Hugs carrots, DH and i used to go through phases like that. Can you get away for a few days together? Or maybe just go on a day hike or for a walk together? We always were able to reconnect that way. Especially the walking. It was weird, but we'd always have these amazing conversations when we were moving vs. just sitting down looking at each other.
I am so very sorry you're struggling. That is an awful lot to take in, and the pressure of declutter shit is real.
I promise I mean this more gently than it probably sounds, but you said you've jumped from relationship to relationship. Do you think that is a desire for companionship or just that you need excitement? Either way, I think definitely that therapy can help you explore that and I'm glad you're getting help.
I am sorry you are going through a hard time. When I'm feeling down and out of sorts, I am really bad about picking apart everything in my life. Like I start looking for problems where there aren't any and it makes everything so much worse. I hope getting into a therapist helps. Big hugs.
Post by whitemerlot on Nov 25, 2015 18:42:02 GMT -5
My h used to travel a lot before we had kids and it was always hard to have him come back and invade my space. He also used to work in an industry with a crazy busy season and then slow time and every year he was just so annoying until I was used to him being around again. We've been married a long time and have had some ups and downs. Try to find a way to reconnect. Can you do a weekend away or nice date?
Take a couple of deep breaths, carrots. It took a lot of mental oomph to type all that and to say it out loud. Good for you.
You have taken some good steps to further strengthen yourself: calling a therapist, dialing it back with the co-worker, letting some vulnerabilities out.
I don't always think this is a safe place here but I think there are a good number of very safe people here. Chronic pain and chronic illness take a toll. It's hard to be hurting. I am sorry you are hurting. If I can help you in any way just let me know.
I'm sorry, Carrots. Chronic health issues take such a huge toll, especially when pain is involved, because your brain interprets the pain as a danger signal and eventually it's like being under siege for months and this turns into depression. This is how my neurologist explained it to me, anyway.
I am so sorry. It must be so overwhelming to feel like things are coming at you from all directions like that. I am really glad you are going to talk to someone <3
I am so very sorry you're struggling. That is an awful lot to take in, and the pressure of declutter shit is real.
I promise I mean this more gently than it probably sounds, but you said you've jumped from relationship to relationship. Do you think that is a desire for companionship or just that you need excitement? Either way, I think definitely that therapy can help you explore that and I'm glad you're getting help.
Big hugs, carrots.
I absolutely understand. I'm just so sorry that you're sick and struggling. I wish you nothing but the very best.
Post by scottyderp on Nov 25, 2015 20:47:53 GMT -5
There's nothing wrong with you. Lyme is nuts. The controversy surrounding Lyme is stressful. Relationships are stressful. Work is stressful.
It is SO normal to feel like nothing makes sense anymore. This is going to sound stupid, but, sometimes you just need to take it an hour at a time. A day at a time. Do your best, and let yourself be a wreck sometimes. You're fighting a war inside, and you need to focus on YOU. If your H can't be there for you, he can't. But, you need to put yourself at #1, always. Whatever that takes.
I so get it. You are not alone. Hang on for the good days, you know you will have them.
Post by scottyderp on Nov 25, 2015 20:52:17 GMT -5
Also, I've seen three Lyme docs between two states (had new ones when I moved) and they ALL say that during a full moon (currently), Lyme activity peaks. I find that my neuropathy is worse.
Big hugs. Please be kind to yourself. Don't apologize for sharing with the board. There are lots and LOTS of women here who genuinely care about each other (INCLUDING YOU!)...and only a very few who may use something in a later discussion.
It sounds like your marriage is good overall, just in a really rough spot right now. That's totally normal for ALL marriages. Your willingness to work on yourself and your marriage says a lot.
Sending more hugs. I hope you're able to find a professional soon who can really help you. But in the meantime, it's good to be able to get things off of your chest.
Also, I've seen three Lyme docs between two states (had new ones when I moved) and they ALL say that during a full moon (currently), Lyme activity peaks. I find that my neuropathy is worse.
I also find this to be true. I also think mepron makes me manic. But it's the only way to get rid of babesia. So my LLMD took me off some other abx for now to see if I level off. I seriously wanted to hug her on Monday when I saw her and understood me.
I have lots to say, but on my phone. Short version- big hugs. Lyme sucks. Being a caretaker is a tough position to be in, it is challenging and exhausting. I wish you were closer, I would love to have a drink or 2 with you and talk.