I mean......God. C'mon! *sigh* I wish I hadn't opened this thread. I know better.
This one killed me. 2 weeks post partum, baby is crying... That right there should be a clue to give the baby up.
Also, they refer to his uncle Jessie who is 2 years older than her baby. I would think having a newborn in the house would make an impression on a 12-13 year old and make them think about where babies come from. Guess not.
eTA: I don't blame her for not knowing better, given what she grew up with, but jeez. I guess I would have thought her mom, who was likely s teenage mother, would have suggested that it sucks to be a teenage mother and maybe she should give it up. Does that ever happen, or does the gma advocate for keeping the grand baby, or what?
I would bet money the girls making out picture was staged in some way. They're 14, they're anxious to prove that they're bi and hot, they're having their pictures taken. Plus, it's obvious that this photographer is going for the most sensationalist shots s/he can get.
Really, this whole photoshoot is nothing more than poverty tourism. The more I think about it, the more angry I get.
Post by UMaineTeach on Aug 13, 2012 19:30:13 GMT -5
I know these children and these families. There is no easy fix, but I try everyday to do the best job I can.
I just read this book this summer - it's an old one and some of the education things wouldn't happen today, but the child the book is about 100% still exists.
I would bet money the girls making out picture was staged in some way. They're 14, they're anxious to prove that they're bi and hot, they're having their pictures taken. Plus, it's obvious that this photographer is going for the most sensationalist shots s/he can get.
Really, this whole photoshoot is nothing more than poverty tourism. The more I think about it, the more angry I get.
I do want to know how much of these pictures were stages and/or encouraged somehow. I have no doubt this child's life is just this sad and depressing. But I want to know whose grand idea it was to sit around in your bra and panties and play Guitar Hero. Something tells me it wasn't grandma's.
Also, what is wrong with this school district? So many out of school suspensions? Ugh
Now, it's laziness.
It used to be that a kid getting suspended would also get them in trouble at home. Now they want to get kicked out because it's days off. The parents don't care. It's not just this district, for sure.
My mom is an aide at the high school I went to. It was ok when I was there, mediocre when my brother was there 10 years later. Now it's just bad. My mom works for the vice principal and handles all the discipline cases. I'll be on the phone with her and a kid will walk in. She knows them without asking their name and says "OK, go to inschool." I ask her why they don't work with those kids and she says it's basically beyond her mental bandwidth. That is the school policy. Most of the kids get sent to inschool so they can sleep.
My mom is very loving and sees the best in all the kids and there are some every year who get in trouble just so they can go sit in her office and get some positive attention every once in a while. 30 years at this school and she makes around $40k and has to deal with the worst of the worst in an office with no windows. I can't wait til she retires...
That is a big problem and I am really surprised the USDE hasn't come down on your mom's district, or this one for that matter. BCPSS got into a big trouble issue with this and they are working on it as they are now in the eye of the media and the feds.
Post by heightsyankee on Aug 13, 2012 20:21:33 GMT -5
I think Baltimore is just more on the radar. I am from a working class (if they're lucky) town of 15k. Troy is too poor and has too many cumulative problems to change what is pretty much standard practice and has been for decades. It sucks. I don't think it's right and it has been a peeve of mine for as long as I can remember- back to when I was in HS myself 20 years ago. I just don't think it's high on the list of things to change for these kinds on districts. Sadly, I think they identify a few troubled kids and try to make in roads with them but the ones who seem hopeless just get left behind.
Post by UMaineTeach on Aug 13, 2012 20:22:53 GMT -5
I don't know about that area of NY, but I can speak of my area.
We had some students who were way too violent for school to be an appropriate educational environment, even with 1:1 or sometimes 2:1 (adult to student) supervision and isolation from the general population.
We were forced to suspend for everyone's safety and have a tech tutor at home a couple hours a day while we looked into more restrictive placements. It's not want anyone wanted, but the kids were beyond what is reasonable to expect people with little training making $10/hr to deal with.
The problem with seeking a more restrictive placement is that there has to be a long history of the student not succeeding in school despite multiple re-worked IEPs and you have to turn all the reports into the facility you are referring to, they have to review and decide if the kid is a good fit for the program. There are a limited number of programs to send kids to and they are selective. When the child is only in 1st grade there is not the long history - takes time to do the testing, interventions, behavior plans, gather data, convince the parents, test the meds, call behaviorists and in the meantime staff are getting injured, property is being damaged, the child isn't learning at school so the time comes to suspend.
And the high number of suspensions, unfortunately, can be favorable for a request seeking alt. placement.
It doesn't say why Donnie's day treatment program didn't work after he was accepted.
Post by heightsyankee on Aug 13, 2012 20:31:09 GMT -5
I obviously don't doubt what you're saying but with the kids my mom deals with, this isn't the case. These kids mess around in class or skip class, get caught and get sent to the "inschool room" for any number of class periods, up to the rest of the day. There is a monitor (human) and other kids in the class. They just sit there and sleep or pass notes. Certainly there are kids who get kicked out of school and yes, there are definitely violent ones. However, inschool is about as stupid as it gets- they're still in school but not learning anything. How does this help? The really sad part is that a lot of these kids do it on purpose. They don't do something bad enough to get kicked out of school but they want to go to inschool and stay there all day rather than be in class. Shouldn't that be a red flag for someone? And maybe it is but this school system has very few resources.
My niece and nephew were adopted through FC when they were 8 and 9, removed from the home at 5 and 6. Their birthparents are still married, and they look like the grandmother in these pictures - rode hard and soulless. It took a shit ton of work to fix my niece and nephew, but either they were removed early enough, or my SIL and BIL are great parents (or a mix of both), because they're awesome adults. Both almost done with college, my niece just got married and my nephew is thinking about going for a masters degree.
The cycle can be broken, but it takes an unholy amount of work.
Post by frangoldsmith on Aug 14, 2012 12:26:43 GMT -5
I grew up a lot like this. My mother wasn’t making out with women, but there was a steady parade of men in her life. She was 14 when I was born and refused to give me up. There was always money for drugs and booze, but at the end of the month I usually went to bed hungry. I had scoliosis and wore a brace. I had open, festering sores under my brace because she wouldn’t help me take it off and bathe. CPS, doctors, and the school system did nothing for me. There were so many signs of abuse and neglect: my clothes were often dirty because there was no money for laundry, I smelled because of the sores, I had bruises all over my body and face. Things got better when I was about 9 because I was able to take better care of myself and my mother’s friends would pay me to babysit. I also started stealing from my mom so I could buy food. I always did well in school because I was smart, but I usually didn’t do homework or projects because I had no help at home. I was labeled as manipulative and a problem and was put in a psych ward when I was 11. After 3 weeks, I was sent back home. When I was 13, my mother got married and her husband beat me enough so I was finally put in foster care. After 3 months, I was back home. This cycle continued until I was 15 when I was permanently placed in foster care. I am so glad that I had a stable home for my last 3 years of high school so I was able to get my grades up and get into college. I am still very bitter about my experience and how the system totally failed me.
I grew up a lot like this. My mother wasn’t making out with women, but there was a steady parade of men in her life. She was 14 when I was born and refused to give me up. There was always money for drugs and booze, but at the end of the month I usually went to bed hungry. I had scoliosis and wore a brace. I had open, festering sores under my brace because she wouldn’t help me take it off and bathe. CPS, doctors, and the school system did nothing for me. There were so many signs of abuse and neglect: my clothes were often dirty because there was no money for laundry, I smelled because of the sores, I had bruises all over my body and face. Things got better when I was about 9 because I was able to take better care of myself and my mother’s friends would pay me to babysit. I also started stealing from my mom so I could buy food. I always did well in school because I was smart, but I usually didn’t do homework or projects because I had no help at home. I was labeled as manipulative and a problem and was put in a psych ward when I was 11. After 3 weeks, I was sent back home. When I was 13, my mother got married and her husband beat me enough so I was finally put in foster care. After 3 months, I was back home. This cycle continued until I was 15 when I was permanently placed in foster care. I am so glad that I had a stable home for my last 3 years of high school so I was able to get my grades up and get into college. I am still very bitter about my experience and how the system totally failed me.
Fran- I am so sorry that you had tp grow up like that. I'm sorry that the system completely failed you. You are a star to have been able to get yourself to a better place. I wish you all the best and continued success.
And it makes sense that you're bitter. I want to smack the shit out of several people you mentioned and I only read the short version of your life.
I grew up a lot like this. My mother wasn�t making out with women, but there was a steady parade of men in her life. She was 14 when I was born and refused to give me up. There was always money for drugs and booze, but at the end of the month I usually went to bed hungry. I had scoliosis and wore a brace. I had open, festering sores under my brace because she wouldn�t help me take it off and bathe. CPS, doctors, and the school system did nothing for me. There were so many signs of abuse and neglect: my clothes were often dirty because there was no money for laundry, I smelled because of the sores, I had bruises all over my body and face. Things got better when I was about 9 because I was able to take better care of myself and my mother�s friends would pay me to babysit. I also started stealing from my mom so I could buy food. I always did well in school because I was smart, but I usually didn�t do homework or projects because I had no help at home. I was labeled as manipulative and a problem and was put in a psych ward when I was 11. After 3 weeks, I was sent back home. When I was 13, my mother got married and her husband beat me enough so I was finally put in foster care. After 3 months, I was back home. This cycle continued until I was 15 when I was permanently placed in foster care. I am so glad that I had a stable home for my last 3 years of high school so I was able to get my grades up and get into college. I am still very bitter about my experience and how the system totally failed me.