How angry would you be? Kid/School related

[runmama]

My son is six and in First Grade. They started last Monday the 24th. Yesterday he told his teacher he needed to use the restroom. She said "No, it's not time to go right now." He waited a little while and asked again explaining that it was an emergency. She told him again "No, it's not time yet." 

He ended up pooping his pants at school. He was so afraid that he would get into trouble that he didn't tell anyone, he just tried to clean it up himself the next time it was "time" to go.

The boys restroom is literally directly across the hallway from their classroom. I could probably stand in her doorway and nearly touch the damn door.

I was livid yesterday and I didn't want to say anything in anger, so I went in and spoke calmly with her this morning. She told me that it is district policy that they only allow the children to use the restroom 3 times a day and they all have to go as a class. Anything beyond that requires a doctor's note. And even with the doctor's note he will not be allowed to use the restroom that is three fucking steps away from his classroom, he will have to go to the office.

Am I being unreasonable here or is this absolutely asinine? I should add that he is not the type of child to say he needs to go so he can get out of class to go play. CLEARLY he was telling the truth.

[eb777888]

OMG. Your poor kid. I'd be fucking livid. I'm pretty easy going but I'd be burn it down pissed.

[TrickyBob]

I would be PISSED.

If a child is telling you it is an emergency, it is much easier for the teacher to let him go than to make him feel embarrassed for pooping his pants.

Fucking "rules"

[textbookcase]

I would be "burn the motherfucker down" livid. Not okay.

[redheadk]

Escalate to the principal.

[compassrose]

I'd be over there reaming someone a new asshole first thing in the morning.

(Stepparent, so in my case I'd have SO do the reaming.)

[Jalapeñomel]

Three times a day?? I can't do that, so I would not expect a child to have to do that.

[bittybomb]

I would be rip roaring pissed as fucking hell and everybody would know about it.

Holy shit.

Your poor little boy. I can't even imagine how he must have felt. I hope his teacher is put in a situation where she has to shit her pants and then sit in it until someone else deems it an appropriate "time" to use the restroom.

I am livid for you!

eta - my son is about to start 2nd grade, but last year they used the buddy system for bathroom breaks that fell outside of designated times.  Way more appropriate than denying someone the restroom. 

[balletofangels]

I would be hard pressed to find a situation that would make me angrier.

[vamoose]

I would go get a doctors note TODAY. Then I would meet with the principal tomorrow and plan to reach out to the school board if necessary. I would first get the doctors note though so that you can be sure your child can go whenever necessary. I would imagine any pedi would write that note.

[rugbywife]

I mean, you can escalate it to the principal but if it's a district policy you might have to go higher (?). I can't imagine why the class HAS to go to the washroom as a class. We do except our grade 1s to go in pairs but that's about it.

[WOUNDTIGHT]

BURN IT DOWN. She humiliated your son and made him soil himself. BURN. IT. DOWN.

[noradog]

THIS IS ASININE AND I WOULD BE LIVID.

[miso]

That is an inane policy.

Escalate as high as you need to go.

ML will help you write a strongly worded letter.

[killercupcake]

Oh hell no.

The elementary school I interned at had class bathroom breaks, but let the kids go if it was an emergency, because DUH.

I'd burn it down.

[1confused1]

I wouldn't be able to put in words how angry I would be.

[sunshineluv]

I don't believe that there is a policy like that. After I raised hell to the principal I would request a copy of that policy. A doctors note to use the restroom without the class? It can't be real.!

[frkls]

fuck that noise!!! i'd be furious. your poor kiddo!

[Alyssa]

I think when you have a child who has asked more than once then it's a clear sign that they need to go. I would be in with the principal giving them a piece of my mind over this one. No child should be soiling themselves because a teacher denied them access to the bathroom. That is so wrong and I feel terrible for your son that he had to go through that at school.

[runmama]

Doctor's note is being picked up first thing in the morning. I should have added that I spoke with the principal immediately after speaking with the teacher, and while very apologetic, she basically echoed everything the teacher said and stuck to the "district policy". He'll have to use the office restroom, with the doctor's note. He, under no circumstances, will be allowed to walk the 3 steps to the restroom across from his classroom. Ridiculous.

[noradog]

Actually, the more I think on it, the angrier it makes me. She should be ashamed for putting him in such a humiliating position.

[mom2twoboys]

That is not right and I have never heard of that rule. I would go to the principal or counselor and see what they say. I am so sorry he had to go through that.

[Deleted]

As a NON PARENT! I am seething!! WTAF!! I want a copy of that "policy" in writing... WTAF?!?!?

[miniroller]

Yes, non-mom here who would be livid. But also just wanted to add my heart breaks for your poor little guy! I really hope this doesn't affect his perception of school/ future in this class/ with this teacher. Argh! Super not trying to cause further worry, OP, I just feel so awful he had this terrible experience at the beginning of school Sending great vibes for short-term memory & quick recovery!!

[rugbywife]

Um, I would be writing a letter to the editor of the local paper regarding the school board's policy. I mean, I personally couldn't, because I work for the school board and it would look bad, lol, but I would get someone to if that is me. That policy is complete bullshit. Bathroom time should not be limited, medical note or not.

[vamoose]

Can you imagine being in a room with your coworkers, you try to use the restroom, boss locks the door (which is the adult equivalent) and says no, and makes you wait so long that your only option is to shit your pants, sit in your shit and then try to slyly use the bathroom and clean yourself when it is finally time for you and all your coworkers to use the restroom together??? I just... no. That is awful.

[Deleted]

Sept 1, 2015 18:09:21 GMT -5 rugbywife said:

Um, I would be writing a letter to the editor of the local paper regarding the school board's policy. I mean, I personally couldn't, because I work for the school board and it would look bad, lol, but I would get someone to if that is me. That policy is complete bullshit. Bathroom time should not be limited, medical note or not.

Heck i would be contacting local news stations.

[wannabe]

My head just exploded. I am so sorry your son had to go through that.

Light that shit on FIRE.

[killercupcake]

That is the most bogus school district policy I've ever heard. Fuck that. Take it up the chain.

[eddy]

Burn it fucking down.

Start a riot.