A race report of sorts/I need to ramble

[irene adler]

I can't figure out if I am justifiably pissed about yesterday's half or simply ungrateful.

Keep in mind, I was really undertrained for this race--I hit a really big training wall when I wiped out on my bike, and never really recovered. My plan: run whatever pace I felt like, stop and take pictures, enjoy racing alone, etc.

I have a cousin who is visiting CA--he was a marathon promoter for a few years, was one of the original marketing people for Rangar, etc. and is currently on a bike tour of national parks, so unbelievably fit. He decided to run part of the race with me. So I spent miles 1 - 5 running a faster pace than I planned, which killed me for the next very very hill 5 miles.

Mile 11 was a bit of a come to jesus mile (<--I tend to get a bit dramatic and question every life decision I've ever made), so when he rejoined me at about 11.5, I was in no mood to be teased, hear motivational things that only sounded like backhanded compliments, etc. I must have gotten at least-ed about 20 times (at least you can run! at least you didn't blow out a calf muscle like I did! At least you're not 50!)

I should be grateful that I have a family who came out to support me. But FFS, I just want to forget it ever happened because I felt like so much of a failure at the end. It was my slowest race ever.

Actual race report: Awesome course, very hilly from miles 6 - 10, beautiful views, small, and a great expo at the end of the race. I would definitely do it again.

[Wines Not Whines]

I think you should be mad at your cousin, not yourself! I'm sorry he messed up your groove. Congrats on your half! Which race was this?

[cinco]

Congrats on finishing your half marathon and not decking your cousin. Not all of us would be so nice.

[jene]

I would have punched him in the face. You did great!

[wambam]

Gross. I hate when people deviate from "You're doing great wambam! Keep it up!" <-- that's all I want to hear during a fitness endeavor. No at leasts, no telling me what to do, just that I'm awesome and to keep going.

[bostonmichelle]

Congrats on finishing! I'm sorry your cousin was being a meanie. I would not have been happy if someone messed with my pacing and then coming back in with at leasts, those make me want to punch people.

[ktzmoh]

Was this tiburon?

Here's the plan: be pissed at your cousin for being unhelpful and the. Run it again next year for redemption. I'll run with you next year and I promise I will not 'least' you and I will indulge the coming to Jesus moments.

Congrats on pushing through a really tough race. I think I've run most of that course before (if this was tiburon) and it's definitely challenging without the added complications of training trouble and a bike wreck.

[bg]

Definitely ok to be pissed at your cousin. Congrats on finishing!!

[irene adler]

It was in Tiburon! The views were awesome, and I definitely plan on running it again unless I decide to run Healdsburg next year

Keep in mind he genuinely did not intend to be mean. He's super into races and getting other people to enjoy running them as much as he does. Example: he thanked every single volunteer he saw, stopped to shake hands to thank people for coming out to cheer, and after crossing the finish line with me, he ran back to run with someone else he had met who was running her first half marathon to help cheer her on

It feels wrong to be pissed off at someone that upbeat and positive

[Brit]

That sucks that you had a bad experience. Try not to let it take away from your accomplishment. It can totally mess with you to keep pace with someone else during your race. At least you finished. ;-)

[Mushe]

Aw, I'm sorry for the good/bad combo! Your last line is cracking me up, though. I completely relate, and sometimes those relentlessly positive, upbeat people make me want to punch them. I'm sure he meant well, but 'at least'ing is the worst. I'm sorry the race was so hard, but yay for finishing! I bet it was gorgeous.

[irene adler]

Oct 5, 2015 12:36:03 GMT -5 Brit said:

At least you finished. ;-)

I see what you did there. A+

[Brit]

Oct 5, 2015 12:43:21 GMT -5 irene adler said:

Oct 5, 2015 12:36:03 GMT -5 Brit said:

At least you finished. ;-)

I see what you did there. A+

I was hoping you would see the humor. After I hit send I was like, 'um, what if she thinks I'm a total ass?'

[irene adler]

Oct 5, 2015 12:51:54 GMT -5 Brit said:

Oct 5, 2015 12:43:21 GMT -5 irene adler said:

I see what you did there. A+

I was hoping you would see the humor. After I hit send I was like, 'um, what if she thinks I'm a total ass?'

Lol. Never.

[sadlebred]

Congratulations on finishing! (dump the cousin for next year).....

[kams]

Two accomplishments! Finishing a half marathon and not killing him!

I'm sorry it was a tough day

[archaeominx]

I would have had a reallllly hard time not asking him to shut up. I had some totally random dude doing the same thing to me for about 4-5 miles during a race that was just not my day. Everything I could do to not puke and there's some perky full of energy fool dancing along beside me yelling out encouragement. NOOOOOOO.

[emilyinchile]

Oct 5, 2015 12:33:52 GMT -5 irene adler said:

It feels wrong to be pissed off at someone that upbeat and positive

Honestly, it's ok to be pissed off at this. People have different styles. There's a guy at my gym who is super motivational and really generous with his energy in terms of cheering for others but in a way that just doesn't always work for me. So sometimes I have to tell him to shut up, and luckily he gets it, and we can still be friends. If your cousin wouldn't shut up after you told him to stop, that's incredibly annoying. If you didn't tell him because you felt bad about being annoyed, then maybe there's a lesson for you that you have every right to ask people not to talk to you certain ways, even if those ways are objectively bad.

Either way, I'm sorry you had a less than great time, but "at least" the views were good!

[Deleted]

I HATE that kind of motivational shit while I'm running. I'm miserable, let me be miserable.

So, I applaud you for both finishing and not punching him.

[Deleted]

He should have kept his happy as at home. Jerk. That's why I like to run alone. Next time tell him to shut up so you can focus.

[keweenawlove]

I totally get being in a state of mine where you really don't want to hear that kind of thing. You'd think someone who's done as many races as your cousin would get wanting to just suck it up and get through a less than ideal race and move on.

[Susie]

Oct 5, 2015 11:34:27 GMT -5 irene adler said:

I must have gotten at least-ed about 20 times (at least you can run! at least you didn't blow out a calf muscle like I did! At least you're not 50!)

Man that fucking sucks.  I hate when people do that.

My MIL was doing it to me all afternoon yesterday, but instead of a race it was about my pregnancy (which I think she thinks is a competitive sport of suffering).  I am an uncomfortable 33 weeks and am having a difficult time controlling my gestational diabetes as perfectly as my doctors want.  I feel very deprived in terms of food.  Rather than anything remotely empathetic or encouraging, all she has to say is "it could be worse!" and "At least your baby doesn't/isn't ____ like Calvin did to me!"  

I wanted to hit her.  If you made it through all the "at least's" without decking your cousin,  (high5)

[thom]

I really love reading your perspective on this. It was an honest and real story. Some races are the suck for a variety of reasons, and everything is not always all happiness and PRs and sunshine. Of course I wish it would have went better for you, and I'm sorry your friend was driving you crazy. I hope your next race is awesome, and it will be just that much sweeter.

[shauni27]

Oct 5, 2015 12:36:03 GMT -5 Brit said:

That sucks that you had a bad experience. Try not to let it take away from your accomplishment. It can totally mess with you to keep pace with someone else during your race. At least you finished. ;-)

This is exactly what I was going to write.  Sometimes runs suck.  Sometimes races suck.  And that in general sucks and I'm sorry you had a shitty race :/  BUT!  You finished it and you should be proud of yourself no matter how long it took or how miserable it felt doing so.

[hannahb]

Ugh perky motivational sayings piss me off. I do better too with a good old "you look like shit, get your ass moving!"
Not all races go as planned. Way to tough it out.

[cole]

Congrats on finishing! Sorry your cousin was being a tool. At least you didn't punch him in the face

[hurricanedrunk]

Sorry you had a bad experience with your cousin, you handled it much more gracefully than I would have. Congrats on finishing!

[wanderlustmom]

You did great and I don't like that style of compliments either. He sounds like a nice guy otherwise but I don't blame you and I wouldn't like those comments

[PatBenatar]

Congrats on finishing and not punching your cousin in the face!

[mrs.jacinthe]

I'm sorry. That's the worst.

Next time, let me know, I'll come cheer for you - but I won't even try to run with you, lol.