Somebody hold me :/

[traveljunkie13]

DH got home from work this morning with "awesome" news. He is being sent to the states (we live in England) for some stupid training thing for 5wks.....3wks after my due date

I am in full panic mode now. We knew he had to go to this stupid class soon but he had asked to go over the summer so we would have some time to find a routine and I could also go home for part of it.

Solo parenting a 5yr old, 3yr old, and possible 3wk old. OMG. We have no family that can come help and while I've made friends here they are still in the friendly acquaintance level.

::breathes into paper bag::

Thankfully my last 2 deliveries were "easy" and I had very fast recoveries.....let's pray this one goes just as well! Going past my due date or having to have an emergency c/s will completely screw me.

[luv2rn4fun]

((Hugs)) praying for the best, especially a very on time (maybe a little early) baby and a super fast recovery. Ditto PP...consider hiring a nanny or at least a baby sitter for the older two a couple hours here and there. Sorry your DH's training couldn't be delayed longer...that's really inconsiderate of his manager

[traveljunkie13]

He already delayed the training once (they originally had him gone during my due date)....plus the military doesn't give a damn about things like this. It is all about what works for them.

Luckily my oldest is in school and my middle one does half days so that will help. Though pickups/drop offs are already hard as hell since they are at different schools.

Doubtful on the nanny idea since we haven't even been able to find a babysitter here yet despite multiple attempts.

I know rationally I can do this....we've survived deployments and other long TDYs with no help, but agh! The timing blows! I'm already having the normal end of pregnancy panic about adding a kiddo to this crazy......this news just threw it into hyper mode

I see a lot of frozen waffles and chicken nuggets in my kids future (plus insane TV time!) . Nutrition and quality activities be damned! Haha!

[frozentoes]

That is definitely rough, but at least you have enough advance notice to prepare as much as you can. Stock the freezer with easy dinners and if you can't find a nanny, maybe look into someone to help with housecleaning or something else that might ease the burden on you a little. Wishing you the best of luck with everything!

[mary]

Oh my goodness, I'd be freaked out too.

Deep breaths, and no one ever died from eating waffles and chicken nuggets.

Perhaps you could reach out to people on base and see if there's anyone who has found a reliable sitter?

[djc315]

Oh wow. Does he have any sort of paternity leave option? DH was military, so I know that it's a long shot.

Does his command know that it's only 2 weeks after your due date?

Would it be possible to fly a relative over to help out while he's gone?

[D2M]

Noooooo. There is zero possibility that the training could be delayed even by a little bit? There has GOT to be some way to postpone this. I'm sure you're an awesomely strong woman (living overseas, away from family, survived deployment in the past, etc.), but a newborn + two other kids + no one to help you out sounds crazy, even if everything goes really well with birth and recovery. You need an extra set of hands! If your H really can't postpone this, I'd seriously, seriously consider flying over a family member or trusted friend to live with you. Can you hire a baby nurse for a week or two? At minimum, I'd find someone to do school dropoff and pickup for your older kids. Good luck. You've got this.

[pinotgrig]

Eek - I would be stressing, too!

H was across the country for work for 2 weeks when G was new-ish. I can't remember if I had started back to work yet or not. My mom came and spent the weekend with me, which helped.

If there's no way to move it, then prep as much as you can beforehand and have low expectations while he's gone.

I highly recommend you get on care.com and try to find a nanny to help out - whether it be with drop offs in the am or help in the evenings. Or both. Do you have any family who can come help?

You will make it through. And your H owes you big time. Lol

[usuallylurking]

You can do it! I had a c-sec with DS3, my older two were 3.5 and 14 months. H was home for one week then left for 3. We survived!

[thom]

I hope you have a really smooth delivery and recovery. That's rough timing. But like you said you have survived before, and you will again. I see nothing wrong with waffles & chicken nuggets.

ETA: I agree w/ others to try to find at least some babysitting help or maybe family can visit. But no matter what I know you will make it.

[Aquatica]

I'm sorry to hear that your H will be gone so soon after baby is here!

Not sure what branch your H is in but do you have a company FRG you could network with and meet other spouses? Not sure if it's just for deployments but the on base child care services offers 16 hours to spouses when service members are gone. H is Army so I'm limited to what thay branch offers, hope you have some similar programs!

[traveljunkie13]

Thanks for the encouragement ladies. The initial panic has mostly calmed down!

We live 45 min from base so that support is rough especially with the kids school times. They know my due date & all the issues but they will not allow him to delay it again.....it's all about the "mission" . He was originally denied paternity leave due to staffing issues but I do know he is pushing hard now to get the 2wks off!

A few moms in the area have offered to help with school drop offs since that is honestly my biggest issue at this point. I'm crap at asking for help but I'm working on it!

Sadly no family members could help. We both come from some crazy families and have cut relations from most of them. The one person who would be able and willing to help is my (much younger!) sister but she is in college and couldn't come on those dates.