So wrong but so right

[mrsukyankee]

Link

A recent Reddit post asked users the following question: “The United States is a bar, what is each State doing and drinking?” Special credit goes to Reddit user motherboy, who is the individual mastermind behind many of them.  Here's one example:

Pennsylvania is a cheery, pretty brunette girl with blue eyes, dressed fairly preppy. She's drinking Yuengling and making out with a handful of other states.  (because it's my state and I had to laugh...Yuengling!)

[amberlyrose]

I spit my food out at Wisconsin because that is totally my BIL.

[Ohhmm(bligo)]

That really does sum us up!

[oliviapope]

"Texas is singing karaoke about how great Texas is."

So accurate.

[lilafowler]

YUP! Lolololol
"Massachusetts is in a bar fight with New York over sports."

[lilafowler]

Omg lol
AutumnRose25
"Connecticut is a rich white woman sipping a martini and silently judging all the other states."

[pandorica]

Jul 29, 2015 9:36:55 GMT -5 lilafowler said:

YUP! Lolololol
"Massachusetts is in a bar fight with New York over sports."

So accurate.

[toepick]

"Kentucky would be drinking bourbon and arguing with anybody who will listen about college basketball."

This is spot on.

[aliciaflorrick]

This is amazingly accurate in my experience. Too funny!

[Bernadine]

Maryland is drinking a Chesapeake margarita. Rim lined with Old Bay. He is insisting that everyone try his drink because it's really good if you just give it a chance, but no one else seems to get it.

I don't even know what a Chesapeak margarita is? Lol. I think drinking a Natty Boh at an O's game would have been more appropriate.

[captainobvious]

California is constantly buying drinks for others, yet has failing kidneys from lack of hydration. (wilted)

[shoeaholic]

This is so funny and so accurate!

[revolution]

Yep, that is PA.

[NothingWrongwithOhio]

I am dead at NY/NJ.

[shell403b]

I read this "article" this morning--some of them are funny, but the grammar was terrible and at least one state ISN'T EVEN IN THE DAMN BAR!

[RoxMonster]

Illinois is a larger gentleman, eating deep dish pizza and drinking a Goose Island. He's reminiscing about the '85 Bears and how "this is the Cubs year".

LOL

[mrsd2006]

Georgia will be drinking bud light, wearing a UGA trucker hat, tortoise Costa Del Mar sunglasses with croakies, solid colored Polo shirt, questionably short shorts with a UGA belt, and driving a Z71 with a Browning decal in their rear window (even though he only went hunting twice, in Jr High) and a UGA license plate frame. He went to Valdosta State University, and he works in his dad’s local business.

I have at least five pairs of tortoise Costa del Mar sunglasses, one UGA trucker hat and one UGA license plate (at least DH is a graduate!)

But I drink Miller Lite.

[Deleted]

Kansas is spot on.

Nebraska is missing from the bar.

[zitiqueen]

Michigan is drinking some micro brew and playing Euchre while trying to conjure up nice things to say about Detroit.

This is pretty balls-on accurate. My cousins are visiting from the East Coast (they come every summer) and they always want to play euchre. The first hand is always the practice hand where they re-learn the rules because they only get to play once a year when they come to visit.

We used to joke that my high school wouldn't let you graduate if you didn't know how to play euchre.

[Moe]

Puerto Rico is standing outside staring through the window, wishing it could join the party

/tear.

Though no.  PR doesn't need no stinkin' bars.  They're outside drinking limoncillo in the beach, pointing and laughing at the US when we're freezing and they're out in Icacos or Condado.

[georgeharrison]

Haha - especially the recycling part:

Washington is a pale girl, very quiet and reluctant to be friendly to anyone except Oregon. She has glasses and a couple books, and isn't drinking because she's enjoying a cup of coffee she got from her favorite place on the way here. She loves hiking with her boyfriend and watching indie movies and documentaries on Netflix. She suddenly yells at New Jersey for throwing a napkin on the floor and not in the correct recycling bin.

[jinkies]

Jul 29, 2015 10:29:45 GMT -5 @ruralrabbit1 said:

Nebraska is missing from the bar.

Nebraska is listed at the top under Alaska. They are both 20 drinks in before showing up at the bar.

I'm from PA, but I loved the Delaware description:

Delaware is that guy who hangs around the outside of the New York, Pennsylvania, Maryland and New Jersey friend-circle, taking occasional sips from his Yuengling and mostly being ignored, except when New York has to go past him to get to the bar.

[sashimi]

Jul 29, 2015 10:21:46 GMT -5 RoxMonster said:

Illinois is a larger gentleman, eating deep dish pizza and drinking a Goose Island. He's reminiscing about the '85 Bears and how "this is the Cubs year".

LOL

I could see that!! I could also see Illinois and Wisconsin arguing who has a better football team Bears or Green Bay. (I live in Schaumburg and I'm married to a Green Bay fan)

[sangria]

Maine, AZ and Massachusetts are SPOT ON.

This is hysterical.

Poor Puerto Rico lol.

[bernsteincat]

Jul 29, 2015 9:54:43 GMT -5 toepick said:

"Kentucky would be drinking bourbon and arguing with anybody who will listen about college basketball."

This is spot on.

I plan on doing a bit of this this weekend when we head to the 'Ville. COME AT ME, BRO.

[okla]

Oh man, the Oklahoma one is sad. And sadly accurate.

"Oklahoma is an obese couple who have not moved from their spots since sitting down next to Texas. They have on sweatpants, and brought in fast food to eat at the bar. They are drinking Bud Light bottles."

[Deleted]

New Hampshire could not be more wrong.

it should be " New Hampshire is 2 pretty but sad looking girls dancing seductively trying to get MA to stop fighting and pay attention to them. One is dressed in a bright pink neon bikini and draped in cheesy souvenir beach jewelry with fried blonde hair. The other is wearing the full Harley-Davidson Gear and Chaps. Occasionally they try to butt into MA and NYs argument but mostly just making out with each other and screaming LIVE FREE OR DIE ( which they also both have tattooed on their backs in the tramp stamp area) They are drinking large iced coffees from Dunkins and whatever anyone buys for them ( mostly novelty shots and cheap beer)".

[cabbagecabbage]

Jul 29, 2015 10:21:46 GMT -5 RoxMonster said:

Illinois is a larger gentleman, eating deep dish pizza and drinking a Goose Island. He's reminiscing about the '85 Bears and how "this is the Cubs year".

LOL

I feel like this is one guy and he definitely exists but I'm annoyed that all of Illinois is always just Chicago north of North Ave.

[Deleted]

Jul 29, 2015 10:19:25 GMT -5 shell403b said:

I read this "article" this morning--some of them are funny, but the grammar was terrible and at least one state ISN'T EVEN IN THE DAMN BAR!

You sound like fun

[elenetxu]

Jul 29, 2015 13:31:29 GMT -5 @savestheday said:

New Hampshire could not be more wrong.

it should be " New Hampshire is 2 pretty but sad looking girls dancing seductively trying to get MA to stop fighting and pay attention to them. One is dressed in a bright pink neon bikini and draped in cheesy souvenir beach jewelry with fried blonde hair. The other is wearing the full Harley-Davidson Gear and Chaps. Occasionally they try to butt into MA and NYs argument but mostly just making out with each other and screaming LIVE FREE OR DIE ( which they also both have tattooed on their backs in the tramp stamp area) They are drinking large iced coffees from Dunkins and whatever anyone buys for them ( mostly novelty shots and cheap beer)".

Where in NH are you from??
I thought the description was quite good.