These are my Confessions

[jojoandleo]

Just when I thought I said all I could say, my chick on the side said she got one on the way.

Anyway, I always repost lost dog notices on FB.  I rarely post any other lost type posts. 

I sometimes wish H had one of those jobs where he was gone for a few days and home for a few days so I could have the house all to myself to watch what I want on TV without bitching about my reality TV shows and eat popcorn for dinner.  I love the man, I do, but I kinda envy people whose H's travel for work.  I'd probably hate it if he did and miss him.

[Eureka1984]

These are my confessions
Man I'm thrown and I dont know what to do
I guess I gotta give part 2 of my confessions..


I have been unhappy in my career for a long time. I sometimes think I'm fooling myself. I love kids but I don't know what has made me so bitter.

[bullygirl979]

The director of another department resigned and the department is a MESS. My boss wants me to go over there and clean it up. It would be more money, but man, it would be a lot of work. I'm waiting to see what happens and what (if anything) I would be offered. I hate being tempted by a good raise.

[jojoandleo]

Eureka1984-I'm liking for the lyrics, not the real confession. I'm unhappy in my current career path. It definitely makes me bitter, too.

[Wanderista]

I do have a kind of a flameful. I have a friend who other friends say is in a bad relationship. This is not the one who rushed into getting married, it's a different friend with questionable life choices. Anyway, some other friends who know this friend better than me say that this girl is in a bad, unhealthy relationship - like some kind of emotionally manipulative relationship. I haven't witnessed it myself but I don't see her that much. She fell out with these people because they told her that she should break up with the guy and she is now engaged. They were all really close before but now they don't speak and she unfriended them on FB.

The flameful part is that her fiance has a really awesome beach house. It's huge and it is right on the coast in a really nice beachy area. It has multiple balconies facing the ocean. Last year, I had a room with a private balcony like this. It is really nice and they invite friends out to stay with them for free, friends who don't criticize their relationship. I've been invited for up to a week this summer and I'll admit that I haven't thought twice about going. I totally will. He might be a terrible person but damn, that's an awesome beach house. I will go and have a great time.

[Eureka1984]

Thanks jojo it's hard admitting. I'm trying to figure out ways to change it.

[jigsy]

This is lame but...

Last week I bough ta maxi dress. Totally cute, but it was also $80. I do not need an $80 dress when I can buy something pretty similar from H&M for less than $20. But then last night I watched the John Oliver segment about cheap clothing. And the $80 maxi was made in the USA...so now I think I have been shamed into keeping it. I do want to make more responsible choices when it comes to that stuff.

Maybe this doesn't sound like that crazy of a confession...but if you saw my financials for this month, you would be telling me to return the dress and buy nothing! Moving is expensive! But I justify it because it is a one time expense deal...soooo...yeah.

Lame. I know.

[Deleted]

I am having hard feelings with BF right now. I knew this trip would be trying. I wish we could talk about these things now, but I am sure it will have to wait until he's home... next week.

[jojoandleo]

May 13, 2015 10:01:56 GMT -5 Wanderista said:

I do have a kind of a flameful. I have a friend who other friends say is in a bad relationship. This is not the one who rushed into getting married, it's a different friend with questionable life choices. Anyway, some other friends who know this friend better than me say that this girl is in a bad, unhealthy relationship - like some kind of emotionally manipulative relationship. I haven't witnessed it myself but I don't see her that much. She fell out with these people because they told her that she should break up with the guy and she is now engaged. They were all really close before but now they don't speak and she unfriended them on FB.

The flameful part is that her fiance has a really awesome beach house. It's huge and it is right on the coast in a really nice beachy area. It has multiple balconies facing the ocean. Last year, I had a room with a private balcony like this. It is really nice and they invite friends out to stay with them for free, friends who don't criticize their relationship. I've been invited for up to a week this summer and I'll admit that I haven't thought twice about going. I totally will. He might be a terrible person but damn, that's an awesome beach house. I will go and have a great time.

I would go, but I would also be looking for signs of abuse/manipulation when I went.  I don't like just believing what other's say about a relationship, I like to see it for myself.  (Or, as in here, read the OP's posts about it myself )  BUUUT, if I saw signs of manipulation/abuse, there is no way in hell I would keep my mouth shut for a beach house.

[glitzyglow]

I feel like an ogre when it comes to dating/men. It is a strange position to find myself in because I am so happy for others when they find someone, I truly am. But I wonder what it wrong with me? It is incredibly disheartening. And I am so sick of people saying, "It will happen when it is supposed to happen." That feels like never.

After my exH left me in 2010, I ran around with a group of 4 other single girls. Two of them are now married, two of them are engaged, and I can't even get a 2nd date.

I tried to talk to my bff about it and I was surprised that he was so dismissive of my feelings. More of a, "Why do you want a relationship so much? They aren't always so great, you know" response, which I wasn't expecting. I haven't been in any sort of relationship for 5 years. I'm not looking to get married tomorrow, but it would be nice to meet someone to date or even have a relationship with. But I don't seem to hold appeal, I guess.

Sorry for the brain dump. It's all bubbling up as of late and it getting harder to contain.

[Eureka1984]

May 13, 2015 10:50:06 GMT -5 glitzyglow said:

I feel like an ogre when it comes to dating/men. It is a strange position to find myself in because I am so happy for others when they find someone, I truly am. But I wonder what it wrong with me? It is incredibly disheartening. And I am so sick of people saying, "It will happen when it is supposed to happen."

I feel like I could've written this. I am happy for others but c'mon really. I totally understand and will commiserate with you.

[calle28]

I'm sorry glitzyglow. Do you do online dating? I know we say this all the time here, but it really is a numbers game. I've been on more 1st dates than I can count and they rarely lead to seconds. But I've casually dated a few of them. It's definitely rough when your friends don't seem to understand or care.

My lame confession: I've done basically no work all week because I've been prepping and researching for my interview next week. I didn't post about it, but I finally have an interview for an HR position with a great company! I'd have to relocate to Amazon. I'm so excited/nervous!

[jojoandleo]

I feel like dating is just a big batch of fucking luck. I have met some amazing women who have the worst luck in the dating process and some absolute bitches who have had amazing luck. You just have to tough it out and keep trying. Or give up and open an animal rescue of your choice. Animals always love you. Even when you don't shave. AND, you can totally meet men at an animal rescue.

[glitzyglow]

calle28, I have done online dating several times over the course of the past 3 years. The few guys I did like didn't like me back.

[calle28]

May 13, 2015 11:08:52 GMT -5 glitzyglow said:

calle28, I have done online dating several times over the course of the past 3 years. The few guys I did like didn't like me back.

Yeah, I've been on and off for a year on OKCupid. Sometimes it's fun and I meet cool people. Other times I want to give up on dating forever.

[cuddlyevil]

I know way too much about the drama that is in the background in my office. I keep it all under my hat, but it's given me a lot of clarity on why some people treat me the way they do.

glitzyglow, I know it's going to sound trite, but you're awesome and if these guys you're dating can't see it then they're the ones with the issues--not you.

[Wanderista]

May 13, 2015 10:37:05 GMT -5 jojoandleo said:

May 13, 2015 10:01:56 GMT -5 Wanderista said:

I do have a kind of a flameful. I have a friend who other friends say is in a bad relationship. This is not the one who rushed into getting married, it's a different friend with questionable life choices. Anyway, some other friends who know this friend better than me say that this girl is in a bad, unhealthy relationship - like some kind of emotionally manipulative relationship. I haven't witnessed it myself but I don't see her that much. She fell out with these people because they told her that she should break up with the guy and she is now engaged. They were all really close before but now they don't speak and she unfriended them on FB.

The flameful part is that her fiance has a really awesome beach house. It's huge and it is right on the coast in a really nice beachy area. It has multiple balconies facing the ocean. Last year, I had a room with a private balcony like this. It is really nice and they invite friends out to stay with them for free, friends who don't criticize their relationship. I've been invited for up to a week this summer and I'll admit that I haven't thought twice about going. I totally will. He might be a terrible person but damn, that's an awesome beach house. I will go and have a great time.

I would go, but I would also be looking for signs of abuse/manipulation when I went.  I don't like just believing what other's say about a relationship, I like to see it for myself.  (Or, as in here, read the OP's posts about it myself )  BUUUT, if I saw signs of manipulation/abuse, there is no way in hell I would keep my mouth shut for a beach house.

Very true. I went last year and they seemed very happy. She is a little eccentric and he seemed to balance her out really well.  I have been told though that things got a lot worse afterwards and anyone who would try to talk to her about it would get shut out by her. 

Both she and the fiance have birthdays around the same time in June. The beach house belongs to his dad who lets him have it as a birthday present around then. Normally it is rented out in the summer.

He might be someone who puts on a nice front. When I've met him before, he seemed fine but I've only been around him in a big social group.

I will keep an eye out ... from a beach chair.

[Deleted]

@bigtowlittletoe, I missed about the background of your bf being away.  What's going on?  

[Deleted]

May 13, 2015 11:57:31 GMT -5 @blueyes623 said:

@bigtowlittletoe, I missed about the background of your bf being away.  What's going on?  

He's on a mantrip with some guy friends for 2ish weeks.  

[Deleted]

TR - This trip is just highlighting my feelings that I shouldn't have to compromise on something like caring, thoughtful communication.

[Deleted]

May 13, 2015 12:03:29 GMT -5 @bigtowlittletoe said:

May 13, 2015 11:57:31 GMT -5 @blueyes623 said:

@bigtowlittletoe, I missed about the background of your bf being away.  What's going on?  

He's on a mantrip with some guy friends for 2ish weeks.  

Ehh..that's long...I wouldn't love that. I know some people like to travel separately sometimes, but it's not for me. Feel free to vent. 

[bl]

I am right there with you glitzyglow

I also just saw that my toxic fwb from earlier this year is in a relationship and seems happy and I had to throw a little pity party for a minute. He is absolutely not healthy and I had no desire to be in a relationship with him, but when you add him, my xbf, and xh who are all in relationships and seem happy when I know they don't have their shit together I have to wonder why not me. I know rationally that in the long term I will be better for taking time to work on myself and not excepting less than what I know I deserve, but it still sucks sometimes.

[Deleted]

May 13, 2015 12:12:24 GMT -5 TR said:

May 13, 2015 12:07:44 GMT -5 @bigtowlittletoe said:

TR - This trip is just highlighting my feelings that I shouldn't have to compromise on something like caring, thoughtful communication.

Ah ok. How long have you two been together? Is he out of touch the whole time? 

Since December.  No, he periodically checks in (mainly b/c I said he needed to check in while he was gone), but the quality of such communications is lacking.  It's a pattern of manchild behavior.  

[cuddlyevil]

WG mocked the dora the explorer party hat that is sitting on my desk. It's a certainty that I am going to hide it in his desk now, possibly next to the "party girl" party hat that is in his office.

#movingsuckspleasesendhelp

[glitzyglow]

cuddlyevil, thanks for your sweet words. It just feels like if I'm supposedly that awesome, lots of guys seem to have no problem skipping out on me. #pityparty

[Deleted]

May 13, 2015 12:45:40 GMT -5 mp said:

@bigtowlittletoe I'm sorry, that sounds super annoying. Where is he at on this trip?

From day to day, who knows?  They started in the midwest and plan to end up in northern MA next week.  In between?  (shrug)

I don't really feel like hashing out all of my annoyances at this point.

[glitzyglow]

mp, thank you for the kind words. The last Stir event in Nashville appears to have taken place in May 2013. My schedule makes things hard since I'm off on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. I feel like I do things and go to events, but again, it's not like anyone talks to me. I did talk to a guy at the Derby party I went to...and he was there with his gf.

ETA: And the book club I joined and is me and three married couples. Whomp whomp.

[Deleted]

May 13, 2015 13:01:53 GMT -5 mp said:

May 13, 2015 13:01:04 GMT -5 @bigtowlittletoe said:

From day to day, who knows?  They started in the midwest and plan to end up in northern MA next week.  In between?  (shrug)

I don't really feel like hashing out all of my annoyances at this point.

Ugh. I was just thinking if he was, like, in some jungle in South America, I could understand sucky communication. lol.

LOLOLOL. No.  

[cuddlyevil]

May 13, 2015 12:38:18 GMT -5 glitzyglow said:

cuddlyevil, thanks for your sweet words. It just feels like if I'm supposedly that awesome, lots of guys seem to have no problem skipping out on me. #pityparty

It just means those guys are assholes and not worth your time. It's not you, it's them--f'real.

[bl]

mp I think that's a great suggestion. I know for a fact that my body language is more closed off in a bar setting because I just don't feel comfortable. I would love to find some girl friends to go out with that are better at that than me and maybe learn from them.