Do people know you are TTC?

[Deleted]

Hope everyone had a nice holiday weekend!

We had some friends over a bbq this weekend, and my husband "outed" us as TTC when babies came up in conversation.  I'm not upset, we hadn't discussed it one way or another - apparently I assumed we weren't telling people and he assumed we were! The way it came up was, he was giving our friends a tour of the new house, and when he got to the empty bedroom he said "we're not doing anything with this room yet because hopefully it will be a nursery soon!"

With few exception, I didn't know any of my friends were TTC until they announced they were pregnant, even when it would have come up in conversation.   

Have you told people you are TTC? (I doubt anyone "announces" it, I guess I mean if it comes up in conversation).

[kellikans]

We told people, but I wish we hadn't since we are 18 months in with no baby. I just get tired of people asking about it.

[Deleted]

May 25, 2015 18:00:12 GMT -5 kellikans said:

We told people, but I wish we hadn't since we are 18 months in with no baby. I just get tired of people asking about it.

That's what I was thinking. I can see that getting really old.

[Deleted]

The only people I told were two close friends and my sister. It came up in conversation. I got pregnant and we told our family and s few friends early at 6 weeks. I then miscarried so now those people who knew about the pregnancy know that we are TTC.

[Aquatica]

I told my best friend(cousin) because I needed support when I was getting depressed at how long it's been taking. Then, I told my Mom because I was getting tired of her "you're not getting any younger" comments and now I get "it'll happen when it happens" comments instead. Everyone my S/O works with knows we're trying since my S/O is very excited about it and plays with other people's kids.

[msmerymac]

My mom kind of knows, but I try not to talk in detail. Otherwise, I'll tell people that we'd like kids if it comes up, but I'd probably be uncomfortable saying I'm off BC or TTCing outright.

[callmehales]

my closest friends knew when we started TTC. i didn't tell my family because i didn't want to be hounded/wanted it to be a surprise when we announced. well SURPRISE, it's been almost 18 months and i've had maybe 3 out of 20+ cycles that weren't like clockwork.

so now my family knows we're in the IF camp, because i blurted it out to my mom when she called the morning we had our RE appt and found out we'd have to do IVF for a chance at a bio kid.

[nellgirl]

The only people who know are a friend from work who I feel 100% comfortable telling anything to. Another friend thinks we're letting the cards fall where they may.
It's been a year, so I'm glad ppl don't know. I couldn't deal with the questions at this point.

[awick14]

A few close friends, and my mom know and I'm assuming the rest of the family thinks we are. It's been a year and a half since our very public loss.

Recently I told MIL and SIL that we are not trying and we do not wish to discuss the subject and further. (This was after SIL kept asking if I was pregnant every 2 seconds.) I don't care if they do find out, as long as it's never mentioned to me again.

I told my mom the other day that we are starting treatment because my body now hates me, and isn't ovulating anymore, and a few friends Blaine this as well.

[raangoli]

I assume that our close friends and family who know about our loss know that we continue to try. But other than that, no I don't really talk about it outside of the boards.

[slcjess]

Yes, most people know. Pretty much the moment we got married people started hounding us about kids, so when people ask, I say 'working on it!', mostly because I'm hoping it will make them uncomfortable and they'll stop asking. Ha. I don't ever bring it up, but I don't have a problem with confirming if people ask. Last time I was at ILs, my FIL asked me 3 times, so when we left I told my H that the next time he asks, I'm whipping out my FF app so that he can have a detailed view of my temps and cm. lol.

[mpc]

In the beginning I didn't want people to know. Now that's it's been a year, I'm more open to talking about it. I think I just need support. And I'm tired of random comments that are unintentionally hurtful. I assume everyone who knows about our miscarriage figures that we are trying in some form.

[oneslybookworm]

We really didn't tell anyone in the beginning. I had a few close friends I mentioned that we were going to start trying, but that was it. After a year or so, when we started looking into testing because we hadn't gotten pregnant yet, I asked a few friends what to expect (those that I knew had undergone fertility treatments)...so they knew. Now that we're past the two year mark, I'm sure people know. My colleagues at work know because I take off time frequently for appointments and treatments at the RE. My parents know we want kids and "if it happens, great" but they have no idea we're IF or that we're undergoing treatments. I prefer it that way, as my relationship with my family is strained at best.

[annabear07]

The first time just my closest friends knew. I knew my mom would be obnoxious about it and I wasn't comfortable having that conversation with the in laws.

This time around, again close friends and my mom kinda knows that we want our second sooner rather than later, but then she started asking me about condoms and I placed out of that conversation!

I only tell those that won't pressure us and are there for support or venting. Which is a pretty small group!

[daisy]

Not many people outside of the Internet know we're TTC. I didn't want to tell family because I imagined having a fun "surprise we're pregnant!" moment and DH is super private so he was on board with not telling. At this point, almost a year in, I'm not as concerned about people knowing. I've told my mom because she was with me when I got a call about lab work and my closest friends know. Like mpc said, I'm tired of rude comments. Just last week a CW told me if I'm going to have kids I needed to get started. Normally I just shrug that off but she kept on and on and until I said "Well, it doesn't happen as easily for some people!". Usually I stick with "we'd love to have kids one day" but I just couldn't handle her anymore. /Vent. lol

I think if we reach a full year of trying without success I'll be more open to talking about TTC if it comes up.

[ouokie]

Mainly family and close friends know that we have been TTCing for a while. Since we have gotten pregnant in the past and then miscarried we have told some people. Also, it's great that my inlaws know so when I need them to watch DD if I have an appointment I don't have to worry about trying to explain.

[macmars45]

My immediate family knows and one of my sisters is also TTC. My close friends/BFFs know and one of my BFFs is also TTC.

[rockinrobyn]

I haven't told many people. My mom and dad know and his mom most likely. But it isn't something we talk about openly. Mainly becuase I think they are scared to bring it up because of my miscarriage. I talk openly about it at work with a few close friends there, mainly because I am always leaving from work for tests.

[starryfish]

My parents and sister know

[loira]

Most people know because the loss of our daughter was so public. We don't talk about it though, and it's certainly not something I would bring up in conversation with anyone other than very close friends or my mum and dad. My ILs don't even know about our 2 miscarriages last fall, nor the fact that we've already done some RPL testing. Luckily I live in Britain where strangers are not overly friendly or folksy, and even colleagues would never discuss such things, so I never get random people asking me about it.

[Deleted]

Most people know that we are alright with it if it happens, but only a few probably know that we are really TTC. DD is still only 13 months, so we haven't gotten too much input on why I'm not KU yet.