Post by trafficgirl on Jun 30, 2015 11:40:46 GMT -5
The boys (a little over 1.5 years) start daycare tomorrow. H and I are both going in to drop them off and get them situated for the first day - I'm nervous, but I think they'll be fine after we leave.
What I'm more nervous about is doing drop off/pick up alone. H will do it Mon-Thurs and I will do it Fridays. The boys can walk, but aren't good at following directions. They are clingy in new environments and want to be picked up/carried. I cannot carry both of them at the same time (too heavy and I hurt my back recently). So one is likely to be carried and the other upset - the upset one is then likely to either drop right down and cry or run off and cry in frustration. Plus the added confusion of cars and other people doing drop off.
Help me with the logistics of getting them out the car and in the door at the same time. It's not that far (somewhere between 50-100 feet), but I'm worried it's going to be a mess. Like I will literally be dragging my crying kids across the pavement to get into daycare.
Anecdotes? Words of wisdom? Do I need to get leashes on them so I don't worry about them getting run over by a car?
Don't carry them. Even tomorrow when there are 2 of you. Make a big deal about how they are big boys going off to daycare and you know what big boys do? They hold their mom/dad's hand to walk in! Such a big step for such big boys! And make sure your DH sticks to this on his days so that it's pretty much the expected action.
And really- in the end, if this doesn't work and it's just a total cluster? I'd actually probably do leashes. In the end, their safety trumps everything else.
Post by floridakat on Jun 30, 2015 11:45:24 GMT -5
My twins were done with strollers by that age. Do you have a lightweight double that you could use to get them in? If not, I would make a big deal out of "school" being a big-kid thing, and big kids walk! Maybe have them wear their own (tiny) backpacks, then each hold your hand on either side. I wouldn't pick one up over the other, because my girls would have flipped over that, too.
I have the same question as papie-- how does it usually work when you take them places? I don't have twins, so I'm legitimately asking.
I'm not exactly mom of the year. I would bribe them with promises of m&ms or their preferred (single bite) candy if they walk nicely to their class.
Worst case scenerio, can you see the cars from the door of the daycare? I'm wondering if you can recruit the director/front desk person to help you in an emergency. Like, take kid one in only as far as the front desk, then go back for second kid.
Post by trafficgirl on Jun 30, 2015 11:51:18 GMT -5
papie - No ring sling. And I don't go anywhere with them by myself that doesn't involve a shopping cart Well, almost. If I had to go to the Dr or somewhere by myself I would strap them in a stroller.
Which I guess I could do for daycare, though they don't really like it. I just think it would be difficult to manage as there's a two stage entryway with locks at the daycare and people will be coming and going at drop off.
Post by underwaterrhymes on Jun 30, 2015 11:54:32 GMT -5
Honestly daycare drop offs go so much more smoothly when K walks in. If I carry him, he's much more likely to cry and cling to me than if he's holding my hand.
papie - No ring sling. And I don't go anywhere with them by myself that doesn't involve a shopping cart Well, almost. If I had to go to the Dr or somewhere by myself I would strap them in a stroller.
Which I guess I could do for daycare, though they don't really like it. I just think it would be difficult to manage as there's a two stage entryway with locks at the daycare and people will be coming and going at drop off.
The stroller could work too imo, if that is what you normally use. Lots of people walk to our daycare and leave the stroller just outside the front door while they drop off.
Can you talk to the director about your concerns? 1 1/2 is a common age for kids to not cooperate at drop off, and I'm sure you are not the first parent of twins at this center.
Maybe ask the director how they've seen other parents handle twins who are not cooperating with walking in?
Are you able to get there early or at an off time? I would always try to get the closest spot in case someone had the urge to bolt that day. I did as others suggested- made a big deal out of being big boys, backpacks, etc. and just held their hands. The director actually really discouraged carrying once they were old enough to walk. If it comes down to it, someone might be able to meet you outside and help. When I was on mat leave and would have the baby carrier, a teacher would come out if she saw me and help with the boys.
Post by revolution on Jun 30, 2015 11:58:29 GMT -5
I would set expectations that they are big boys and going to a new school and at the new school you have to walk and hold hands. Their job is to walk and look how great it is. Play it up. Tell them about it tonight. Talk about it on the way to the daycare. Make them walk and hold hands.
Do you have key fobs for entry? Can you "bribe" the one walking/holding your hand to use the key fob to open the door and hold the other one?
DH gives DS the fob to open the doors and it worked well for me on days he wants me to hold him (it's not a normal routine that I do drop off so it's always a little more hectic).
Can you talk to the director about your concerns? 1 1/2 is a common age for kids to not cooperate at drop off, and I'm sure you are not the first parent of twins at this center.
Maybe ask the director how they've seen other parents handle twins who are not cooperating with walking in?
This is why I ask questions - because for whatever reason I had not thought of that. Duh - I will call her today.
Thanks for the replies all!
And Les Paul - I should have included that info in the OP. Hope my reply didn't come off harsh.
Do you have key fobs for entry? Can you "bribe" the one walking/holding your hand to use the key fob to open the door and hold the other one?
DH gives DS the fob to open the doors and it worked well for me on days he wants me to hold him (it's not a normal routine that I do drop off so it's always a little more hectic).
No fobs. It's a two-stage entrance where the first door is open, then you walk into this little area where you enter in a key code into a pad, then the main door unlocks and you walk into the facility. The little area is small - a double stroller plus the person wheeling it would basically take up the entire space.
Post by crispnclean on Jun 30, 2015 12:03:55 GMT -5
I would get one out of his carseat and set him on the floor of the car or in the front seat while you get the other out of this carseat. Then just have them walk and hold your hand. I find if I talk excitedly about DS's teacher and all the fun things they are going to do at school that day, he seems to be more focused on getting to the door (he's 21 months). At 18 months, he was good about holding my hand and walking in. It was rare that he threw himself to the ground on the walk in or out.
I think putting them in the stroller for 50-100 feet between your car and the door seems like more work than it's worth.
papie - No ring sling. And I don't go anywhere with them by myself that doesn't involve a shopping cart Well, almost. If I had to go to the Dr or somewhere by myself I would strap them in a stroller.
Which I guess I could do for daycare, though they don't really like it. I just think it would be difficult to manage as there's a two stage entryway with locks at the daycare and people will be coming and going at drop off.
But those people are other parents, they get it and will help hold doors
Post by thebreakfastclub on Jun 30, 2015 14:07:57 GMT -5
I honestly would get leashes.
My son is almost 2.5, there's only one of him, and he can be a beast at pick up. He is fine with walking in for drop off, but I think he's spent at the end of the day and he's a jackass at least half of the afternoons.
I would also give them a snack to hold as they walk out, like a graham cracker or something easy. That helps.
Post by ninjabridemom on Jun 30, 2015 14:08:04 GMT -5
Oh girl, okay. This is what I did when they were that age (also when they started daycare). It was overwhelming and I think I posted about it too.
I ran their stuff down first while they were situated inside, then I got my backpack on and took them down to the car holding my hand. They were good enough to do that. In winter or in a rush, I would do the stairs in shifts -- keep one at the top sitting on the top step, carry the other down and sit him on the bottom step, repeat w 2nd kid. Then when we got to the car I would have one touch the car while I buckled the other in. I could NOT have both in there at the same time b/c the seats were still RF and there wasn't enough room. When they go to FF you will be able to put them both in the same side and then buckle in one at a time. I put the kid on the passenger side in first (we alternated but I did that side first) then driver side. That way I could just jump in afterwards.
Then when we got to school I did the reverse -- took the one out of the driver side first, touch the car!, get out brother.
It's hectic but you will get into a good rhythm soon.
ETA if it isn't clear -- I did everything holding hands. It took forever, truly, but it worked better than trying to carry both etc. Trying to maneuver a stroller at drop off etc will be more cumbersome than it's worth (I know, I use the stroller on half of our walks now but it used to be all of them) ETA2 and you'll be better off if you plow through the walking, they will get used to it quickly. For the first few weeks, if it's easier on you, sure, but I promise -- they will learn to walk better holding hands, they will learn stairs or whatever, it will really be more long-run beneficial to walk them to the car etc.
Post by ninjabridemom on Jun 30, 2015 14:09:39 GMT -5
Oh and you just establish a rule now -- no picking up, except stairs as needed. Even then, the more you do stairs w them, the better they'll get.
"Sorry, baby, I can't pick you both up so you have to suck it up."
And yes -- sometimes you will be almost dragging 2 crying kids into daycare. That's okay. Eff the haters! It happens. You WILL have rough mornings. Accept that now. Most will be fine, a few more will be great.
Post by ninjabridemom on Jun 30, 2015 14:15:12 GMT -5
I had to become MUCH more Holly Hardass when we started daycare. It's just the reality. I still am sometimes even w the looser timecrunch in the mornings.
Snacks in the car for sure, especially for after.
Also be prepared for rough afternoons for a bit. We still have them when they've been really busy. It's just like "real" school -- there's so much going on, even w a nap, they need decompression time before dinner. And usualy food lol.
My twins are now 7, but started daycare at 9 months, 3 days a week. To get them in the door I used a single umbrella style stroller. I put one in the stroller and then carried one. It was so much easier for me than a double and very easy to get in the door. An umbrella is super easy to set up and take down so even when they both started walking it was so much faster to use the umbrella. I just didn't have the patience for them to walk, lol. When I did pick up I would bring in an empty stroller strap one in and scoop up the other and head to the car.
Post by formerlyak on Jun 30, 2015 14:43:06 GMT -5
I was also going to suggest a snack. Mine is 15 months but had trouble the first week he transitioned to the toddler room from his infant room. We noticed a lot of kids dropped off early had a little pre-breakfast snack, so we started sending some fruit or something. He knows he gets to sit and eat it as soon as we get in there so he's pretty good at drop off now.
I did the same in preschool with my now 9 year old. It worked for some many of the kids that the teachers who opened had a special breakfast table for them to sit at and eat before they played as mom or dad said good-bye.
Post by shananagins on Jun 30, 2015 14:54:40 GMT -5
I used a Mclaren double umbrella stroller to get to and from the car until my girls were around 3. I didn't usually buckle them in unless they were fussing so it was really quick and easy. I would park, get the stroller out, put their bag on the handle, get kid 1 out and into the stroller then kid 2 and we were ready to go. To me, it was easier to use the stroller to cross the parking lot instead of trying to coax my girls to walk. They are only just now at 3 willing to walk with me and not flop on the ground because I insist on holding hands.
We have a couple set of twin toddlers and babies at my kids daycare / preschool. The director comes out to help the moms/parent every morning. She calls her on her cell phone and then waits for the director to have a free moment. I know she has had to wait a few minutes before so make sure you leave yourself enough time in the morning for waiting.
Same thing with pick up. The director walks with her out to her car to help load the kids.
I always thought that was super awesome. I bet if you asked for the help, your director would do it.