IL's drove 4 hours to come to our place over Thanksgiving 2 years ago. I expected them around 3 pm because the day before my husband told me they were leaving at 11 am. Instead they arrived at 1 pm. I didn't tell them to wait in the driveway because my husband would have never listened to that, but I said hi coldly and went in my room and shut the door. They sensed something was up and made up some excuse about having to run to CVS or McDonald's or something and came back in an hour. I was mad at my husband for telling me their ETA was 3 pm and then not updating me that they actually left much earlier which is why they arrived at 1 pm. It's like I needed to mentally prepare for them to come and them showing up early threw me off. I was also nearly 7 month pregnant at the time, but that wasn't really an excuse.
I wouldn't do it again now because I have a daughter and it would be wrong to pull stuff like this and set a bad example for her. Now I would have to teach her that we are supposed to get really excited when family shows up way earlier than expected because wow, what a treat! Even if inside I'm dying.
You would only not do it because of your daughter? How about because they didn't deserve your rude behavior?
My MIL is the kind of person who will be sugary sweet to my face and then text crap about me to my husband after she gets home. I don't want to hang out with them for any longer than I have to. I hate when they stay with us. It is absolutely an anxiety filled weekend for me and not enjoyable at all. Now with DD here, the focus is off me a little bit and more on her, but they are still judging away at how I am raising her. It's not just them, it's my husband's entire extended IL family. No matter how nice I am, they will always find fault with me and it is exhausting to be around people like that.
Well we are home and I am not sure what to think now. H talked to BIL as they used to be super close until he got married and now they rarely talk. H thought it was bc he was super busy with work, but it turns out he is on medical leave from working full time and only working a few hours a day. BIL says that wife doesn't have any issues with anyone or any anxiety only that she is more on the shy side.
The whole visit was super uncomfortable and everyone agreed that we won't be making the trip/effort again or if we do, hotel rooms for sure. BIL said he and wife really wanted us all to be there, but they did not act like it at all. The house was fifthly, they had no food at all aside from things only they were allowed to eat. They slept until noon when everyone else was up at 8. Then when we said we were leaving earlier than expected to get back and get stuff done, they mentioned they had to get ready for the work week and go grocery shopping etc. I don't know if they are just horrible hosts or what? I feel bad for his parents though since they made the very far drive and cut their stay with them since they felt so unwanted. The whole thing was just sad.