Poll: hostile work environments

[lurknomore]

My local radio station shared the results of a survey about hostile work environments this morning and the number of people who felt they work in a hostile work environment was shockingly high. Apparently 88% of people would rather work elsewhere because they feel that their work environment is hostile. I know we've had some doozies, but I never would have guessed 88% of people feel they are currently in a hostile work environment.

So MM, do you feel your CURRENT work environment is hostile (defined however you want) is hostile? If you're not currently employed, answer for your most recent employment. Poll answers: yes or no. No SS. And of course, share your best stories below!

[iammalcolmx]

I work in HR, I wish a Mofo would.........

[CrazyLucky]

My work environment now is great. When I worked at IBM, it sucked. If you left at 5, you were sure to get at least two people saying something like, "Taking a half day, huh?" I did leave at five. I left because I had a life and I played sports and did stuff, but the reason is unimportant. My boss called me in and told me that I was like a Yugo to his Cadillac, because he stayed there late every day and I left at 5 every day, "For what? To spend time with your FAMILY? There are days I don't even see my son." That's just one example. He told me if I hated working for him so much to find another department. I did, and then he told me he wouldn't let me transfer and wouldn't give me a date when I could leave. The stress of that job was messing with my health, so I found a new one. My boss's boss asked me why I wanted to leave, and I told him the Yugo thing. The boss's boss was like, "So?"

[Deleted]

Yessssss. Boss Lady, is all I have to say, Boss Lady.
But! Only 4 more days on the office. And! She's out next week, so today is the last day I ever have to see her!

[Deleted]

I am not now, but in my previous job last year I was (remember stories of me working for the "crazy Dean?").

I was an executive assistant to a university Dean. She was verbally abusive (personal insults), would literally scream over things like the coffee pot being out of coffee, would call people at home late at night and scream/swear/threaten their jobs, would regularly change policies (Monday you were told one thing, Tuesday you were told the opposite, and Wednesday you were screamed at for following Tuesday's plan and not Monday's), she would gossip and pit the staff against each other....it was insane.

Long story short I was asked to resign only a few days after she took me to lunch and promised a "clean slate and fresh start."

I am in a MUCH better place now, and am actually using my degree so I not only have a better work environment but I have a better career now too. Getting fired was a blessing in disguise, but that was very hard to see at the time. Part of me does however wish I was still working at the university in some capacity.

[Deleted]

I am. Im in manufacturing and people use that as an excuse to be dicks to each other all the time. The production manager regually yells at everyone and gets his business into things that arent his responsibility. Im currently pregnant and not feeling like looking for a job but will probably start looking after I come back from leave. I have stayed 2 years so far because i figured out how to stay off the radar and I wanted some experience with this title. I also go home at a normal time each day so it works for my life. I hate being here for the most part though and dont understand how the business keeps going.

[jinkies]

Not hostile, just inept.

However, this was largely because my boss shielded me and my coworker from the rants of *her* boss.

I would say that my boss worked in a hostile environment.

Thankfully, I'm currently enjoying a few weeks off before starting a new job. It's a very small company with very low turnover, and I really liked everyone I've met so far, so I have high hopes.

[explorer2001]

Currently, I'm in the best place I've ever worked and love it.

Before this, hostile might not cover it - flat out abusive is more accurate. Examples abound so this isnt everything.
Getting told I looked "retarded" when I came back to the office after an emergency root canal to handle a conference call.
Regularly being screamed at about why a project I had never heard of wasn't done and being expected to turn it around in 24 hours.
Being told my friend was dead already and wouldn't know if I was at his funeral or not and I could not have the time off to go. I told boss to fire me when I got back if he really felt that way and went.
Being told about how I would/should be subject to bride burning/honor killing for divorcing my ex for abuse and adultery because that's how it is where he came from. Plus a ton of other misogynistic bull every day. Women don't belong in careers etc but he couldn't run his business without me.
Working 7 days a week for months straight.
Boss offering to make me a partner so he could use my credit to fund his business and life style. I had wised up and refused. He actually said he needed me to sign off on some business loans because his credit wasn't good enough and I refused.
Bounded and late paychecks. Years of lies about when I would get benefits.
Constant comments about how my ex should have taught me better and kept me in line but I was one of those damned independent women. Comments about my budget, why I needed a fancier car to impress clients, which I couldn't afford on what I was being paid.
Boss trying to set things up so he could pin fraud on me and trying to manipulate me into signing off on the fraudulent documents even after I caught it and challenged him on it.
I quit and in a much better place.

[steamboat185]

No currently, but with a previous employer. My coworkers got HR because my boss was screaming at me so loudly in a conference room they were afraid she was going to hit me. People would just stand up and walk out never to comeback. It was awful.

[shamrockshake]

Not now, but with my last boss, omg yes. I have told stories on here before. He used to walk past me and throw his trash at me, refused to speak to me- emailed me anything he needed, despite the fact that we worked less than 10 feet apart. It culminated him in throwing a stapler at my head, hard enough that it put a hole in wall about 6" to my right

I used to cry about having to go to work in the morning, there were only 3 of us in the office and the third (big boss) traveled a lot, so I had many days alone with him.

[mbcdefg]

I like my current job very much. The CEO has eliminated a lot of the office perks and seems confused as to why people don't want to happily work beyond regular office hours, but whatever. My manager is really nice and I like my coworkers. 

I've liked most jobs I've had, actually, except one. I was hired to work for a magazine and started on the same day as another young woman around my age (C) doing the same job. Our manager was nice enough during the first week but that was about it. I got exactly one compliment from her during my time there. The rest of the time it was dirty looks, and nasty emails even though she sat right next to me. She almost never talked to me unless she was berating me for something that, 99% of the time, had nothing to do with me. I said good morning to her every day but she would just sneer at me and not say anything in return. C dealt with the same thing. The manager's subordinate soon got really nasty with us for no reason, too. C and I quickly became friends because we had lunch together every day (we always took our lunches once the manager returned from hers, to maximize our time away from her) and wondered WTF the manager's problem was. We would ask Manager and Subordinate questions about the work and they'd yell at us that we should know it already, so then we'd avoid asking questions after that and then they'd yell at us that we needed to ask questions instead of screwing things up.

Other coworkers sort of told us in coded language that our manager was a huge bitch who always drove employees out, and the manager's boss was basically a lunatic. I drove home every day crying because I just couldn't understand why Manager and the Subordinate were so mean. 

We'd worked there a couple months when the manager told us we could come in a couple hours late the next day ... when I came in C's jacket was at her desk but she wasn't there. Manager pulled me into an office and said that "it's not working out" and began to weep hysterically and say how much she liked me and enjoyed getting to know me. Again, remember that she never said two nice words to me, so I was just sitting there like this while she bawled her eyes out at how much she loved me:




She said I didn't have to leave that day ... I could stay there until I was replaced or until I found something else. In retrospect I wish I'd told her to go fuck herself and quit, but I needed the health insurance and rent money so I decided to stay as long as I could. I went outside to regroup and called C to tell her what happened, and C said the same thing happened to her and she'd gone home to regroup as well. C and I heard through the grapevine that the Manager and her department were getting blamed by Psycho Boss for something, so Manager threw me and C under the bus to save herself, and it wasn't the first time she'd done that to an employee. We stayed another week and then the Manager sent us an email (she hit Send just as she was leaving the office - she left in mid-afternoon every day for her kids) saying that we had to be out by Friday - the tearful meeting the week before was basically the last time I actually spoke to her. She sent another email, as she was leaving, on that last day to tell us how much she liked us and how great we were. Whatever, bitch. C and I filed for unemployment, and then C's was denied because the company told Unemployment that she'd quit on her own accord so she had to jump through hoops to get her money. 

[drloretta]

My current work environment is awesome, but my last job was the epitome of hostile. It messed with my head for months. Their attitude was, "We think you suck, and you'll have to prove that you're any good. But we'll torpedo you at every opportunity."

[partiallysunny]

Two years ago I did. Now I do not.

[dr.girlfriend]

My graduate school environment was so completely hostile (like, driving students to suicide hostile) that ever since then, my number one criteria in choosing a place is the environment and people. I've never regretted it for an instant, and in retrospect I'm glad I learned that lesson fairly early on in life.

I'm guessing this radio "survey" was like, "Call in and tell us if your work environment is hostile or not?" and then the people in bad work environments were tearing up the phone lines, lol. Selection bias FTW!

[agnes]

2 companies/5 years ago, I did. Towards the end, I cried almost every day at work. I still get anxiety thinking about Evil Boss Lady. Let's just leave it at that.

[lurknomore]

Oct 6, 2015 9:46:11 GMT -5 dr.girlfriend said:

My graduate school environment was so completely hostile (like, driving students to suicide hostile) that ever since then, my number one criteria in choosing a place is the environment and people. I've never regretted it for an instant, and in retrospect I'm glad I learned that lesson fairly early on in life.

I'm guessing this radio "survey" was like, "Call in and tell us if your work environment is hostile or not?" and then the people in bad work environments were tearing up the phone lines, lol. Selection bias FTW!

No!  It was a survey that they found published somewhere and then were discussing.  But, yes, they then did have people calling in to share their daily grievances.  Someone who called had a good point...There's not that much workplace hostility but there are a lot of dramatic workers out there. 

I'm lucky to never have been in a place that was outright hostile, even grad school.  I can't imagine that 88% of people are really truly that unhappy at their jobs. 

[dragon's breath]

I just escaped one two and a half weeks ago. It was so bad, I was looking at "commuting" five hours every weekend (single mom with a teen son, a senior). I was sexually harassed, and when I was able to provide proof (multiple text messages asking for sex, and when I said no, my job assignments were obviously changed and I had witnesses to a verbal attack by my harasser). When management did their "investigation", they decided that me keeping the text messages and presenting them as my proof "showed (my) vengeful spirit". Seriously, WTF?

They had people intentionally violating safety procedures in the hope that I would not catch the "mistakes", leading me to accept something in the wrong state, and then they could fire me because it was my responsibility to verify those points, etc.

I asked a supervisor to borrow his pickup, and my old supervisor tried to report me for "disrupting the workplace environment", because the hallway echos and he could hear me. They couldn't find anything real to fire me over, so they kept trying to make things up, set me up to fail, etc. I'm lucky I got out when I did! Not only could I have gotten hurt with some of the things they were doing (I was an electrician, really easy to set up an "accident" if you want), but they could have killed me or someone relying on me to keep them safe.

Two weeks out of this environment and I've lost five pounds, all the stress, and am smiling at work again.

[atarianna]

I once worked in an incredibly hostile work environment. Ironically it was for an HR department.

The personnel manager (just below the director) was straight up evil. She outwardly demeaned employees in the front office (reception) in front of others. There was 90 day probation and she would keep receptionists for 89 days then fire them because she didn't need just cause. Once she was incredibly rude and demeaning towards a woman in front of other non-HR employees and I reported her to the director. Then I became a target.

Receptionist 1 was fired, then receptionist 2 fell ill so I had to fill in up front in addition to my responsibilities. I was there less than 6 months and would come home crying daily. I couldn't sleep and was so anxious going to work every morning that I would be fired.

So I left there making a little more than minimum wage and got another job at 3x the pay.

[Velvetshady]

I have twice had projects where I'd consider the environment as hostile. The first, I was able to work through, adjust expectations, and the core group eventually became a very happy, high functioning team. The second, the person causing it was doing it on purpose, had no interest in changing/adjusting, and after it was proven it wasn't just a me/her thing, she no longer is employed here. Both, I would have quit in a blaze of glory if I didn't need health ins.

These both were times when I was crying at work and home daily, I was doubting my ability to function, I was swinging between depression and anger on a dime, and other people were shocked by the treatment I was getting. I don't include the time early in my career when I was given the advice to wear shorter skirts if I wanted the bosses boss to listen to me (I won him over without following that advice btw.)

[v]

Oct 6, 2015 10:58:36 GMT -5 jenny1980 said:

It drives me nuts that "hostile work environment" is used simply to describe a bad working climate vs. what it actually means legally.

I'm with you. I opened this thread expecting things like "after a friend/colleague reported pretty vicious sexual harassment, she was retaliated against and eventually forced out" (that would describe two close friends from my first firm...).

Not the run of the mill "my boss is a jackass" stuff.

[WOT?*]

Abusive, yes. Discriminatory, yes. Hostile, not by the definition.

My last place, the new managing lead attorney managed to get people to leave that had been happily employed by the company for 8-15 years and was just a miserable person to work for. I was having stress-related heart problems before year 2. I was finally put in a "quit or be fired" position and I made them fire me; the last person that quit had her UE challenged and lost. I wasn't planning on returning to work any time soon (this was when the girls were first placed with me. I had legal protections up the wazoo that weren't in place and they knew it) so I wasn't worried about the ramifications of termination.  One of the attorneys was so stressed that after any meeting with her, he would have to call his doctor's office to have his heart monitored; another had to take leave because she had a mental break in her office and had to be taken home sobbing (she ended up retiring shortly thereafter); two top performers left because they didn't want or need to take her crap and other positions opened elsewhere. Even her "favorite" at the time I was there is gone because after there was nobody else left to target, she had to take aim at someone. It was just how she managed and what she thought the expectations were from above. It soured me on working for large corporations for a very long time.

I did have a job back in my late 20s that came close. I was a victim of the rumor mill as one of the few women employed on the floor (an ADH was saying he slept with me, another boss propositioning me and asking for naked back rubs, another walking me to my car to talk about why I wasn't getting promoted "as a woman you just have to be more perfect than the guys..." Well meaning, but discriminatory - and I was a lot better at his job than he was at mine to begin with. When he hired a guy as his ADH instead of me because "guys shouldn't be in customer service..." that was just another day in the life.)

[Velvetshady]

Oct 6, 2015 7:24:10 GMT -5 CrazyLucky said:

My work environment now is great. When I worked at IBM, it sucked. If you left at 5, you were sure to get at least two people saying something like, "Taking a half day, huh?" I did leave at five. I left because I had a life and I played sports and did stuff, but the reason is unimportant. My boss called me in and told me that I was like a Yugo to his Cadillac, because he stayed there late every day and I left at 5 every day, "For what? To spend time with your FAMILY? There are days I don't even see my son." That's just one example. He told me if I hated working for him so much to find another department. I did, and then he told me he wouldn't let me transfer and wouldn't give me a date when I could leave. The stress of that job was messing with my health, so I found a new one. My boss's boss asked me why I wanted to leave, and I told him the Yugo thing. The boss's boss was like, "So?"

If this is a "hostile work environment", I could claim every single work day for the last 20 years.

[Deleted]

I think mine meets the definition of hostile. I've had two coworkers report some type of unethical behavior and instead of the issue being addressed, they were put on performance improvement plans for not being politically savvy enough to look the other way when a government official did something (or in the other case, didn't do something) that the organization's regulations required.

Word to the wise;l: anytime someone wags the "I have to do this because I'm an ethical person" flag, they're actually a lying sack of shit.

[Wanderista]

I'm happy to be in a non-hostile environment.

[sparkythelawyer]

Oct 6, 2015 10:19:34 GMT -5 dragon's breath said:

I just escaped one two and a half weeks ago. It was so bad, I was looking at "commuting" five hours every weekend (single mom with a teen son, a senior). I was sexually harassed, and when I was able to provide proof (multiple text messages asking for sex, and when I said no, my job assignments were obviously changed and I had witnesses to a verbal attack by my harasser). When management did their "investigation", they decided that me keeping the text messages and presenting them as my proof "showed (my) vengeful spirit". Seriously, WTF?

They had people intentionally violating safety procedures in the hope that I would not catch the "mistakes", leading me to accept something in the wrong state, and then they could fire me because it was my responsibility to verify those points, etc.

I asked a supervisor to borrow his pickup, and my old supervisor tried to report me for "disrupting the workplace environment", because the hallway echos and he could hear me. They couldn't find anything real to fire me over, so they kept trying to make things up, set me up to fail, etc. I'm lucky I got out when I did! Not only could I have gotten hurt with some of the things they were doing (I was an electrician, really easy to set up an "accident" if you want), but they could have killed me or someone relying on me to keep them safe.

Two weeks out of this environment and I've lost five pounds, all the stress, and am smiling at work again.

www.eeoc.gov.

Seriously. Geezus.

[VillainV]

I have been in a hostile work environment. I'm not anymore. But my job changes every few years or so, so at least if I find myself in a bad workplace, I know that I won't be there forever. I don't know that I would have quit my job when I was in the hostile environment, so I can see how people would stay anyway.

[dragon's breath]

Oct 6, 2015 14:17:17 GMT -5 sparkythelawyer said:

Oct 6, 2015 10:19:34 GMT -5 dragon's breath said:

I just escaped one two and a half weeks ago. It was so bad, I was looking at "commuting" five hours every weekend (single mom with a teen son, a senior). I was sexually harassed, and when I was able to provide proof (multiple text messages asking for sex, and when I said no, my job assignments were obviously changed and I had witnesses to a verbal attack by my harasser). When management did their "investigation", they decided that me keeping the text messages and presenting them as my proof "showed (my) vengeful spirit". Seriously, WTF?

They had people intentionally violating safety procedures in the hope that I would not catch the "mistakes", leading me to accept something in the wrong state, and then they could fire me because it was my responsibility to verify those points, etc.

I asked a supervisor to borrow his pickup, and my old supervisor tried to report me for "disrupting the workplace environment", because the hallway echos and he could hear me. They couldn't find anything real to fire me over, so they kept trying to make things up, set me up to fail, etc. I'm lucky I got out when I did! Not only could I have gotten hurt with some of the things they were doing (I was an electrician, really easy to set up an "accident" if you want), but they could have killed me or someone relying on me to keep them safe.

Two weeks out of this environment and I've lost five pounds, all the stress, and am smiling at work again.

www.eeoc.gov.

Seriously. Geezus.

I started that route, and it was pure hell.  Finally settled when the EEOC investigator got involved, which is how I managed to escape.  If I hadn't been able to get the settlement, I'd still be stuck in that nightmare, fighting management tooth and nail.

ETA: I had a lawyer on standby and was so ready to go in for the hearing.  I got what I wanted job-wise in the settlement, but really wanted them to pay for how they handled it.  In the end, they did demote the main harasser, but he is fighting it through the union. 

ETA again...: I had years worth of documentation (most started 2007, some was even previous to that).  I had a 2" binder filled with my documentation + copies of text messages, and management still retaliated and tried to punish anyone who talked to me.  It was insane.  Honestly, with the documentation (and proof) that I had, there were three people who should have been fired for doing it or condoning it, but that's the government for you, they are really good at covering for people.

[sparkythelawyer]

Oct 6, 2015 15:56:02 GMT -5 dragon's breath said:

Glad you got out, and that you did something about it.  What a nightmare for you, I'm glad you triumphed over it :-)

[dragon's breath]

Oct 6, 2015 14:33:04 GMT -5 VillainV said:

I have been in a hostile work environment. I'm not anymore. But my job changes every few years or so, so at least if I find myself in a bad workplace, I know that I won't be there forever. I don't know that I would have quit my job when I was in the hostile environment, so I can see how people would stay anyway.

I know why I stayed... Single mom, mortgage, parents with failing health making me feel I need to stay in the area.  Little job prospect for same income, "blackballed" once I reported the harassment.  I had the countdown to my son graduating and going on his own so that I could take drastic measures to escape (selling house, taking any job that provided healthcare, etc).  Fortunately I escaped before it came to that.  But, when they know you're trapped, they get even more abusive.

I was miserable, and it was destroying my health, but I was doing what I needed to to provide for my son.  No one should ever have to be in that position, but it happens all the time.

[dragon's breath]

Oct 6, 2015 16:04:11 GMT -5 sparkythelawyer said:

Oct 6, 2015 15:56:02 GMT -5 dragon's breath said:

Glad you got out, and that you did something about it.  What a nightmare for you, I'm glad you triumphed over it :-)

What made me more upset than almost anything was that they were going to send the abuser to the location I asked to transfer to.  Not only would it make the transfer impossible (which I really wanted since new job location is in my hometown), but there were three women on the crews at the new location that he would eventually harass.  I called the three women to warn the them when I found out about management's intentions.  (One of those women had just finished a seven year EEOC battle fighting her own harasser and "the system".)

Luckily, the union, my claim, and other things happened to prevent management from transferring the guy.  

I'm so thankful I pursued it, even though reporting it was not a good experience.