Fine on a shower invite. True, most people can find a registry on their own with a little bit of googling, but the purpose of a shower is to give gifts, so it's entirely appropriate to include registry info in there.
The only caveat is if the parents-to-be are hosting their own shower (or some other party that isn't a "shower"), which is a whole different issue...
Post by Mrs.Rad888 on Sept 1, 2015 22:58:58 GMT -5
I appreciate it on shower invitations. In fact, I actually appreciate it on invitations to any event where gift giving is expected. Why is an etiquette breach if it's on wedding invitations when you're most likely going to be sending a gift for the happy couple?
Post by whitepicketfence on Sept 2, 2015 7:18:09 GMT -5
I would expect it to be included on the invite and would be extremely annoyed if I had to call the hostess to find out where the mom-to-be was registered.
Totally fine. The purpose of the shower is to give gifts so give the info. If it was a wedding invite it would be tacky but any sort of shower is fine. In fact I attended a baby shower that didn't include any info on registries and it as annoying. I tried a few of the common baby places and couldn't find a registry so I just went with diapers and a gift card.
I vote ok for baby and wedding showers, but no other occasions. I'm not annoyed if it's missing (there are plenty of online registry finders for that issue) but I'm sure it's helpful for folks who aren't inclined to shop online.
I cringed a tad when my brother and his Fi put it on their wedding invitations.
Why is an etiquette breach if it's on wedding invitations when you're most likely going to be sending a gift for the happy couple?
Because a wedding invitation is typically issued by a couple or their parents and it is considered rude to solicit gifts for yourself or your child. A shower is traditionally thrown by a friend or non-immediate family member so there isn't the "give ME a gift" tone that there would be to a wedding invitation with registry information. Also, the very point of the shower is to shower the bride or expectant mother with gifts, so it is okay for the host of the shower to share the registry information. Also, a wedding invitation is far more formal than a shower invitation, so different conventions apply.
The Post family take on it:
There’s a funny catch about wedding gift etiquette: If you’re invited to a wedding, you’re expected to give a gift, regardless of whether or not you attend. But in order to keep the focus on your guests rather than the gifts, registry information should never be included with the wedding invitation. That goes for any enclosures, too. Some stores give out little “We are registered at this store” cards for you to oh-so-conveniently include with your invitations -- but don’t. Any mention of the registry on or with the invitation is like saying, “We hope you can come to the wedding. Now, about that gift we all know you’ll be sending…”
Good etiquette is also usually quite practical. I’m not a fan of fussy rules for their own sake, but this is one case where I think the extra effort is worth it. Without a wedding website, word of mouth is your best and only option that isn’t on the tacky side. Tell your close friends, family and your wedding party where you’re registered. This isn’t grasping for gifts -- it’s how registry information has always been shared. Say, “If any other guests ask you [which they very well might], we’re registered at _____.” It’s also entirely likely, and perfectly okay, that guests will ask you directly where you’re registered. Let them know, “We’re registered at XYZ store, but anything you choose would be wonderful. Thank you!” As a bride planning her wedding right now, I’ve gotten that question quite a bit lately, which means my fiancé and I better hurry up and figure out our registry soon!
It is, however, okay to include registry information with bridal shower invitations. The point of the shower is that you are getting gifts; thus it’s okay, and convenience wins. The host can include the registry information with the shower invitation. This is the right place to put those little store-provided registry cards to use, or to include a slip of paper with the information. Some shower hosts don’t include registry information at all, and instead, only share it with those guests who RSVP “yes”. Though it’s not required, some shower guests who can’t attend might like to send a gift anyway, so I think it’s nice to include the information with the invite.
If you do choose to have a wedding website, adding the site to the enclosures sent with the invitation can be a nice bridge. Simply include the web address along with any maps or directions. When guests check the site, the registry information will be there. It’s a step removed, but I think it's a step worth taking.
SS because it does matter to me. Registry information should be on any shower invitation. The purpose of a shower is to "shower" the guest of honor with gifts.
Post by mainelyfoolish on Sept 2, 2015 9:31:03 GMT -5
Please include the registry information, but spell it correctly. This sentiment brought to you by the recent bridal shower I attended where the bride was supposedly registered at "Bed Beth and Beyond."
SS because it does matter to me. Registry information should be on any shower invitation. The purpose of a shower is to "shower" the guest of honor with gifts.
Agree. Inviting people to a gift-giving party and then purposely making it more difficult for them to buy that gift is poor form. Showers are the one time this info actually *should* be included.
SS because it does matter to me. Registry information should be on any shower invitation. The purpose of a shower is to "shower" the guest of honor with gifts.
Agree. Inviting people to a gift-giving party and then purposely making it more difficult for them to buy that gift is poor form. Showers are the one time this info actually *should* be included.
I mean, I'm already being invited to a baby shower, which is basically the 15th circle of hell for me. DO NOT make me work to give the gift I'm going to send in lieu of actually attending.
Please include the registry information, but spell it correctly. This sentiment brought to you by the recent bridal shower I attended where the bride was supposedly registered at "Bed Beth and Beyond."
At least tell me the bride's name is Beth...
Nope. Ashley.
Bed Beth and Beyond sounds like a bad porno movie to me.
Post by imojoebunny on Sept 2, 2015 21:24:16 GMT -5
Technically, no, Ms. Manner's would frown, but she would, also, give a dry clean only baby blanket (yes, I got one, and yes, they called my mother because I did not send a thank you note fast enough).