Vent. Neighbors!

[Deleted]

We have not moved to our new house but it seems like we're already the talk of the neighborhood. I can't believe I'll be neighbors with crazies! Uggh!

We're on our 10th month of construction. Two homes were also under construction in that period but they finished faster than we did. Now we're the only one left to finish. We got the last empty lot in the neighborhood. This is an upscale neighborhood with very strict HOA.

Neighbor A complained to us before about the hole on the side of our house. We have a hole since we have a basement and we were not ready to backfill. He mentioned his kids's safety. I thought why would the kids be playing on a narrow space between 2 homes, why not at their backyard and why aren't they being watched? Fine, we'll backfill as soon as it's possible. I don't remember his exact words but I, H and our builder didn't like the way he communicated his request. He was somewhat up in our faces.

One day I found out from our builder that neighbor A has been accusing our site foreman for killing the trees in his yard. What??? The trees his builder planted were all dying. Now it's our fault that his trees are dead?

Then a couple months ago, we noticed neighbor A's dead trees piled up at our backyard. How disrespectful! But we did not say anything since we're not done grading anyway. The workers will just toss those when they level our yard.

Last week, we were reviewing grading and tried to put up a line for the property line so we can have a better idea on the grading. Ummm... we couldn't get to the survey pin because neighbor A stockpiled his junk on top of the pin. My gosh! I really have no idea what's wrong with this neighbor!

I contacted HOA and asked if there's a way thy can find out who owns the pile of trash at the property corner. If nobody owns it, we'll clear it out since it's covering the survey pin, an eyesore and affecting the drain easement.

Two days later, we went to visit the house. I saw the neighbor A sitting at his front porch. I waved and smiled. He just nodded with a serious look. Doesn't look neighborly to me. Oh well! When we got to the back of our house,we saw that the pile of junk has been moved to neighbor A's backyard including the pile of dead trees. LOL.

Then 2 days ago, H got an email from another neighbor who works at the same company as H. H called him and neighbor B wanted to let us know how our construction is affecting the neighborhood. Here's their list:

A. Porter potty at the front... (fine we'll move this to the back)
B. The dumpster is not parallel to the street... (builder said they will remove when it's full)
C. Neighbors speculating we cut a neighbor's cable... (builder said they did accidentally cut it and reported to cable company ASAP. But he said cable company is liable to fix it)

I thought everything was cool. Then H got another email from neighbor B that really annoys me. It seems B is expecting us to visit the next door neighbors after we move in and ask for concerns and damages our house have caused or is causing. WTF! I don't even know what to say!!

He also wrote that we worn out our welcome because of the 3 items above and the construction taking long. What?!?! These people don't sound reasonable at all. On the length, we're within HOA rules.

He also added that we have great neighbors but action speaks louder than words. I have no idea what he's trying to imply. But it sounds to me like he's accusing us of something.

So, any thoughts and comments on how to deal with these neighbors? Are we the douchebags here?

Please don't quote. I will DD. I definitely feel better now after typing all that up.

[puppiesandrainbows]

Your neighbors sound like psychos. Like you built your house for the express purpose of ruining their lives. WTF. I would make sure you get your yard fenced in so you don't have to smile and wave at the douchey neighbor while you BBQ.

[7costanza]

I don't see how any of those complaints are your fault, or problem. They knew they were moving into a neighborhood with unfinished houses, right? I would just ignore the latest email, and continue to be friendly when you see people.

[mollybrown]

How odd! Were their homes built by the same builder? Did you buy a lot and handle the construction yourself, or does the builder "own" the whole neighborhood? It seems bizarre that the builder is even passing their complaints on to you. Most of this seems like the builder's problem, not yours. I would direct your H's co-worker to the builder as well.

I'm in the process of building a house too, and I have absolutely no control over the things they are complaining about.

[Deleted]

I don't understand why these are your problems oo that they are holding it against you. They should address their concerns to the builder.

[bronxgirl]

Ypur neighbors are assholes. I'm sorry you're going through that.

[Deleted]

Aug 28, 2012 21:49:29 GMT -5 puppiesandrainbows said:

Your neighbors sound like psychos. Like you built your house for the express purpose of ruining their lives. WTF. I would make sure you get your yard fenced in so you don't have to smile and wave at the douchey neighbor while you BBQ.

We're going to fence, but the fence will not be a privacy fence. I'll ask HOA to see if they have any approved list of things we can use to put up right by the fence to block our open patio from the neighbor.

Aug 28, 2012 22:03:06 GMT -5 7costanza said:

I don't see how any of those complaints are your fault, or problem. They knew they were moving into a neighborhood with unfinished houses, right? I would just ignore the latest email, and continue to be friendly when you see people.

Most of the homes there were built in the 90s. The 3 homes constructed this year are on the last 3 lots. Neighbor A lives in one of these homes.

I told H there's no way I'm going to go ask the neighbors after we move how our construction damaged their homes. That's one crazy expectation from neighbor B!

Aug 28, 2012 22:05:42 GMT -5 mollybrown said:

How odd! Were their homes built by the same builder? Did you buy a lot and handle the construction yourself, or does the builder "own" the whole neighborhood? It seems bizarre that the builder is even passing their complaints on to you. Most of this seems like the builder's problem, not yours. I would direct your H's co-worker to the builder as well.

I'm in the process of building a house too, and I have absolutely no control over the things they are complaining about.

The ones built in the 90s and neighbor A's house were all built by the same builder. We bought the lot and chose a different builder to build our custom house. Maybe they are complaining directly to us since everything is in our names? The other 2 homes built this year were in the builder's name until the houses were done.

Aug 28, 2012 22:06:23 GMT -5 @missy1 said:

I don't understand why these are your problems oo that they are holding it against you. They should address their concerns to the builder.

Yeah, I definitely can't understand why they are holding all these against us. I have a feeling the other neighbors don't really have any problem with us, just neighbor A who probably complained to B or to everyone. Who knows! I definitely have no respect to B anymore. I can't believe a senior VP (who I would expect to be a reasonable person) would say all those things, in a company email no less.

[EmilieMadison]

Sounds like the neighbors were enjoying the extra space your lot provided (almost as an extension of their own yards for playing and storing their shit) and are pissed that they can't use it anymore. That's NOT YOUR FAULT. Its your lot, and you're building a house. Whatever affect it's had on them seems perfectly reasonable, considering the circumstances of, you know, having a house built next door.

When you move in, I would continue to smile and wave and make polite conversation if you see them, but do not respond to their emails or their complaints. That's just ridiculous.

[Balki.Bartokomous]

I'd just ignore everything. If you get a warning from the HOA or something, then respond, obviously, but otherwise do not engage.

[aurora]

Some people just get a high out of being disgruntled. I am sorry you are dealing with that. And, I cannot believe they would complain that the dumpster is not parallel with the street!*

*I am assuming it is not blocking the entire road, since you seem like a reasonable person who would have mentioned that.

[Deleted]

Aug 28, 2012 22:32:34 GMT -5 aurora said:

Some people just get a high out of being disgruntled. I am sorry you are dealing with that. And, I cannot believe they would complain that the dumpster is not parallel with the street!*

*I am assuming it is not blocking the entire road, since you seem like a reasonable person who would have mentioned that.

The dumpster is completely inside the construction area; not passed the curb or anything. My builder have also been very careful on not getting mud on the street. It's not on the HOA rules or anything but builder wants to be neighborly. The other 2 builders who built this year actually didn't even care about the mud they were causing on the street.

[FrozenSunshine]

Nothing like a warm welcome to the neighborhood. I vote ignore and continue on, unless you hear from the HOA. Most people don't like change.

[slug*bug]

My first thought was similar to emilie's: I think Neighbor A had gotten used to viewing your lot as their space and the change is uncomfortable and unpleasant.

Assuming that he had a chance to buy your lot when it was on the market, his grumptastic response to your build is completely of his own making.

Sorry you're dealing with such a crap welcome to the neighborhood.

[dochas]

To play devil's advocate - people who like strict HOAs like to have everything just so. And don't want to live next door to a hole in the ground for a year. I wouldn't have sent you a letter or said any of those things, but how happy would you be living next to a never ending construction project that may or may not have a sloppy foreman?

[aspentosh]

If you buy a house with an open lot next to you, you need to realize there will be a house built there. Tomorrow or a few years down the road. Also, a house doesn't go up in a week so he should expect the construction to be there for an extended period of time. It sounds like you and the builder are being as courteous as possible.

Agree to leave it alone and not engage.

[dochas]

Just to add - my sister lived next to a nightmare construction project. The police even had to be called. But after the owners moved in and time passed they became good friends. Once you are in and some time goes by the normal people should see that you are good people. I'd definitely get whatever privacy you can between you and the nut next to you though.

[6fsn]

I know someone that sent fruit baskets to the neighbors as a "sorry for the construction." It's completely unnecessary, but she said it do go a long way to smoothing the move.

[lys]

Sorry you are having a tough time with neighbor complaints.
My question is why has it taken 10 months to build your home? It does not sound like you are doing the construction yourself. Typical time frame from start (digging hole for basement) to move in for our area is 14-16 weeks for a custom build.

[Deleted]

Aug 28, 2012 22:30:23 GMT -5 EmilieMadison said:

Sounds like the neighbors were enjoying the extra space your lot provided (almost as an extension of their own yards for playing and storing their shit) and are pissed that they can't use it anymore. That's NOT YOUR FAULT. Its your lot, and you're building a house. Whatever affect it's had on them seems perfectly reasonable, considering the circumstances of, you know, having a house built next door.

When you move in, I would continue to smile and wave and make polite conversation if you see them, but do not respond to their emails or their complaints. That's just ridiculous.

Thanks for the recommendation on how to deal with these neighbors. We'll try our best not to engage. I just hope they won't stop us one day to discuss their issues/complaints because I may not be able to control myself and will say something not nice. lol.

Aug 28, 2012 22:32:25 GMT -5 Balki.Bartokomous said:

I'd just ignore everything. If you get a warning from the HOA or something, then respond, obviously, but otherwise do not engage.

Sounds good. We'll try our best.

Aug 29, 2012 6:56:51 GMT -5 dochas said:

To play devil's advocate - people who like strict HOAs like to have everything just so. And don't want to live next door to a hole in the ground for a year. I wouldn't have sent you a letter or said any of those things, but how happy would you be living next to a never ending construction project that may or may not have a sloppy foreman?

Just to clarify, the hole in question is the "over dig" to install the basement walls. It's about a couple feet from the finished basement wall that doesn't get back filled with dirt/gravel until waterproofing is completed. We back filled around the house within 3-4mos, not 1yr.

Aug 29, 2012 7:07:19 GMT -5 aspentosh said:

If you buy a house with an open lot next to you, you need to realize there will be a house built there. Tomorrow or a few years down the road. Also, a house doesn't go up in a week so he should expect the construction to be there for an extended period of time. It sounds like you and the builder are being as courteous as possible.

Agree to leave it alone and not engage.

The funny thing is this neighbor A also went through the building process with their house last year.

Aug 29, 2012 7:38:59 GMT -5 6fsn said:

I know someone that sent fruit baskets to the neighbors as a "sorry for the construction." It's completely unnecessary, but she said it do go a long way to smoothing the move.

I don't think I'll be able to get myself to do that. LOL. But we'll see. I can see H liking this idea.

[Pom]

Good luck. I agree with the do not engage sentiment. They sound like a bunch of busy bodies who want their asses kissed.

[Deleted]

Aug 29, 2012 9:02:21 GMT -5 lys said:

Sorry you are having a tough time with neighbor complaints.
My question is why has it taken 10 months to build your home? It does not sound like you are doing the construction yourself. Typical time frame from start (digging hole for basement) to move in for our area is 14-16 weeks.

It's a custom house with a 2300 sq ft full basement, 3700 sq ft finished 1st/2nd floors. I've seen custom homes taking more than a year which I believe is very typical.

[stingsharkruns]

Aug 29, 2012 9:05:44 GMT -5 d0ri said:

Aug 29, 2012 9:02:21 GMT -5 lys said:

Sorry you are having a tough time with neighbor complaints.
My question is why has it taken 10 months to build your home? It does not sound like you are doing the construction yourself. Typical time frame from start (digging hole for basement) to move in for our area is 14-16 weeks.

It's a custom house with a 2300 sq ft full basement, 3700 sq ft finished 1st/2nd floors. I've seen custom homes taking more than a year which I believe is very typical.

My Dad is a contractor. He just built a custom home that took around 14mths. The house was around 8000sqft

[cosmowife]

Aug 29, 2012 9:02:21 GMT -5 lys said:

Sorry you are having a tough time with neighbor complaints.
My question is why has it taken 10 months to build your home? It does not sound like you are doing the construction yourself. Typical time frame from start (digging hole for basement) to move in for our area is 14-16 weeks for a custom build.

Wow, I would not be comfortable knowing that my house was thrown together that quickly. It took us almost a year just to renovate a nearly 4000sf house.

[Deleted]

Aug 29, 2012 9:49:13 GMT -5 cosmowife said:

[Wow, I would not be comfortable knowing that my house was thrown together that quickly. It took us almost a year just to renovate a nearly 4000sf house.

Yeah. I would wonder about the quality.

[EmilieMadison]

Aug 29, 2012 9:02:21 GMT -5 lys said:

Sorry you are having a tough time with neighbor complaints.
My question is why has it taken 10 months to build your home? It does not sound like you are doing the construction yourself. Typical time frame from start (digging hole for basement) to move in for our area is 14-16 weeks for a custom build.

That is anything but typical from a construction stand point. 4 months from breaking ground to being completely finished is...scary? LOL! I worked in construction financing where my job was to distribute funds based on % completion and for a custom build, the average time frame was more like 10-12 months, but longer depending on the weather conditions.

Grading the lot, digging the hole, pouring the foundation and letting it cure enough to begin building is a 4 week process on it's own IF conditions are perfect. They're never perfect.

[shopgirl07]

What a bunch of assholes. I really hope that once you move in things get better, dealing with unreasonable asshole neighbors is no fun.

Oh, and lol at 14 weeks for a custom home build.

[chessie]

Stay away from neighbors, this is why I moved to the country, I just shoot them if I dont like them. kidding of course. Stares, whatever, just let it go, these things happens with builders at times.

[mollybrown]

Yeah, we're doing a semi-custom build, and that's taking 6-7 months. The only homes around here that go up in 4 months are less are truly cookie cutter small homes.

[kadams767]

Aug 29, 2012 6:56:51 GMT -5 dochas said:

To play devil's advocate - people who like strict HOAs like to have everything just so. And don't want to live next door to a hole in the ground for a year. I wouldn't have sent you a letter or said any of those things, but how happy would you be living next to a never ending construction project that may or may not have a sloppy foreman?

If I moved next to an empty lot, I would assume that this would happen. Especially seeing as though I also had my house built.

[birdmom]

My boss had his custom home built in 8 months. However, he spent a lot of time later doing upgrades, so I don't know how custom it actually was...lol.