Family Vacation...How to Split up who pays what?

[starryfish]

Okay my mom's side of the family is doing a big family vacation next summer. I am heading up this trip for the family. 

There is my grandfather and he had 3 children and then all of their families, so:
-Grandfather
-Sibling A and her family (Sib A and her DH, Daughter and her DH with one baby, Single Adult Daughter)
-Sibling B and his family (Sib B and his DW, Adult Son, Teenage Son)
-Sibling C and her family (Sib C and her DH, Son1 and his W with 2 teenagers, Son2 and his wife and 3 young daughters, Son3 and his wife with one baby)

So that makes a grand total of 17 adults, 3 teenagers, 3 kids, 2 babies. 

There are 9 rooms that are already decided to be divided like this:
-Room 1-Grandfather
-Room 2-Sib A and her DH
-Room 3-Sib B and his DW
-Room 4-Sib C and her DH
-Room 5-KID/Teenager/Adult single kid room-5 people in this room
-Room 6-Sib A's daughter, her DH, baby
-Room 7-Son 1, his W
-Room 8-Son 2, his W, their 3 girls
-Room 9-Son 3, his W, their baby

ETA: Everyone above will have a bed except 2 of the 3 girls in room 8 and the babies. 

The total for the house is $11k for the week. I am trying to figure out what the FAIRest and easiest way it is to figure out how much each person owes. I was thinking of charging per room the same price, but then my grandfather has to pay double? Or split the $11k by 8.5 rooms so that my grandfather doesn't have to pay double?

PLEASE help me!!!! Thanks! :-)

[Deleted]

That's a cluster. Don't make grandfather pay at all and have everyone else pay for gpa. He earned it.

[starryfish]

May 26, 2016 10:08:02 GMT -5 @lemonlover said:

That's a cluster. Don't make grandfather pay at all and have everyone else pay for gpa. He earned it.

Lol it is for sure. That won't work. He won't allow that to happen. He has a lot of money and spends it on his children. My Aunt even mentioned that he might pay for all of it. 

[zarapipe]

I would do it per room, with the room with all the kids being split.

[dottyblue]

I don't understand why dividing the total by 9 means your grandfather pays double?  He's only occupying one room, right?  Every room costs $1,222.22  End of story.  If there is a room that has multiple families in it (Maybe room 5?  you lost me), that room gets divided by 2 and the cost split.

Good luck to you.  LOL

ETA: If you mean grandfather pays double because he's paying for one person to occupy a room when all the other rooms are double (or more) occupancy, I wouldn't figure it this way.  You're going to end up in a mess if any of the children have a SAHP; do they get a discount since they only have one income?  Just go with the cost per room or you are going to drive yourself mad. 

Don't expect to make everyone happy.  It's not going to happen no matter how you calculate the cost... unless if you foot the bill yourself.

[ECB]

May 26, 2016 10:00:45 GMT -5 starryfish said:

  Or split the $11k by 8.5 rooms so that my grandfather doesn't have to pay double?

I think I'd do this.  Just seems the easiest. 

[starryfish]

May 26, 2016 10:13:19 GMT -5 dottyblue said:

I don't understand why dividing the total by 9 means your grandfather pays double?  He's only occupying one room, right?  Every room costs $1,222.22  End of story.  If there is a room that has multiple families in it (Maybe room 5?  you lost me), that room gets divided by 2 and the cost split.

Good luck to you.  LOL

Because if I divide it by 9, Grandpa pays $1200 and if he was "sharing a room" he would only pay $600 for himself. I don't want to charge him the full room amount bc it seems unfair to "penalize" him for my grandma being gone. 

[ECB]

May 26, 2016 10:13:19 GMT -5 dottyblue said:

I don't understand why dividing the total by 9 means your grandfather pays double?  He's only occupying one room, right?  Every room costs $1,222.22  End of story.  If there is a room that has multiple families in it (Maybe room 5?  you lost me), that room gets divided by 2 and the cost split.

Good luck to you.  LOL

Right- but if two adults are all sleeping in the other rooms, that means the adults are essentially paying $650 per person where as granddad is paying $1200.  I think that's what she's saying. 

Obviously this doesn't factor in the kids, but looking at it from a "per family" POV, all the fmailies are paying less per person than granddad.

[starryfish]

May 26, 2016 10:11:07 GMT -5 @foodielicious said:

each adult is 1 - kids over 12 are adults

each kid under 12 is 0.5.

so 11K/25 = $440 pp.

Option to make babies zero because usually their parents are bringing along everything they need and they don't cost extra for activities. so $478 pp with kids under 12 being half price in both scenarios.

I originally was thinking along these lines, but then 2 of the girls in Room 8 don't have a bed. They will bring a blow up for them. Is that fair to charge them the same?

[ECB]

May 26, 2016 10:16:34 GMT -5 starryfish said:

May 26, 2016 10:11:07 GMT -5 @foodielicious said:

each adult is 1 - kids over 12 are adults

each kid under 12 is 0.5.

so 11K/25 = $440 pp.

Option to make babies zero because usually their parents are bringing along everything they need and they don't cost extra for activities. so $478 pp with kids under 12 being half price in both scenarios.

I originally was thinking along these lines, but then 2 of the girls in Room 8 don't have a bed. They will bring a blow up for them. Is that fair to charge them the same?

I used to do a big group trip w/ a group of college friends.  I htink part of the reason the trip stopped happening was this ^^^  It was getting too complicated w/ all the kids/ the adults/ who gets the big rooms/ who gets stuck in a small room/ etc.

With FRIENDS, i feel like there is more focus on "fair" where as with family, I'd HOPE that eveyrone can keep sights on the overall point of the trip.

We;re actually going on a HUGE extended family trip in July (think 12 bedroom house and there is concern there isn't enough room) and THANK GOD the two "patriarchs" are just paying for the house.  And I'm gladly accepting our room assignment in a really small room w/ no attached bath.  Beggars can't be choosers....

[starryfish]

May 26, 2016 10:21:18 GMT -5 @foodielicious said:

May 26, 2016 10:16:34 GMT -5 starryfish said:

I originally was thinking along these lines, but then 2 of the girls in Room 8 don't have a bed. They will bring a blow up for them. Is that fair to charge them the same?

Are the girls children?  Maybe make all children under 12 free and then it's 11K/20

Yes. They will be 7 and 5

[starryfish]

May 26, 2016 10:19:24 GMT -5 ECB said:

May 26, 2016 10:16:34 GMT -5 starryfish said:

I originally was thinking along these lines, but then 2 of the girls in Room 8 don't have a bed. They will bring a blow up for them. Is that fair to charge them the same?

I used to do a big group trip w/ a group of college friends.  I htink part of the reason the trip stopped happening was this ^^^  It was getting too complicated w/ all the kids/ the adults/ who gets the big rooms/ who gets stuck in a small room/ etc.

With FRIENDS, i feel like there is more focus on "fair" where as with family, I'd HOPE that eveyrone can keep sights on the overall point of the trip.

We;re actually going on a HUGE extended family trip in July (think 12 bedroom house and there is concern there isn't enough room) and THANK GOD the two "patriarchs" are just paying for the house.  And I'm gladly accepting our room assignment in a really small room w/ no attached bath.  Beggars can't be choosers....

Yea its a mess. Sib C is paying for her ENTIRE family, so its helpful yet not at the same time because I still need to figure out how much each person owes. 

Trying to figure out where everyone was sleeping was a nightmare enough. My Aunt (Sib C) said some stuff to my mom (Sib A) which was a complete lie. Its annoying but it will be a fun time with everyone. 

Luckily all rooms have their own attached bath except the kid room. The deposit is coming up soon so I am trying to figure it out!

[Deleted]

I would do it per room, not per person...similar to how a hotel would charge you. If you were booking a hotel, you'd divide it by the rooms used, yes? I would use the same concept in a house. If grandfather could possibly pay for the whole thing, I don't think I would feel bad about him paying for a whole room by himself.

I'm having flashbacks to where I once slept in a hotel room with 6 other people. 1 king. 1 blow up bed. No couch. no trundle. Godspeed.

[dottyblue]

You're going to drive yourself mad if you try to do this per person. I would seriously just do a per-room charge and leave it at that.

It sounds like your grandfather won't care that he's paying "double", but if you are worried about it you could absorb half of his room cost into the total due for the other rooms.

[starryfish]

May 26, 2016 10:28:50 GMT -5 dottyblue said:

You're going to drive yourself mad if you try to do this per person. I would seriously just do a per-room charge and leave it at that.

It sounds like your grandfather won't care that he's paying "double", but if you are worried about it you could absorb half of his room cost into the total due for the other rooms.

Thanks. I think it is the easiest way. I can ask my Mom and Aunt if they think Grandpa should pay double or not. 

[starryfish]

oooooo and I can NOT wait until we figure out how we are going to do groceries. When we ALL go out to dinner Sib C likes to take the bill and divide by 3 (each sibling pays 1/3) EXCEPT her family is easily 2/3 of the bill!

[dottyblue]

May 26, 2016 10:32:53 GMT -5 starryfish said:

oooooo and I can NOT wait until we figure out how we are going to do groceries. When we ALL go out to dinner Sib C likes to take the bill and divide by 3 (each sibling pays 1/3) EXCEPT her family is easily 2/3 of the bill!

In that case, I would definitely do per-person and then it's simple math:  20 adults (assume the teenagers eat as much as adults), and 3 kids.  Count the kids as 1/2 adult, so each adult would pay 4.65% and each child 2.33%.  Done and done.  Each family is assigned their percentage, and that's what they pay of each grocery bill.

Can you tell I have no patience for these shenanigans?  LOL.

[starryfish]

May 26, 2016 10:50:00 GMT -5 dottyblue said:

May 26, 2016 10:32:53 GMT -5 starryfish said:

oooooo and I can NOT wait until we figure out how we are going to do groceries. When we ALL go out to dinner Sib C likes to take the bill and divide by 3 (each sibling pays 1/3) EXCEPT her family is easily 2/3 of the bill!

In that case, I would definitely do per-person and then it's simple math:  20 adults (assume the teenagers eat as much as adults), and 3 kids.  Count the kids as 1/2 adult, so each adult would pay 4.65% and each child 2.33%.  Done and done.  Each family is assigned their percentage, and that's what they pay of each grocery bill.

Can you tell I have no patience for these shenanigans?  LOL.

Yea...luckily we all live in different states, so it is not often we go out to dinner. I will be making sure that we are NOT splitting the grocery bill 3 ways, no way no how. I will make sure that is clear before we go on this trip.

[steph96]

I would do the lodging per room (just like a hotel would do). On groceries, I would use the percentage formula that dottyblue mentioned above. If dining out, I would request separate checks if possible.

[zarapipe]

May 26, 2016 10:51:33 GMT -5 starryfish said:

May 26, 2016 10:50:00 GMT -5 dottyblue said:

In that case, I would definitely do per-person and then it's simple math:  20 adults (assume the teenagers eat as much as adults), and 3 kids.  Count the kids as 1/2 adult, so each adult would pay 4.65% and each child 2.33%.  Done and done.  Each family is assigned their percentage, and that's what they pay of each grocery bill.

Can you tell I have no patience for these shenanigans?  LOL.

Yea...luckily we all live in different states, so it is not often we go out to dinner. I will be making sure that we are NOT splitting the grocery bill 3 ways, no way no how. I will make sure that is clear before we go on this trip.

You and your DH just need to be the first to say separate checks to the waiter. And have your mom jump on that too.

[imojoebunny]

We go away every year with a large group of friends. We split it by the number of adults. It looks like your grandfather is the only one without a partner? If he likes to pay, you could just split it by the number of couples + him. We do it by adults because the one single person is not in good financial shape and has 4 kids. The rest of us are, and we want him to come. For us, kids don't matter much. Adults get rooms first, and kids get what rooms or spaces left over. My kids usually camp out in the master closet. They love it.

[genet313]

May 26, 2016 10:28:50 GMT -5 dottyblue said:

You're going to drive yourself mad if you try to do this per person. I would seriously just do a per-room charge and leave it at that.

It sounds like your grandfather won't care that he's paying "double", but if you are worried about it you could absorb half of his room cost into the total due for the other rooms.

I've liked several options, but this is now my favorite.  It's the most simple way of calculating it.  

[ECB]

As far as food goes, I would perhaps collect X from every family for food. In essence, create a slush fund. All adults put in (for example $50 per person, and I would count teens as adults for this) and then kids are $25. Put that money into an envelope and as people go shopping, they can take $$ from it.

Put parameters on it based on your group, though. LIke that $$ does/ does not go towards alcohol, or that money does/does not go towards specialty items. For example, w/ our friend trip, we had such a slush fund. It seems cheap now, but in the big picture, we actually had to create rules around it - but one friend bought a watermelon "for the group". well, she stuck it in the downstairs fridge and never actually did anything with it. "The group" didn't want watermelon. That $$ should have come out of her pocket, not the slush.

Or - we were all big diet coke drinkers so that came out of the slush. but if someone wanted a special soda that only they drank, they needed to pay for it.

[daisyn]

By room for lodging cost
For groceries, keep receipts add up at end and then by room
Dinners out: separate checks


Sure it's not exact down to the penny but it's a family vacation who cares

[ECB]

Another thought too on the food front- what we do on both our (now extinct) friend trip and the extended family trip is that one family prepares dinner each night for everyone.  And that includes the cost.  They buy and prep everything for one night.  So that's their expense for dinner all week and they only have to cook one night.  It's worked well with both group trips.

With the friend trip, the slush fund is more for breakfast, lunch, and drinks.  With the family trip, there is nothing structured outside of dinner but at lest the last time we went, it all worked out.

And within this, if anyone wants to go out to eat, they are more than welcome too - but it's not necessarily "everyone" (because both trips we've been on - the group is just too big!)

[boiler717]

So for rooms 2,3,4 and 6-9 I'd have everyone pay $1222.
For the kid room I'd have the 3 siblings split (since they all have kids in it), so add $407 on to their rooms (and if they want their adult kid to pay their share, that's fine). I think grandpa sounds like he'd be fine paying his own room but if he's not you could have grandpa and the 3 siblings split both his room and the kid room, making them all pay $611.

[boiler717]

I agree with a slush fund for breakfast / snacks and each family responsible for dinner one night at the house. I'd probably do a peapod order so it's easy to see what things should be paid for by which people.

[dirtyred]

May 26, 2016 10:12:46 GMT -5 zarapipe said:

I would do it per room, with the room with all the kids being split.

This is how we always do it.  Like a hotel, you pay for the room and put however many people you want in it.

[fernweh]

Charge per room because like PPs said that is how a hotel would charge and also it will be easier for you then trying to figure out per person costs. The kids room which I believe has children from multiple families I would divide the cost of the room but the number of children and have everyone pay a per child rate for that room.

As far as food goes, I think the percentage laid of by PP would be the best and if you are really concerned about grandpa paying extra for his room, you could not charge him for groceries.

[yentl]

May 27, 2016 6:19:34 GMT -5 dirtyred said:

May 26, 2016 10:12:46 GMT -5 zarapipe said:

I would do it per room, with the room with all the kids being split.

This is how we always do it.  Like a hotel, you pay for the room and put however many people you want in it.

I would also do it this way but I would state in an email or whatever you are using to plan that grandpa isn't included in that I am planning on adding an additional X amount towards grandpa's room so he does not have to pay as much and I would encourage others to do the same. Either that or he doesn't contribute towards any grocery or food costs or something like that to try to and make up a bit for that hit.