our to sound like an asshole in this situation. If you're jealous it, just admit it. There is no reason for you to be judging this at.all.
Uh, what? Lol
I think it's great that she's on vacation.
Just not sure about getting paid through this type of insurance.
I guess if it's completely on the up and up, maybe it's something I would consider doing (you can take the time intermittently over the first 12 months). I'm just not totally convinced this is legit. I would feel a little uneasy about it, like I was doing something shady.
I see I'm in the minority.
Who do you think this should be reported to since it's obvious you think she is in the wrong.
I thought it would make for some interesting conversation.
No, you're mad and jealous of someone else. You brought it here, with a "this damn rule breaker" and now you cant fucking make up your mind as to your position. You cant 'not care' while simultaneously vigorously defending your erroneous position.
Just not sure about getting paid through this type of insurance.
I guess if it's completely on the up and up, maybe it's something I would consider doing (you can take the time intermittently over the first 12 months). I'm just not totally convinced this is legit. I would feel a little uneasy about it, like I was doing something shady.
I see I'm insane and also have no idea of what im speaking of.
OP has never once indicated that she has any desire to tattle on her coworker. I'm not sure why so many replies are telling her to go ahead and do it. Her thread title was WDMLT, not WWMLD.
Anyway, I think what's interesting is that the coworker asked to keep the trip on the DL, which suggests she herself thinks she's doing something she shouldn't be, which got OP thinking about it. OP, is that not accurate?
OP has never once indicated that she has any desire to tattle on her coworker. I'm not sure why so many replies are telling her to go ahead and do it. Her thread title was WDMLT, not WWMLD.
Anyway, I think what's interesting is that the coworker asked to keep the trip on the DL, which suggests she herself thinks she's doing something she shouldn't be, which got OP thinking about it. OP, is that not accurate?
Or she was just concerned that people would judge her for it.
OP has never once indicated that she has any desire to tattle on her coworker. I'm not sure why so many replies are telling her to go ahead and do it. Her thread title was WDMLT, not WWMLD.
Anyway, I think what's interesting is that the coworker asked to keep the trip on the DL, which suggests she herself thinks she's doing something she shouldn't be, which got OP thinking about it. OP, is that not accurate?
OP has never once indicated that she has any desire to tattle on her coworker. I'm not sure why so many replies are telling her to go ahead and do it. Her thread title was WDMLT, not WWMLD.
Anyway, I think what's interesting is that the coworker asked to keep the trip on the DL, which suggests she herself thinks she's doing something she shouldn't be, which got OP thinking about it. OP, is that not accurate?
Or she was just concerned that people would judge her for it.
Which was pretty accurate, apparently.
Judge her for what? Making the claim or vacationing without her kids?
She frequently does that latter. She's not the type that would care if anyone judged her for either.
I think it's great that she vacations without her kids. I think most people agree that parents need that kind of time away.
Or she was just concerned that people would judge her for it.
Which was pretty accurate, apparently.
Judge her for what? Making the claim or vacationing without her kids?
She frequently does that latter. She's not the type that would care if anyone judged her for either.
I think it's great that she vacations without her kids. I think most people agree that parents need that kind of time away.
Both. Making the claim and then vacationing without her kids while on it.
Unless FMLA or whatever she is using states she has to be in possession of her children at all times, then who cares how she uses it? The claim was approved and I'm assuming there were no stipulations about how she used it, so, what does it matter if she went on vacation while on leave? She's entitled to it, she used it.
I can't believe I read all of this. Aside from my burning jealousy, if I cared any less about this lady being in the Caribbean while on mat leave, I'd be dead.
And for real lol at the shock and horror over the idea of leaving a younger-than-six-week-old for ten whole days. They don't even know they have hands at that point! It will all be okay.
Judge her for what? Making the claim or vacationing without her kids?
She frequently does that latter. She's not the type that would care if anyone judged her for either.
I think it's great that she vacations without her kids. I think most people agree that parents need that kind of time away.
Both. Making the claim and then vacationing without her kids while on it.
Unless FMLA or whatever she is using states she has to be in possession of her children at all times, then who cares how she uses it? The claim was approved and I'm assuming there were no stipulations about how she used it, so, what does it matter if she went on vacation while on leave? She's entitled to it, she used it.
OP is making a big fuss about the terminology, but this really is disability insurance designed for people who are caring for family members or children. It's worded really broadly (using bonding) so that adoptive parents or fathers can also take advantage.
If you read the fine print, they basically don't want to double pay you. So they don't want you having additional disability that overlaps, taking vacation or sick leave at the same time, or getting paid for working while you're also getting disability.
Otherwise they don't care where you're taking your leave, just so long as you're not getting paid in more than one way that overlaps another.
Both. Making the claim and then vacationing without her kids while on it.
Unless FMLA or whatever she is using states she has to be in possession of her children at all times, then who cares how she uses it? The claim was approved and I'm assuming there were no stipulations about how she used it, so, what does it matter if she went on vacation while on leave? She's entitled to it, she used it.
OP is making a big fuss about the terminology, but this really is disability insurance designed for people who are caring for family members or children. It's worded really broadly (using bonding) so that adoptive parents or fathers can also take advantage.
If you read the fine print, they basically don't want to double pay you. So they don't want you having additional disability that overlaps, taking vacation or sick leave at the same time, or getting paid for working while you're also getting disability.
Otherwise they don't care where you're taking your leave, just so long as you're not getting paid in more than one way that overlaps another.
I'm sorry this post didn't go the way you wanted it to.
I thought it would make for some interesting conversation.
I don't believe you. I started a thread once wanting everyone to agree with me that Gap's spring kids line looked like Derelicte and very few agreed with me. The post had the same tonal shift I'd not anticipated, except I never pretended otherwise.
I am still confused about what op thinks her coworker is using. Std is 6 weeks with 66 2/3 of your salary paid. FMLA is 12 weeks unpaid, can be used over a 12 mos period, or all at once. Unless this is a company maternity policy.
Getting your mandatory reporter checklist ready? :-P