Quick Mom Vent

[Deleted]

My mom texted me today asking how everything was going. I responded back that it's been a little rough, we've had daycare issues, H hasn't had any luck on the job front, we've got UE filing issues and now O has decided she's not into sleeping at night. I said I just felt really tired but it'll pass soon, and that I needed to plan something for O's birthday but that it will be a fun distraction. It ended with "It's ok, one day I'll be fully rested. I think, lol."

My mom responds back, "I'm still waiting for it." That's it. No acknowledgement of anything else.

She's a stay at home wife. Her daily routine is basically shopping and picking up obscure meditation techniques and doing reiki and figuring out where she wants to travel to next. They don't have to worry about anything. She's set. It's literally the most rested existence one could lead. 

I didn't respond to her reply, mainly bc I don't know really where to go with that and didn't want it to turn into some martyr competition. I'm in a good head space (I think, lol) and haven't really been super stressed, but the compilation of things just gets tiring and never ending it seems. I feel like I've really had to be "on" the past couple weeks, and that's ok. Shit ebbs and flows. I think I'm being super sensitive about this, but just for ONCE can't she say "that sounds rough" or "I'm sorry" or "it will get better soon"? 

[luckyval]

Not what you needed at all.

Chin up, and I'd minimize contact with her in the short term if that's what it produces.

[jeekerbeeker]

I totally get this and I understand how frustrating it can be.

My mom also lives a pretty charmed life and sometimes I think that she forgets how it is in the "real" world.  Sorry Betty

[cville]

No, you aren't being sensitive. She's being rude.

[elleblue]

Ugh, I'm sorry. I think parents have a very selective memory and often forget how difficult things were back when they were young. *hugs*

[Deleted]

I had gotten SO GOOD at dealing with her, you guys. I feel like I set myself up for hurt feelings by giving an actual response instead of just "Fine!"

I mean, I was surprised she even asked. At least on the scale of icky things it's a pretty minor one for me to just refocus on what our dynamic truly is and remind myself of the expectations. So that's a positive.

[achi]

Wow, that was super helpful of her.


Not.

[cville]

Also, dude, I'm so sorry that you're tired with a tired kid and all of that other shit. That's a lot. A LOT a lot.

[noodleskooze]

That was rude of her.

I hope things look up for you guys soon and that you get a break (and sleep)!

[margarita]

That's not what you need right now. I'm sorry.

[noodleskooze]

ALSO if you are already on top of planning O's party (or even have it on your radar at all), you're doing pretty well! Better than I am!

[mrsukyankee]

That was not a kind response. That sucks.

[Deleted]

Nothing can be good when your kid decides to stop sleeping. I mean, the rest does suck, but at least you could feel rested and ready to face it.

(((HUGS)))



and just so I know how far behind I am, when is your kid's birthday?

[aliciaflorrick]

That sucks and I get it. My mother manages to make everything about her or how much worse she has/had it.

I hope that in the very near future things head in the direction you would like.

[pantsparty]

Ugh, I'm sorry.

[pagas]

I am sorry, that completely sucks.

[Deleted]

Lol. Christ. I swear on everything daycare just called to let me know O has a 102 fever.

Le sigh.

[game blouses]

Apr 21, 2015 15:54:14 GMT -5 @smace said:

Every time i say anything about sleep issues, she says that she had it worse bc i didnt sleep.

Omg. It's been 36 years. let it go! Your most difficult daily task is deciding whether to get your hair done or a massage.

Ugh, my mom does this too. Me as a baby was so much worse than my kids could ever be. "Oh, DS threw up on you today? Doesn't that make you want to say you're sorry for throwing up on me when when you were a baby?"

[malibu]

I'm sorry. You've had such a rough time lately. Your mom was completely rude with that response.

I promise it does and will get better.

[8675309]

My mother has no job, no financial issues or any real life stresses. BUT ANYTIME I COMPLAIN about how busy, stressed or tired I am, she spends the next 10 minutes of our conversation talking about all the things she has to do.

So Betty, I feel ya. BIG TIME.

I think I am bitchier than you because I call her out on it. "Oh really mom? Must be super hard being retired. Please tell me more about that so I can look forward TO YOUR LIFE down the road."

[Deleted]

Apr 21, 2015 16:16:38 GMT -5 8675309 said:

My mother has no job, no financial issues or any real life stresses. BUT ANYTIME I COMPLAIN about how busy, stressed or tired I am, she spends the next 10 minutes of our conversation talking about all the things she has to do.

So Betty, I feel ya. BIG TIME.

I think I am bitchier than you because I call her out on it. "Oh really mom? Must be super hard being retired. Please tell me more about that so I can look forward TO YOUR LIFE down the road."

My mom does the same exact thing. I'm so sorry Betty, I hope things get better for you guys quickly. 

[nomad100]

((hugs))

Another person with a mom that doesn't get it signing in. Mine complains all the time how she is so "busy" and "stressed." Her stress comes from traveling and her busyness comes from vounteering less than 10 hours a month. Last time she said something about being so stressed and busy, I looked at her and asked her flat out "with what? You are retired. You have all the time and money you could ask for. Your big stress is packing for your next amazing vacation. How are you so damn busy and stressed?" She gave me a I sucked on a lemon face and didn't talk to me for a week.

[Deleted]

Thanks you guys! I know I'm exhausted bc I got teary reading some of these responses.

[noodleskooze]

Seriously let me know if you need to get out this week/weekend!