Help me not be a hypocrite

[meltoine]

Thanks all!

[pennylane]

In that situation, I'd move home. I think having family around to help out when you need it would be a huge pro. A year without a great support system and 3 kids sounds rough. I think the kids are young enough that switching schools wouldn't be as big of a deal as it would be if they were older.

I am a fan of doing whatever will make your life more manageable during a deployment.

[amaristella]

I think my actions probably speak for me.

I chose option "I don't care how fucking much it costs". I need to be closer to my (non-military)family this year. For a number of reasons.

It was expensive and burdensome. I didn't want to stay because everyone else there is on shore duty. The sense of community is not the same as when he goes out on a ship or with a group. I figured if my son cannot have his dad for 11 months then he needs to have his grandparents.

Edit to say: Other people I spoke to who had school aged children told me that they would have done the same thing in my shoes. Even with their school aged children. So it's not even just for little kids that aren't in school yet.

[killercupcake]

Why would you be a hypocrite? Because you moved home?

Naw.

I lived with my parents for long stretches at a time while H did his thing and I did mine. It was best for us at the time, so I don't care what anyone thought based on incomplete and lacking information.

Do what would be best for you, your H, and your kids.

[bina]

I think moving closer to family would be what I would do in that situation. A support system is really important

[VillainV]

I would probably move home. Would you at least be close to SOME base to take advantage of commissary, etc? If so, that might slightly defray the HCOL...

[meltoine]

Jul 21, 2015 22:20:29 GMT -5 VillainV said:

I would probably move home. Would you at least be close to SOME base to take advantage of commissary, etc? If so, that might slightly defray the HCOL...

My mom's house is about 30 mins from West Point. 

Its mostly the the cost of housing I'm concerned about. All the 3br apartments are more than twice our mortgage (including taxes and insurance and utilities). 

[kpol]

You have to do what's best for you and your family. If that's moving near family, so be it! Think of your sanity here!

[brandienee]

Team do what's best for you and your family.

If you can work it out to afford it, move to where you'll have established support. I am sure your family would love for you to be close to them. Otherwise, try to expand your network where you are. I am sure that you can find civilian mom groups around.

I hate the 365 deployment option though. That sounds awful.

[Ashsmash]

I don't have kids and in your situation I would probably still move back home lol. I made H push for Nevada instead of Georgia for this PCS so we would be close to our families in SoCal.

[dcn]

Oh gosh I would move home too. It would be worth the extra housing costs to have support close by.

[audette]

Do what's best for your family. Sounds like that would include moving home...