M doesn't get to sit with a group at kindergarten

[ginger]

M doesn't seem to care at all (as in I had no idea), but it broke my heart to find this out today. Dave went to her Valentine's day party.

He didn't think it was significant either.

M has been struggling this year listening at school. She pulls cards weekly. We've tried everything we could with concequiences at home, no consequences at home, positive reinforcement, etc.

Her teacher keeps assuring me she's a "good" kid, but sitting alone doesn't translate to good kid to me.

I feel really bad because her teacher is pregnant, and it has been insanely rough. That also means she's been out so much M hasn't had her teacher for a full week ever. The subs are different each time.

Even though M does best with routine, I still always expect M to listen.

I don't know how to help my kid, and that sucks.

M's teacher was supposed to talk to the guidance counselor 2 weeks ago, but I think I'll call myself next week to get her opinion.

This sucks.

[balletofangels]

I keep telling myself I won't participate in these posts lol but, sometimes sitting by themselves is just what's best for the kiddo. They don't get distracted or distract others and are often happier with their own space. It looks exclusionary, but often is more comfortable for the kid. Did she say how she feels about it?

[ginger]

Feb 11, 2016 19:56:25 GMT -5 balletofangels said:

I keep telling myself I won't participate in these posts lol but, sometimes sitting by themselves is just what's best for the kiddo. They don't get distracted or distract others and are often happier with their own space. It looks exclusionary, but often is more comfortable for the kid. Did she say how she feels about it?

I always love that you do.

M doesn't seem to care at all. She's never mentioned it.

I wonder if it was recent. Just seems strange it was never mentioned. We get an agenda home every day.

Eta: I'm going to PM you.

[balletofangels]

Feb 11, 2016 20:00:21 GMT -5 ginger said:

Feb 11, 2016 19:56:25 GMT -5 balletofangels said:

I keep telling myself I won't participate in these posts lol but, sometimes sitting by themselves is just what's best for the kiddo. They don't get distracted or distract others and are often happier with their own space. It looks exclusionary, but often is more comfortable for the kid. Did she say how she feels about it?

I always love that you do.

M doesn't seem to care at all. She's never mentioned it.

I wonder if it was recent. Just seems strange it was never mentioned. We get an agenda home every day.

It is strange she didn't mention it, but it may be a trial thing. The fact that M hasn't mentioned it is a good sign IMO

Just as a caveat, I have a student in one of my classes. He's in third grade and had a rough year. He's been highly unsuccessful in most specials. He asked if he could sit alone in my class and I complimented his advocating for himself. I have zero issues with him in his new seat. He is quite literally a model student. Obviously, at least one teacher tried this for him and he liked the results.

[eddy]

Jack sits by himself during instruction. It is what is best for him. He actually prefers it because he is not distracted.

She is fine!

Also we are never told about the change in seating.

[ginger]

Feb 11, 2016 20:04:47 GMT -5 eddy said:

Jack sits by himself during instruction. It is what is best for him. He actually prefers it because he is not distracted.

She is fine!

Also we are never told about the change in seating.

Thank you.

I hope this works. Just threw me for a loop not knowing.

I've always told her teacher we back her up on whatever she tries. So maybe she didn't think to mention it.

[textbookcase]

I sat alone as a kid and LOOK AT ME NOW! I do think she should be able to be with the group during parties, though.

[hopecounts]

It is probably for the best but I know it must be hard to see/know.

Given that she hasn't responded to typical corrections have you considered having HR evaluated for ADD (inattentive type)?
The inability to listen and needing routine can be trademarks of female presentation of this type of ADD.
If that is the cause she really and truly can't help this behavior.
If so then knowing can help you help her do better by knowing what she needs to focus.

[ginger]

Feb 11, 2016 20:08:58 GMT -5 whattheheck said:

I don't have an issue with kids sitting along during instruction time in the classroom. But during party time? They should be included by either being allowed to sit at an empty desk with the group, pulling up a chair and sharing, or bringing their desk over. It's one thing to separate a student for educational purposes, but it's entirely another to do so during social events.

You know, maybe this is what I couldn't articulate. That really made me sad that she wasn't in group for the party, but apparently a lot of parents were there, so the kids were distracted anyway.

[McGavin]

While it would bother me I wasn't told about it I could see this being good for my kid. She always comes home from school starving because she talked all through lunch and didn't eat.

[ginger]

Feb 11, 2016 20:13:08 GMT -5 hopecounts said:

It is probably for the best but I know it must be hard to see/know.

Given that she hasn't responded to typical corrections have you considered having HR evaluated for ADD (inattentive type)?
The inability to listen and needing routine can be trademarks of female presentation of this type of ADD.
If that is the cause she really and truly can't help this behavior.
If so then knowing can help you help her do better by knowing what she needs to focus.

I do wonder sometimes. I'll bring that up to her teacher and guidance counselor.

We used to joke she was almost OCD with her need for order as a very small child. Maybe there always was something to that in regards to attention/behavior.

[ginger]

Feb 11, 2016 20:15:37 GMT -5 McGavin said:

While it would bother me I wasn't told about it I could see this being good for my kid. She always comes home from school starving because she talked all through lunch and didn't eat.

oh bless it! Lol our girls would love each other, but starve to death.

[hopecounts]

Feb 11, 2016 20:17:09 GMT -5 ginger said:

Feb 11, 2016 20:13:08 GMT -5 hopecounts said:

It is probably for the best but I know it must be hard to see/know.

Given that she hasn't responded to typical corrections have you considered having HR evaluated for ADD (inattentive type)?
The inability to listen and needing routine can be trademarks of female presentation of this type of ADD.
If that is the cause she really and truly can't help this behavior.
If so then knowing can help you help her do better by knowing what she needs to focus.

I do wonder sometimes. I'll bring that up to her teacher and guidance counselor.

We used to joke she was almost OCD with her need for order as a vevery small child. Maybe there always was something to that in regards to attent5/behavior.

And that's why I mentioned it she's at a really good point to check and see and because if it's there she's young enough to start using some behavior mods (and if you choose meds) and get the best results long term but old enough for the Vanderbilt scale to be appropriate and accurate.

[McGavin]

Feb 11, 2016 20:18:45 GMT -5 ginger said:

Feb 11, 2016 20:15:37 GMT -5 McGavin said:

While it would bother me I wasn't told about it I could see this being good for my kid. She always comes home from school starving because she talked all through lunch and didn't eat.

oh bless it! Lol our girls would love each other, but starve to death.

They never shut up. Adorable little fuckers.

[ginger]

Thank you guys.

You've helped me sort this out logically instead of emotionally.

That's definitely what I needed.